James Weir recaps Farmer Wants A Wife reunion: Shock split after couple’s dramatic TV exit

A Farmer Wants A Wife success story has taken a turn, with the couple revealing why they split. James Weir recaps.

A Farmer Wants A Wife love story fizzles out at Sunday’s reunion when it’s revealed one of the city girls dumped her farmer because he kept wasting too much time on farm work.

We’re all blindsided. Who could’ve predicted that, in this day and age, farmers are still doing manual labour? Gross.

It’s as if we invented AI for nothing.

JAMES WEIR:Read all the recaps here

Let’s cut to the chase: Big Deano and Teegan are over. It’s shocking. Their love seemed built to last — like an Isuzu D-MAX.

Farmer Dean was so sure of his choice. He even wrapped up his time on the show early — sending all the other sheilas home and shacking up with Teegan despite that weird text message he received about her alleged secret boyfriend.

He was swept up in the chaos. After a lifetime in the outback, this whirlwind was the most exciting thing to happen to him since the mouse plague.

For Teegan, it was all a novelty — a molasses-scented dream. A fun excuse to wear oversized flannel shirts and jean shorts. But when she realised life on the farm looks nothing like the stylishly rustic pages of a Donna Hay cookbook, enough was enough.

“We decided to go our separate ways,” Farmer Dean grunts to the others at the reunion. “It was definitely a shock.”

That’s when Teegan pipes up and explains how she was blindsided by the realisation that living on a farm involves farm work.

“It was my decision,” she says. “My expectations were a little different to what it was.”

Oh Teegan. You’ve got more vowels than sense.

‘I was shocked to learn Farmer Wants A Wife actually involves farms. You should make that more clear on the application form.’

Couldn’t they have made it work? It’s not as if the other couples who are still together have had it easy.

Farmer Joe says he got sick of Sarah always talking to him. And Farmer Todd’s mates still hate gym franchise manager Daisy. Then there’s Sophie, a city girl who was so grossed out by Farmer Dustin’s crap shack that she relocated to the next shire over where she’s temporarily residing in a Best Western motel until the renovation is done.

It’s called compromise!

Our gal Sam Armytage gave up Sunrise to live on a farm and Teegs couldn’t even stick it out for a month.

The only relationship that seems to be without turmoil is Farmer Bert’s, after he dumped his entire harem of ladies and dedicated his soul to a paddock of fruit.

To quote Carrie Bradshaw in that final episode of Sex And The City: the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with your pineapples.

Cue You’ve Got The Love.

Facebook: @hellojamesweir