Clare Hepburn’s abusive ex-husband Christopher Millar ‘evil in every sense’

Clare Hepburn lived in constant fear of her psychotic ex-husband who would headbutt or strangle her until she passed out, even kidnapping his own daughter.

Clare Hepburn unknowingly married a murderer who went on to violently abuse her for their 10-year marriage. Picture: Jason Edwards

Clare Hepburn is certain she wouldn’t be alive today if she hadn’t escaped her murderous ex-husband.

Like so many relationships that turn violent, the 47-year-old mum remembers being lured in with grand romantic gestures that made her feel lucky to have such a great man.

“He was such a charmer … he wowed with everything. He would get me flowers, take me out for dinner and after a long day at work he’d have dinner ready and the bed turned down like at a hotel,” Ms Hepburn said.

After a whirlwind courtship, Ms Hepburn married her partner Christopher Millar in 1999.

The bliss continued for two years until the birth of their daughter.

“When I got pregnant, I saw another side to him,” Ms Hepburn said.

The next few years were a nightmare Ms Hepburn counts herself and children lucky to have survived.

Millar kept secret from her for years that he had killed before.

Clare Hepburn was abused for years by her former husband and convicted murderer Christopher Millar.

He was 19 when he fatally stabbed his best mate more than 50 times to the chest, neck and stomach in Canberra in 1988.

His 18-year-old victim was later found stuffed in an abandoned car with “DOG” written in blood on the boot.

Once a secret, Millar’s murderous past became an unspoken threat that hung heavy in the family’s Crib Point home.

Ms Hepburn said: “When I married him I knew he was on parole because he used to go to the parole office. I knew he had been in jail and had robbed his first bank at age 12. But the internet back then wasn’t what it is today.”

Ms Hepburn endured years of abuse by Millar, an amphetamine abuser who would often threaten to the burn their house down.

“He loved his knives. He would headbutt me and strangle me until I passed out,” she said.

“There was one time we were at a holiday house in Phillip Island and I spent the entire day in the kitchen. He was threatening to kill me with a knife.

“I thought I was going to die that day,” she said.

Worse were the threats against Ms Hepburn’s children.

She had a son from a previous relationship and said Millar would constantly warn her: “If you take my daughter, I will kill your son.”

Millar knew the children were his wife’s weakness, and in 2008, he kidnapped their young daughter during a fit of rage.

Clare says her ex-husband would threaten her with knives, headbutt her or threatened her children. Picture: Jason Edwards

Ms Hepburn said Millar stormed into their home and began “smashing things up”.

“My daughter came out of a room and I told her to get in the car. He used his car to block us in the driveway and went inside and got a knife. We were trapped and he broke in through the window and took our daughter,” Ms Hepburn said.

The girl, aged just 7, eventually got to safety and Millar was arrested and jailed for three months.

Ms Hepburn made a clean break. She shifted to Tasmania but even there she was not safe.

After Millar’s release from prison, Ms Hepburn claims he stalked people close to her, including her nail technician, to get information about her whereabouts.

After two years Ms Hepburn moved back to Melbourne into a home she fitted with CCTV cameras and an alarm system.

Millar would continue to find her and she would continue to move.

“He would ring me and say ‘I know where you are’,” Ms Hepburn said.

The disturbing game of cat-and-mouse continued until she shifted to Perth where she stayed until she learnt Millar was again behind bars.

He was jailed in 2018 for a minimum term of two years and three months over a brutal attack on a woman in which he threatened to “put a bullet through her chest”.

In sentencing County Court judge Mark Dean said efforts to rehabilitate Millar from his never-ending life of crime had “failed”.

“In my opinion it is clear from that history that you pose a real risk to the community and the protection of the community from you is an important sentencing consideration in this case,” he said.

Clare says she never would have come forward with her story if Millar hadn’t died.

Going public on her decade of torment is something Ms Hepburn would never have considered out of fear for her safety.

But in late April she learnt her tormentor had died and she suddenly feels free. And safe.

“It was never going to stop. He was never going to be rehabilitated,” she said.

“Some people are born bad. He was evil in every sense.”

Ms Hepburn said the control her ex-husband gained over her during the marriage was slow and tactful.

“It was so subtle how he slowly changed his ways,” she said.

“One day I woke up and thought how did I get here? It was hard to talk to friends and family because I was embarrassed and would make up stories about why I was bruised.

“I am not a silly woman. I was raised well and I’m not from a poor or abusive background.”

Ms Hepburn encouraged women in similar situations to do what they can to safely seek help and leave.

“It can be done. You just have to do it on the quiet because it’s one of the most dangerous times,” she said.

“I would be dead by now if I didn’t. There is no doubt about it.”