The incident, which is under police investigation, led to two boys being expelled amid a furious national discussion about respect for women.

Dr Merry’s actions have been branded a “masterclass in PR 101” by one top PR honcho who advises a range of private schools.

“Everyone’s been ringing me asking who’s advising him,” he said.

“There are not many examples of people who can own it like this. Mark talks like a normal person and doesn’t use a lot of educational jargon and is relatable.”

“It shows you can’t stop something bad happening at a school but you have to take control of it. He was clear, transparent and decisive – everything you want in a leader.”

“Rather than damage the reputation of the school, it’s made some parents want to send their kids there.”

The media veteran said it was important to “put someone up to speak on a big story like this as if you create a vacuum someone else will fill it. Then you talk until people stop asking questions”.

Shane Healy, former head of 3AW, also said he would give Dr Merry “a tick for doing a good job”.

“He handled it pretty well, he made clear what they were doing and got on the front foot.

“While not everyone will agree with the decision to expel the students, he certainly seemed to be well-informed and decisive.”

Mr Healy said schools with major public scandals would “put the principal up as a rarity”.

“They would consider the risk of kicking along the story but in this case the community was enraged and there is no way they could have just put out a comment and moved on,” he said.

Unlike most large private schools in Victoria, Dr Merry and his team do not employ professional media advisers.

So, what’s Dr Merry’s secret?

“I’ve got a great team around me who are very good operators,” Dr Merry said.

“This means they get on with work while I am free to be the public face of the school.”

Timeline of a scandal

Dr Merry said he was given an “initial heads-up” about the spreadsheet last Tuesday evening via an anonymous tip.

“We had nothing much to go on and had to conduct an investigation from scratch and it took Wednesday and Thursday to get a handle on it,” he said.

“The most important thing is to establish what and who.”

The school’s leaders held meetings throughout the weekend and “by Sunday we thought we had it right”.

A communique was sent out to all school parents on Sunday, along with different letters to the families of the young women and staff.

On Monday, Dr Merry and his team met with year 11 students “to put things into perspective and ask them to rally around the girls”.

They also met with year 12s.

“Whilst not involved we thought it would help for them as leaders to step in and offer support to other students,” he said.

Then there was a staff meeting and meetings with the parents of the girls and the boys.

On Sunday evening, he started receiving calls from journalists, including Channel 9’s Christine Ahern who broke the story.

His phone hasn’t stopped ringing since.

“I’ve done dozens of interviews, dozens,” he said.

“If people are hearing what’s happened, then I want them to hear it from the source.

“I am well aware that publicity can have an impact on the school’s reputation, but to me that’s secondary to the welfare of the girls,” he said.

“Me getting out there and saying it was wrong and that I was mortified and that we are doing something about it and owning it is a way of backing up those young women,” he said.

“It’s better to front the media than shut up shop.

“The girls need to hear from me that I’ve got their back. They are even asking for me to be included in their meetings from now on which is good.”

Dr Merry said he’d been “heartened to hear the school is doing a good job”.

“It was important that the two young guys know there are severe consequences for their actions.”

What now?

Dr Merry said he was helping the boys involved find new schools.

“The hard work begins now, trying to make these young girls feel good about being here and we are working with other kids on this,” he said.

“Boys in our school uniform have been abused in public, which is hard because the vast majority of boys are absolutely appalled.

“These kids are going to be part of the solution, not part of the problem. Lumping them all together isn’t going to help anyone.”

Dr Merry also paid tribute to the police liaison at Knox who had been “brilliant”.

“We met on Tuesday and they are looking at the material to see what steps they might take,” he said.

How other private schools handle a scandal

Who does it badly?

St Kevin’s College

A comparison to the way St Kevin’s College handled the Four Corners allegations in 2020 has been raised by a number of commentators. The school’s then principal Stephen Russell was not interviewed on camera to address serious allegations.

One PR hack said: “The Yarra Valley story was as big as the St Kevin’s story and could have gone wrong. St Kevin’s got it wrong when Russell did not front up. It would have gone a long way to turning things around.”

The school continues to have a number of staff and parents who turn to the media to expose issues at the school.

Melbourne Girls’ Grammar

The death of a senior teacher, David Simpson, in 2023 was, in the words of one media expert, “handled very badly”. After the school shared news of his death, it emerged that Mr Simpson was facing a range of serious child safety allegations. Principal Toni Meath did not front the media, nor did the school ever directly address what it knew and when.

Loyola College

Back in 2022, the principal of the school, Joseph Favrin, was charged (and eventually convicted) of a sexual offence. Not only did the school only issue statements through lawyers, but it allowed photos of Mr Favrin smiling and posing with staff to be included in a “triggering” alumni magazine a few months later.

Loreto Toorak

The up-market Catholic girls’ school was in the centre of a media storm in 2023 after the Herald Sun reported its rowing staff were taunting girls from other schools, among other misdemeanours. Principal Angela O’Dwyer called the allegations “rather unpleasant” and “unsubstantiated/incorrect”. Despite this, the school admitted it launched an investigation.

Others

A straw poll of journalists reveals that Scotch College has an external PR team which “has not always been easy to deal with”. A number of Ballarat schools, including Ballarat Clarendon College, have also “struggled with a lack of transparency” said one writer. Others mentioned The Knox School, and Shelford Girls’ Grammar.

Who does it well?

Wesley College

Other schools that have managed student crises well include Wesley College, which had principal Nick Evans front the media over disclosures of more than a dozen instances of alleged sexual assault, harassment, and disrespect to girls by male students back in 2021. Mr Evan’s extensive interviews, apology to the girls and vow to ensure the school did were positively viewed. However, the school has refused to engage more recently with other families who have made similar allegations.

Caulfield Grammar

Caulfield Grammar principal Ashleigh Martin was more forthcoming after the Herald Sun reported some of its male students in 2023 sent students from Loreto Toorak a suicide instructional video. Mr Martin said the messages were “abhorrent” and launched an immediate investigation.

Haileybury College

Haileybury acted swiftly when news broke of first footy coach Matthew Lloyd partying with underage students after a big win in 2023. Not only did the school co-operate with journalists, but it investigated promptly, standing Lloyd down briefly during the process.

Others

Other schools with well-oiled PR machines who are friendly with journalists include Xavier College, Carey Grammar, Strathcona, Brighton Grammar, Whitefriars College, Marcellin College, Geelong Grammar, Siena College, Eltham College, Genazzano, St Joseph’s College Geelong and Peninsula Grammar. Schools that prefer to stay out of the spotlight include Trinity Grammar, Methodist Ladies College, Camberwell Grammar, Melbourne Grammar, and St Catherine’s School.