NewsBite

Moment dad realises adopted son is a different nationality after 17 years

A dad realised his adopted son was a different nationality after 17 years. 

Woman shares emotional adoption mistake

A dad realised his adopted son was a different nationality after 17 years.

John remembered the rush of love he felt the first time he saw his son like it was yesterday - but in reality, it had been 17 long years since that day.

The journey to meeting his son first started when John and his wife *Layla decided to pursue adoption after unsuccessfully trying for a baby. They were paired with an ‘Asian couple’ who were unable to care for their baby son.

“We assured them that the child would be loved,” John wrote in a Reddit post that ended up being turned into a viral TikTok video.

“This was the truth because we instantly fell in love with our baby boy. However, after about eight months though we started to feel twinges of guilt.”

Want more stories like this? Sign up to our Kidspot newsletter for more stories like this

John's adoption story was turned into a viral TikTok video. Source: TikTok
John's adoption story was turned into a viral TikTok video. Source: TikTok

"We worried our adopted son wouldn't have connection to his heritage"

The reason John and Layla felt guilty wasn’t because they regretted adopting their baby.

Instead, it was the simple fact that they, as white people, worried that they wouldn’t be able to integrate their son’s cultural heritage into their lives in the right way.

“Our perfect Chinese son was going to be raised in a whitewash household by two ding dongs,” John explained.

Introducing our new podcast: Mum Club! Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts so you never miss an episode.

“We felt unable to provide him with any sort of connection to his cultural heritage and identity.”

So they decided to expose him to as much Chinese culture as possible – enrolling him in Mandarin classes and befriending a Chinese couple who became his ‘adopted’ auntie and uncle.

“We even took family trips to China every couple of years,” John added.

RELATED: What it’s like to parent outside your own culture

The parents tried their best to exposure their adopted son to his cultural heritage. Source: TikTok
The parents tried their best to exposure their adopted son to his cultural heritage. Source: TikTok

"We realised we made a huge mistake with our son's adoption"

It wasn’t until the baby grew up – and prepared to leave for university – that John realised they had made a massive mistake.

It happened when the family were filling out some paperwork to receive financial assistance at uni.

“Digging through my office for the needed paperwork I came across his adoption papers and it was only then that I saw it,” John revealed.

“Something so obvious, so painfully brick-to-face obvious, something that neither my wife nor I, in the stupidity of our youth, had registered.

“The names on the adoption paperwork were Park and Kim (written in Korean). Our son was Korean.”

RELATED: Couple adopts and fosters terminally ill babies

John realised that he and his wife made a massive mistake with their son's adoption. Source: TikTok
John realised that he and his wife made a massive mistake with their son's adoption. Source: TikTok

TikTok weighs in on adoption mix-up

It was at that abrupt point that John’s Reddit post came to an end – so we have no idea how his son reacted to this shocking news.

However, commenters on TikTok had plenty of reactions of their own.

“He’s getting into Harvard with that story though so it’s a win,” one person joked.

“BRUH, he could have learned Korean – it’s so much easier too,” another added.

“I thought you were going to say that the adopted ‘aunt and uncle’ where his biological parents. What a twist!” a third commenter added.

Others felt like the parents had acted badly by failing to ask their son’s biological parents where they were from.

“It is awful - but I think the fact they wanted him to feel in touch with his past makes them 1,000 times better than most.”

*Names have been changed

This piece was originally published on 06.01.21 and was updated on 12.08.24.

Originally published as Moment dad realises adopted son is a different nationality after 17 years

Original URL: https://www.heraldsun.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/moment-dad-realises-adopted-son-is-a-different-nationality-after-17-years/news-story/54dd9907a986d9abe5b799005125c0d6