‘We don’t want any more children to die — this needs to stop now’: Paul and Andrea Haynes

The shattered family of a 13-year-old who died after chroming — that her parents believe she learnt about on social media — have pleaded for change to help prevent more tragic deaths like Esra’s.

Esra Haynes who passed away after trying chroming, which is believed to have been linked to social media use. Picture: Brendan Beckett

Paul and Andrea Haynes have been struggling since the sudden death of their beloved daughter Esra from chroming when she was just 13.

Esra, a popular year eight student from Melbourne’s leafy outer eastern suburbs and junior football co-captain, died after inhaling dangerous chemicals from a deodorant can.

She went into cardiac arrest and sustained irreparable brain damage after chroming at a friend’s house in March, 2023. Her parents believe it was the first time she’d tried it.

Esra’s father Paul said he believed his daughter learned about chroming on social media, as well as being introduced to it by a friend.

Andrea and Paul Haynes hold a picture of their daughter Esra. Picture: Brendan Beckett

“I’m sure she would have seen it on social media posts,” he said. “All it takes is for one child to see it and share it and spread, it then they are all doing it.”

In other countries, children as young as 11 have died after following the popular social media “chroming challenge”.

Although sites such as TikTok have since restricted access to such videos that received millions of hits worldwide, young teens are still sharing clips about the deadly practice.

Mr Haynes is fully supportive of the campaign to raise the age for social media to 16.

“It’s fantastic. Kids today are treading such a fine line and the algorithm attacks them and draws them in,” he said.

“It’s a really vicious circle. At 13 you are still a child and the decisions you make are not always sound decisions.

Esra was just 13 when she died. Picture: Brendan Beckett

Esra’s shattered family don’t want more children to die. Picture: Brendan Beckett

He said Esra was on social media and used it to communicate with friends. “Their generation was forced out of school and had nothing left but social media,” he said, referring to Victoria’s extensive lockdowns during 2020 and 2021.

“It’s hard too as we live on a rural property so it can be isolated.”

Mr Hayes says children in their teens “don’t see past tomorrow and believe everything they see online”.

“When I was that age we had to look things up in the library or in an encyclopaedia, now there’s no control to what they are accessing.”

Mr Haynes said he and his wife got Esra, and their other children, Seth, Imogen and Charlie, involved in sport to “keep them away from all of that”.

“But you never know what is going to happen, do you? I want to do what I can to make sure no other family goes through what we went through with Esra.

Mr Haynes pleaded with the government to “make the change to social media and help keep kids safe”.

“We don’t want any more children to die, this needs to stop now”.