Splatoon 3 game review: What you need to know before buying
We’re scoring this one nine out of ten-tacles.
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Nintendo’s Splatoon franchise has always struck me as one of its more interesting endeavours.
Flipping the usually graphic third-person shooter genre on its head, the games offer a kid-friendly experience built around inking both your surroundings and your opponents instead of killing them.
While the original Splatoon offered something fresh, Splatoon 2 was considered little more than a port of the original WiiU title with a new coat of paint. So how does the latest iteration of the series, Splatoon 3, hold up and is it worth the purchase?
According to a press release, the game has already sold more than 3.45 million units over a three-day period in Japan, making it the biggest Nintendo game launch in Japan so far. However, the game hasn’t received the same amount of love in countries like Australia and the USA just yet.
I spent an unhealthy amount of time playing through the new title over the past three days to find out if it should – and it’s safe to say I’m officially addinkted.
Best deal on Splatoon 3: $68 at Amazon Australia (down from $79.95)
WHAT’S NEW?
Straight off the bat, it’s clear that Splatoon 3 has been given many of the quality-of-life upgrades we’ve been waiting for. And yes, that does include finally being able to skip past the despised newscast intro.
While some elements of the game, such as competitive multiplayer, have only received incremental upgrades, other returning elements like the single-player campaign are much more thoughtfully designed this time around.
Co-op horde mode, Salmon Run, also makes a return and fans will be happy to hear that you can now queue to play the mode 24/7. It’s not overly different from Splatoon 2, but it does have a few tweaks that make it more enjoyable, such as the removal of time restrictions and the addition of more Boss Salmonids.
You can also find a fun new collectable card game called Tableturf Battle located in the backstreets, which you can play once you’ve hit Level 4. The one-on-one turn-based card battle requires you to match up cards to try and ink more of the board than your opponent. It’s somewhat Tetris-like in execution and offers a nice change of pace from the chaotic mess of Turf Wars.
There’s also a bunch of new collectibles, new weapons, new ways to play with friends and a new ability to chuck your tiny Salmonid pal, Smallfry, to reach things you can’t during single-player mode.
WELCOME TO SPLATSVILLE
Splatoon 3 kicks things off by offering personalisation of both my Inkling and my Smallfry companion, who quickly receives a stylish new hairdo (see: battle-ready mohawk). Then, after a quick and somewhat awkward train ride, we’re arriving at our newest hub setting, Splatsville, aka the “city of chaos.”
It’s bigger and better than the hubs of both Splatoon 1 and 2 and, while it does take some time to get your bearings, it’s a fun metropolis to explore.
Naturally, there’s the main lobby, along with a bunch of stores you can use to freshen up your gear once you’ve racked up enough coins or Sheldon Licences to do so. More on that later.
First, we need to address the creepy old man staring at me from the sewer.
STORY MODE
Defying everything my parents taught me about stranger danger, I slither my way down the sewer pipe after him and enter our latest setting – a desert region known as the Splatlands.
Of course, this is no ordinary stranger – it’s Cuttlefish challenging me to a staring standoff complete with perfectly timed tumbleweeds.
Eventually, he gets to the point.
The Great Zapfish that powers Splatsville has been, well, squidnapped, and apparently it’s my job to get it back – free of charge.
It may not be the greatest job offer of all time, but Story mode is actually an excellent starting point for both new and returning players. Not only will Cuttlefish teach you new moves and abilities in each stage of the game, but there’s also a bunch of unique challenges that make the whole thing very worthwhile.
It’s also an easy way to stay entertained and hone your skills whenever your friends aren’t available for co-op play.
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Where the single-player mode of Splatoon 2 always felt like a bit of an afterthought, things are much more fleshed out in this iteration.
The gameplay feels much slicker, with most areas having undergone some much-needed finetuning. Weapons also feel more balanced, there’s more variety in mission structure and the whole thing is just a lot more fun.
As I mentioned earlier, you’ll also get a Smallfry sidekick to throw at objects that are out of reach, which is a truly amusing addition.
MULTIPLAYER MODES
Of course, multiplayer is still the bread and butter of Splatoon 3 and Turf Wars are still the main component of the game.
As always, two teams have three minutes to splatter as much of the arena as they can with their team’s ink, while taking out opponents along the way.
You’ll also need to change into your cephalopod form to swim through ink to quickly recharge your weapons or surprise unwitting enemies.
Matches are fast, hectic and a hell of a good time – yet remain simple enough that brand new players can quickly get the hang of them.
In a much appreciated update, you can also now queue with friends on the same team in Regular Battle rounds.
If you want to play the ranked modes (aka Anarchy Battles) though, you will have to make it to Level 10 to do so. And, as much as I love a good Turf War, playing them endlessly just to unlock the other modes really does take some of the fun out of it.
Once you have finally levelled up, you’ll be granted access to the four creative game modes. Unfortunately, they’re all Battle modes we’ve already seen.
We’ve got the King of the Hill-esque ‘Tower Control’ Battle, where the goal is to stay in control of a moving tower until it moves past a checkpoint located in enemy territory.
Then there’s ‘Rainmaker’, which is very similar in premise to Tower Control. The golden Rainmaker cannon spawns in the middle of the map and each team must try to nab it and get it to a pedestal in enemy territory to claim victory.
‘Splat Zones’ is meanwhile very similar to Turf Wars, but the objective is simply to keep certain parts of the map inked for a predetermined amount of time.
Finally, there’s ‘Clam Blitz’, which sees players race to collect as many Golden Clams as they can and toss them into the opposition’s goal to score.
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As great as Splatoon 3’s single-player mode is, it’s the multiplayer offerings that really make the game so addictive. Unfortunately, they also highlight a major problem – connection issues.
On the first day I played, I was frequently unable to connect to multiplayer modes, or would otherwise start playing a game, only to have one or more players kicked out part way through.
While this isn’t entirely unexpected over the course of a launch weekend, it has been hugely frustrating and has not significantly improved in the days since. Though plenty of players have seemingly had no connection issues whatsoever, a quick look through Twitter and Reddit shows that many have had a similar experience to mine.
We can reasonably expect these issues to become less frequent as time progresses but, for the time being, it’s a real pain in the ink sac.
WEAPONS
One element that has always kept Splatoon games feeling fresh is the ability to switch up your weapons for a new experience every time you play.
Each time you level up while playing a multiplayer mode, you’ll earn one ‘Sheldon Licence’ which can then be used to purchase yourself some sleek new equipment – and there’s plenty of options to choose from.
In addition to straightforward gun options like Blasters, Shooters, Chargers and Dualies, you can opt for quirkier weapon choices like Rollers (giant paint rollers) or the Brella (an umbrella which both shields you from your opponents and fires ink in close-combat).
There’s also brand new weapons to choose from including the bow-and-arrow like Tri-Stringer and the Splatana Wiper – a katana-like weapon with a giant squeegee attached.
As always, there’s more to choosing a weapon than personal preference. Each design has different stats – including damage, sub and range – so you’ll need to decide which stats you’re willing to sacrifice in favour of others.
Each weapon is also paired with a special move which can be used for a limited duration. Again, there’s a thin layer of strategy here, as some special moves have the ability to turn the tide of a battle while others offer very little in the way of an advantage.
FASHION
Fashion is yet another iconic part of the Splatoon franchise but, similar to weapon choice, there’s more to it than simply looking runway-ready.
All headgear, clothing and footwear comes equipped with abilities that complement your playstyle and provide advantages during battles.
Each item also has between one and three additional ‘Ability’ slots which can be filled up with Ability Chunks as you level up the item.
It’s worth paying attention to these slots before you make a purchase too, as three empty slots is always going to be more beneficial than one.
SHOULD YOU BUY SPLATOON 3?
Thanks to quality-of-life upgrades, a fantastic new Story mode and the addition of great new extras like Tableturf Battle, it’s safe to say Splatoon 3 is the best game in the series yet.
Nearly all of the issues seen in the previous games have been addressed, other than the connectivity issues which do still desperately need to be ironed out.
While it would have been nice to see some new multiplayer modes this time around, Splatoon 3 does an excellent job of building on the foundations of its predecessors.
More than just an upgrade, the latest addition offers enough new features to keep both new and returning users happy, while keeping the marvellous mess of fresh fits, great soundtracks, and fun weaponry choices that make the franchise so iconic.
Overall rating: 4.5/5
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Price: $79.95
Where to buy: Splatoon 3 is available now on Nintendo Switch at major retailers like Amazon Australia, Catch, Big W and eBay Australia. It’s also available for download through the Nintendo eShop.
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