Sam McClure’s parking mishap, the local footy club hunting a chopper

A Melbourne footy club is considering hiring a helicopter this weekend to get a star player to the game on time. Meanwhile an AFL media identity found out the hard way where you must never park at the footy.

Sam McClure. Picture: You Tube.

We said last week silly season was heating up, but we’ve gone up a level this week.

From players going viral to the unique ways to get your gun players to the game.

Here at Quick Kicks we look at the lighter side of local footy.

Whether it be a funny exchange, a good stat or an action that’s laughed about after the game — it’s all here.

YOU CAN’T PARK THERE

AFL journalist Sam McClure was issued a reminder of an unwritten local footy rule on Saturday. Playing for Canterbury in Division 3 VAFA, McClure took a free parking space right behind the goals. It didn’t take long for McClure to rue that decision, with a shot on goal leaving his windscreen worse for wear. Breaking: ouch.

GET TO THE CHOPPER

One club is looking to the skies to make sure it’s at full tilt for a final this weekend. With one of its star players tied up with a prior engagement, this club is asking high-profile sponsors for quotes to fly their gun player in. Apparently the cost isn’t too dissimilar to Melbourne’s current tolls.

ESSENDON FANS MUST BE EXCITED

Bombers supporters need a little bit of good news after another season faded out and it’s where Koby Bewick, the son of premiership player Darren. The young gun captained Strathmore under-16 division one side to an EDFL premiership on Sunday with Bewick named best on ground. It’s been a fair year for Bewick who represented Victoria after dominating the local interleague carnival.

OH NO, DANIEL

This one is going to take a while to live down. Epping’s Daniel Rahklin went the early crow as he ran into an open goal in Sunday’s elimination final against Old Eltham Collegians. However, his hubris was immediately punished with a shanked kick straight into the goal post from inside the goalsquare. He knew it immediately and Turtles defender Nathan Gavillucci didn’t waste the chance to remind him. The encouraging pat on the bum afterwards the pièce de résistance. If only Almost Footy Legends was still around, Daniel and the Pingers would definitely be contenders for the cash or car.

‘HEY CHRIS, I CAN’T MAKE IT’

Deer Park produced a stunning win over Airport West on the weekend but the flow on effect wasn’t great for Geelong’s AFL side. After Shannon Byrnes “tweaked an ankle” playing for the Lions, he had to make a call to Cats’ management and inform them he wouldn’t be able to fulfil his running duties. Deer Park coach Jamie Madigan said “it’s been great having him back at the club when he’s available”. Geelong probably weren’t too happy...

MISSED IT BY THAT MUCH

Tough luck for East Malvern’s reserves on the weekend, which missed out on a place in the finals by one per cent. We got the calculators out and worked out that if the Panthers kicked another two goals across the entire year, they would’ve played finals footy instead of Skye.

GET OUT OF THE WAY, UMPIRE

One club issued an umpire complaint at the weekend. It wasn’t about high tackles, not unfair free kicks. This club thought the umpire’s positioning prevented it from being able to use the corridor inside 50. The club said it was the umpire who was forcing them to attack from the pocket.

GET GOOGLE MAPS

It was a disappointing day for Laurimar on Saturday but we’re sure, in time, the boys will have a laugh at Jacob Bateman’s blooper. Looking to make a quick kick-in and create some offence, the Power defender charged out of the points, believing it was the goalsquare. Three times the umpire sent him back before he realised he wasn’t in the goalsquare. Sheepishly, he finally kicked out legally, much to the mirth of hecklers on the sidelines.

Is Leigh Poholke Gippsland bound?

GIPPSLAND BOUND?

So, what does the future hold for Sorrento champion and departing coach Leigh Poholke? The prolific goalkicker and his brother, ex-AFL Crow Myles, are sure to receive plenty of offers. In fact, we heard that a powerhouse club in the Gippsland league was keen on the pair. Leigh was coy when we asked him what lay ahead. “We won’t be making any decisions in the next seven to 10 days,’’ he said. “We are letting the dust settle and let Sorrento have a chance to interview some coaches.’’

EX-AFL MAN LINKED

Still at Sorrento and it seems the Sharks are going all out to land a top-notch coach. The latest name linked to the job is Nick Stevens, the former Port Adelaide and Carlton star who coached Glenelg in the SANFL. Word is he’s living down that way.

EVERYONE WANTS STEVIE

Former Geelong gun Steve Johnson is a man in demand after it was confirmed he would depart as Yarrawonga coach at the end of the season. His name is being linked with plenty of jobs across the board but could a return somewhere down the highway be on the cards?

LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON

Parker Heatley is one game away from a historic moment. The North Heidelberg spearhead holds a five-goal lead in the NFNL Division 1 goalkicking race. If he can finish the season on top, he would join his father, and coach, Jason as league goalkicking medallists. Jason won it twice, first in 1992 when he booted 118 majors before going on to play AFL and then in 2001, kicking 110 as player-coach. Parker has 53 goals so far, ahead of West Preston-Lakeside’s Dante Colosimo (48) and Heidelberg’s Zane Barzen (40).

THIEF!

There was a Sherrin thief at one local final at the weekend. Three clubs rolled through the same change rooms and each of them departed with less footys than when they arrived. It’s understood the offender is still at large and there are no suspects.

RUMOUR CONFIRMED 

As first reported by Quick Kicks on August 7, a longstanding Victorian Amateur football club has confirmed it is looking to move to the Eastern league from next season. Bulleen Templestowe, which has played in the VAFA since 1975, last night declared its intention to switch competitions, issuing a notice of a special general meeting for next month.

SURGERY FOR SHARK

All the best to Sorrento ruck star Liam Buxton as he recovers from a ruptured patellar tendon against Frankston Bombers in the last round of the season on Saturday. He underwent surgery on Monday and was said to be in good spirits, and hoping to be ready to go with the Sharks for season 2025.

RACKING UP BIG NUMBERS

MPFNL’s most winning team of 2024 Edithvale-Aspendale mixed things up last week, taking a night off training and heading to play mini golf.

But no one could have predicted the eye-popping putting display by goalsneak Brody Colquhoun, who scored 23 — yes 23 — on one hole. The Eagles hope he’s more accurate in front of goals in the coming weeks.

ANOTHER CENTURION LOOMS

Coldstream sharpshooter Darcy Fritsch – brother of Melbourne star Bayley – is within grasp of 100 goals for the season in Eastern’s Division 3. The Cougars’ captain fired off seven majors in the weekend’s 74-point elimination final win over Oakleigh District – and needs just two this Sunday against Knox to salute the triple-figure milestone. It would be a long-awaited relief for the former VFL man, who was left stranded on 74 goals in 2021 when the season was cancelled due to Covid with several rounds remaining.