My head says we should be a republic but my heart has been won over by the Queen’s Jubilee

The Queen’s Jubilee was a masterful stroke of PR genius that had even the most committed republicans waving the white flag.

As a committed republican, I’m waving the white flag.

I surrender.

The royals are just toooo good to give up.

I’m taking the lead of a UK newspaper poll that found 92 per cent of Brits wanted “moaning” republicans to shut up during last week’s jubilee celebrations.

Apparently, British taxpayers felt the $50 million paid for the Queen’s Jubilee from the public purse was money well spent.

According to one survey, the Brits love their 96-year old monarch almost as much as Ed Sheeran, a bit more than Mick Jagger and the same amount as the red-headed Spice Girl before she ran out on the band.

My head says there is no reason to have a foreigner as the head of our nation – a position allocated solely on the basis of birthright, not brains.

What’s the House of Windsor given anyone other than hundreds of years of dodgy German ancestors, receding hairlines and weak chins?

The future of the monarchy looks bright. Picture: Getty Images

However, my heart was buoyed by the sight of three generations of royal heirs on the balcony of Buckingham Palace during the week.

So handsome! Such lovely uniforms! Such naughty little kiddies!

The jubilee celebrating the 70th anniversary of the Queen’s reign was a masterful stroke of PR genius for the firm, which has been struggling lately due to accusations of colonialism and irrelevancy.

But more importantly, it gave everyone a chance to see the sour-faced Duke and Duchess of Sussex take their rightful place down the back of St Paul’s – next to the corgis and behind Princess Anne’s grandchildren.

That’s what happens when you give up your day jobs but not your titles, accuse your nearest and dearest of being racist and arrive on private jets, but claim to be global environmentalists

It didn’t help that Meghan and Harry – the pious pair – are in the middle of shooting a Netflix “at-home docuseries”.

Their plans for creating “impactful content that unlocks action” came to nothing because no one wants gazillionaires telling them how to be mindful and inspiring.

Kate and Wills, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, on the other hand, were front and centre, offering up a four-day parade of colour co-ordinated outfits, toothy smiles and cute antics from the kids.

Prince Louis’ antics captured the hearts of the audience. Picture: Getty Images

Even little Louis’ tongue-poking and face-pulling was greeted with squeals of delight from the adoring public.

See? Kate and Wills are parents just like the rest of us. Well, apart from their 54 titles, 27 castles and perfectly rounded vowels.

The dysfunctional Windsor clan is one giant soap opera people can’t get enough of.

Start with one telegenic couple (Wills and Kate), throw in some energetic kids, and a much-loved dead mother (Diana).

Add an estranged brother and his nasty wife (Harry and Meghan), her crazy messed-up family and their hardly-ever-seen kids (Archie and Lili).

Then add William’s father who’s likeable but a bit eccentric, his horsey second wife (Charles and Camilla), the family matriarch (the Queen) and the black sheep uncle (Andrew).

Spicing things up is the fun uncle (Mike Tindall) and the cousins everyone forgets to remember. Footage from the week shows a woman asking Princess Beatrice: “Who are you?”

“My name is Beatrice and the Queen is my granny,” she replied.

(Wisely, she didn’t say anything about her father – the sex fiend’s friend – or her mother the toe-sucker.)

The real push for a republic may come when Charles is King. Picture: Getty Images

I don’t even care that Australian now has a newly appointed assistant minister for the republic, Matt Thistlethwaite.

You know it’s not considered a plum post when it’s filled by someone no one’s actually heard of.

Thistlethwaite says people will start thinking about the republic more when Queen Elizabeth “comes to the twilight of her reign”.

In other words, when she kicks the bucket and we’re faced with the reality of King Charles.

Every family has its weak link, and in this case it’s Charles, the man who’s spent 50 years waiting for his mum to give him her job.

Charles is the man who gets around in horse-driven carriages but says he’d prefer to go by bus.

He loves talking to his vegetables and once said he once wondered if two-thirds of the globe was covered by red-carpet.

Watch the republican ranks swell once Charles steps up.

In the meantime, William and Kate are hoping to modernise the royal family for the new era.

Prince William recently stunned Londoners by hitting the streets to sell copies of the Big Issue. He poses for selfies, hugs members of the public and appears to be an all-round decent bloke.

So, for a while, there will be no more moaning from me about the monarchy – except for Harry and Meghan, of course. But they’re hardly royals anymore, are they?