‘Cancer is my teacher’: What being told she was dying taught Rachel Dur about life

Diagnosed with cancer days after giving birth and since told she has months to live, Rachel Dur won’t give up but is writing letters to her son so he knows "who I am”.

Rachel Dur and husband Onur celebrate son Ashton’s 2nd birthday in Melbourne on January 9, 2023. She plans to “stick around” for many more. Picture: Supplied

Rachel Dur had been a mum for just 13 days when she was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer.

Two years later, it has spread to her lungs and liver, conventional medical treatment options have been all but exhausted and she has been told she will not survive the year.

But, at 37 and with a toddler to raise, the Melbourne mum and former corporate high flyer refuses to say die.

From high-dose vitamin and turmeric infusions to hyperbaric chambers, hyperthermia treatment, immunotherapy and even a radical treatment using sound waves — she is prepared to try pretty much every alternative therapy she can find to “stick around” to raise her son, Ashton.

Rachel’s cancer story includes medical oversights and blunders but is ultimately one of determination and hope against the odds.

“She’s like the Sherlock Holmes of her own cancer, trying to solve the puzzle,” her identical twin sister, Samantha Gomizel, said.

“Rach just says ‘I’m not dying, this can be cured’ … and I won’t let her die.”

Rachel Dur with her twin sister, Samantha Gomizel, in California in October 2022. Picture: Supplied

Rachel with son Ashton in November 2022.

Ms Dur’s cancer journey starts in 2019, in California’s Silicon Valley, where the investment director had temporarily moved to troubleshoot problems in a private equity firm.

It was there, at 34, she met the man who would become her husband, the handsome, Turkish-born Onur Dur, and to her delight fell pregnant.

She says fears she raised about a lump in her right breast were dismissed by her obstetrician at the world-leading Stanford University Medical Center as the result of pregnancy hormones, and no tests were performed.

Ashton was born on January 9, 2021, and while breastfeeding Rachel showed the lump to a lactation consultant, who shared her concern and sparked the investigations that would finally follow and lead – 13 days after Ashton’s birth – to a breast cancer diagnosis.

Ms Dur has lodged complaints with Stanford and the California Medical Board – seen by the Herald Sun – over what she believes was a lack of gold standard care from her Stanford obstetrician and is considering legal action.

Rachel’s cancer was of the aggressive triple negative variety and blasted with chemotherapy and radiation.

There was also lumpectomy surgery to remove the tumour but remnants remained, and in an extraordinary blunder, her lymph node sample – which had also been tested for cancer – was lost.

On August 24, 2022, after extensive treatment, Rachel was told by Stanford doctors there was nothing more they could do for her, and she had less than 12 months to live.

Rachel when she was pregnant. Her doctor had initially dismissed and not tested the lump in her breast. Picture: Supplied

Rachel with husband Onur Dur and newborn son Ashton in January 2021 at Stanford hospital. Picture: Supplied

She returned to Melbourne in mid-December and is now receiving quality palliative care and pain management through Cabrini hospital, while continuing complementary therapies.

In a recent hyperbaric chamber session, Ms Dur found herself in the company of tennis stars, in Melbourne for the Australian Open, including Novak Djokovic.

“Rach still absolutely has hope,” Ms Gomizel said. “She’s not giving up.”

Her sister’s resilience and determination – forged out of a challenging childhood marked by poverty and neglect – is extraordinary, Ms Gomizel said.

Even in illness, she found the strength to set up a wholistic wellness website called Truewoo, to share what she had learnt about complementary cancer therapies with others.

“She sees cancer as her teacher, teaching her what she needs to learn in life,” Ms Gomizel said.

Those lessons included the importance of family, friends, love and hope, of dealing with past traumas and facing tough emotions.

Fighting for life itself also taught her the pointlessness of 80-hour work weeks, of stress and holding on to resentment and anger.

Rachel on day one of her chemo treatment on February 10, 2021. Picture: Supplied

Rachel, Onur and Ashton in March 2021. Picture: Supplied

Speaking from her hospital bed this week Ms Dur told the Herald Sun when she first learned her cancer had spread she felt “angry and scared”.

“I couldn’t understand how the cancer came back so quickly following extensive treatment at Stanford,” she said.

“Thoughts led me down a road of dying. Fear of dying young and my son not knowing me took over my every thought.

“After many days of crying, I stopped. I set up an email account for my son and I started writing him emails, so he could read from me, about who I am.”

Ms Dur said most alternative cancer therapies were costly and not covered by Medicare or private health insurance and out of financial reach for many Australian patients, who were otherwise out of hope.

She has spent about $500,000 so far.

“This is appalling and more needs to be done … with the right testing we can determine what is working and what isn’t, to save time and money. I’m very grateful for the financial support through Go Fund Me,” she said.

Rachel and Ashton during a cherished Turkey beach holiday and treatment break in May 2022. Picture: Supplied

Rachel with husband Onur and son Ashton at a family gathering in Turkey, in May 2022. Picture: Supplied

Rachel and Ashton share a special moment in a park in California in September 2022, not long before she returned home to Melbourne. Picture: Supplied

More money will need to be spent to complete the treatments she has started.

Ms Gomizel said the fundraiser – which aimed to raise $250,000 to put towards her sister’s alternative therapies – was started so she didn’t need to worry about money while trying everything she could, to live.

Ms Dur will combine the alternative therapies with the very best, cutting-edge, conventional cancer treatments and pain relief.

In a written response to Ms Dur’s complaint about the medical oversights in her obstetric care – also seen by the Herald Sun – Stanford said it would could conduct a “thorough internal review” of her case.

“We acknowledge there were several opportunities for improvement in your experience and we sincerely apologise for the series of events that affected your case,” a Stanford representative said in a letter.

A Stanford spokesman told the Herald Sun it could no comment on Ms Dur’s case as privacy laws prohibited it from sharing information about individual patients.

Click here to donate to Ms Dur’s fundraiser.