Which Dan Andrews rumour is the real deal?

From speculation he was “poleaxed” while “on the gas” to a shove from a CFMEU foe, the circumstances around Dan Andrews’ painful tumble has rumours flying.

The rumour mill is in overdrive about how exactly Dan Andrews’ fall happened. Picture: NCA NewsWire

Dan’s tumble has the mischief makers hard at it again.

Stories abound on both sides of politics on Spring Street, across our manicured golf greens and amid the toffy types on the Mornington Peninsula beaches.

According to one theory the Premier was “poleaxed” when it happened amid speculation that he was “on the gas” on Monday night before he was rushed to hospital on Tuesday after the fall.

Talk about being back on the beers!

Some were adamant he was staying at crony Andrew Fox’s Mornington Peninsula pile.

Others said he was “on the lash” the night before with Lindsay Fox’s neighbour Max Beck and was he under more than the Mornington weather?

Or was he with HelloWorld’s Andrew Burnes, a former Liberal Party treasurer?

Some are convinced the Premier suddenly fell at a BBQ.

Others say a CFMEU foe lost patience with Dan and knocked him over.

Eddie McGuire was a witness according to the whispers.

The only thing the conspirators seems to agree on is that Dan didn’t just trip before he was due to attend the Yoo-rrook Justice Commission press conference, which is still the official version.

“I was admitted to hospital after slipping and falling on wet and slippery stairs,” Andrews said in a statement.

“A CT scan has revealed several broken ribs and vertebrae damage, and subsequent medical advice has recommended I remain in intensive care for the next few days.”

Meanwhile, the rumour mill is running at warp speed.

What about the Andrews buying a $6.5 million property in Karen-country at Brighton?

Real estate agents were baffled at the influx of calls about the sprawling Braaaton four-bedder after it sold on February 10.

Buxton’s David Hart, who sold the property, said he had more than 50 calls from people asking if Dan Andrews was the buyer.

“Even the people who bought the property rang and said we heard Dan Andrews has bought on the same street,” Hart laughed.

What about Lindsay Fox securing a plum job for Dan when the Premier is out of office?

Or the one about Cath Andrews moving her kids to Queensland, later Byron Bay, while Victoria was enduring hard lockdown.

It’s hard to keep up!

One would expect such rumour mongering from the Opposition. But a curious thing about many of these conspiracies is that they are been peddled by people within the Premier’s own party.

And we are not talking about your obvious types with a public agenda, in other words not a disgruntled Adem Somyurek.

That the craziest theories are being so furiously pursued should give the Premier pause for thought while he lies seriously injured at the Alfred Hospital.

Dan is the tallest poppy of them all. Watch out for the next instalment, especially if one of the theories turns out to be true.