High school sweethearts Tom and Emma Hawkins an AFL power couple
Tom and Emma Hawkins were high school sweethearts when they arrived in Geelong 14 years ago. Now as Tom reaches the latter part of his AFL career — the power couple reflect on the ups and downs that come with being in the public spotlight.
Confidential
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Surrounded by cows, ponies, chickens and tractors, plus two young daughters, Tom and Emma Hawkins rarely experience quiet times.
But for the past three months during COVID-19 restrictions and lockdown and footy-free weeks, they have capitalised on the enforced lay-off to plan for the future.
As high school sweethearts they moved to Geelong and have since followed their own paths to success.
Now as Geelong’s leading goalkicker for the past eight seasons reaches the latter part of his AFL career, there’s much to discuss with new adventures on the horizon.
“You just don’t get time like that, it was really unique and good for us,’’ Tom says. “As tough as it’s been, it put us in a positive mindframe. We’ve had our down moments with two young kids, Emma has worked and I’ve still trained. It hasn’t been a walk in the park and we’ve just been really busy.
“I love my time in football and I love the football club environment. But (in terms of staying in the game and coaching) I think I’m ready to almost tackle a new challenge or adventure. I’ve come straight down (to Geelong) from after school. I remember I had my last school exam, geography, it was on a Thursday and on the Friday I came straight down here to Geelong. I see my friends that have gone to uni, and not for one second do I wish my life turned out any different than it has. I’ve been blessed to have had a lot of luck but you do think about what’s next.”
Both Tom and Emma were raised in the NSW Riverina region and true to their upbringing, have lived on a farm in Barrabool for the past four years with their daughters Arabella, known as Belle, 3, and Primrose, known as Mimi, 1.
Tom will turn 32 this month and while he hopes to play a few more years at Geelong, he is realistic about what lies ahead.
“Emma has travelled a bit, we’d love to travel a bit together as a family. We’re really keen to, when the time comes, explore whatever it may be,” he says.
Emma, who has worked in the lifestyle and online space, just launched her third range of Aussie made clothing brand, Homegrown Kids.
A couple with more than 250,000 social media followers combined, the Hawkins have amassed an enviable stats sheet.
“Tom is in one of the toughest careers you can endeavour in and from 18 hasn’t had a break,’’ Emma says.
“While he would never change it (and) has been completely well compensated and paid accordingly for his commitment, he hasn’t had time to try anything else. We know there will be a succession plan for after football and we’re acutely aware of it. Whether that starts in one year, two years or three years, it’s something you talk about. All of a sudden when COVID hit and Tom came home from work and there was a 75 per cent pay cut and potentially (Geelong doesn’t) play at all this year … it did go to show at some stage this will happen and we got to sit down as a family and talk about how does life after football really look for us. It was a good thing to reflect on.”
Emma says for the first time in years the family isn’t 100 per cent sure what the next year will hold.
“The last five years we’ve known we’ll be at Geelong. I’m not saying we won’t be (next year) but we’re pretty open minded on things. We bought this farm thinking it would be our forever (home) but we’re pretty practical people and know that you do need to move, shift and adapt with any opportunities that are presented to you,” she says.
Emma encourages Tom not to overthink the next phase. She says they will find their direction, but must focus on navigating through immediate unnerving times.
In the seemingly daily changing footy landscape during this unprecedented season, Geelong players will join Collingwood players in quarantine hubs for a week in Sydney before heading to WA. They will leave after this weekend but for how long they’ll stay away is unclear.
“It’s such a challenging time for everyone,’’ she says. “The boys are, of course, going to do everything in their power to ensure the AFL’s survival. If the hub system is the key, then they will support it.
“But that doesn’t diminish the sacrifice they are being asked to make and their families, with very little notice and to be honest, not a lot of direct communication. Everyone is impacted by this differently, everyone has private matters that need to be considered.
“While we are being told these hubs are crucial to keep the game going, the public and media will need to consider that personal matters for certain players are more important than a game, so the hub simply won’t be an option for some. And that needs to be OK.
“We are supportive, of course. Whatever it takes to keep the game going and we are grateful to our football club for doing everything they can to ensure those with young families will be looked after.”
Tom adds: “From a player’s point of view, I understand why the game needs to keep moving forward, however, it’s been really hard for the partners and family of the players.
“Like many, Emma is a working mother so juggling work and the kids without support while I’m away indefinitely is going to be a real challenge. And as Emma mentioned, everyone’s set of circumstances are different, so there will be a point, if it hasn’t happened already, where a player decides it’s best for his family to either not go or come home prematurely.
“I’m a family man, so I 100 per cent respect that. What a wild year 2020 has been, however, like we always do we will work through it to get the best outcome.”
Emma says she and Tom are well equipped, despite all the upcoming challenges, to embrace a new way of post-COVID life.
Since Tom made his debut for the Cats in 2007, Emma has worked on building her own identity outside the AFL bubble.
After university she started lifestyle blog Who Loves That and also worked in sales and marketing for Bauer Media.
“There was a moment in my career that I felt I needed to take a step aside and create my own brand and identity and get respect standing on my own,’’ she says. “When I started Who Loves That, blogging was only just starting to happen and I had just moved to Geelong. I was really at a point in my career that I didn’t know what my next step was. I loved working for Bauer Media and Gourmet Traveller and I don’t mean to sound arrogant at all because I’m not very good at a lot of things but what I have been good at is taking opportunities in front of me and I could see something moving in the digital space and I rode the wave. Who Loves That was a really good platform to start and grow and create content, especially in the lifestyle sector which I was passionate about and still am.
“There were probably five years where we just didn’t do a lot (of media) together at all. That was a decision I made until I got to a point where I was feeling more confident in my career individually. Not only do I feel confident on my own but we’re about to enter that next stage of life.”
She and Tom have worked together with brands and companies such as Woolmark, Dairy Australia, Nature One Dairy and Myer.
Among those who inspire them are Emma’s sister Caroline who is an ICU doctor at the Austin Hospital in the COVID ward. She cites the importance of family and staying level headed. In the greater community, Emma has become a keenly followed figure for her authenticity, modesty and wisdom.
She admits she still gets as nervous now as when she first attended the Brownlow almost a decade ago.
“To be honest I still get nervous at a Brownlow or some of Tom’s things,’’ she says. “When a significant other does have a job that involves you going to things like that you sometimes don’t know where you stand. I mean that in terms of my sense of identity. I’m just Tom’s partner and unfortunately or fortunately I’ve been afforded some great opportunities because of that, and I don’t take those for granted at all. I’m so proud of that but you do get stereotyped and critiqued and there’s a lot of commentary on looks. Being a female is a big part of it but I’m genuinely so proud of him and I’m the proudest wife you could be.
“Most people are (good). It’s such a small minority. For footballers, they have to learn to become desensitised. If Tom listened to every negative thing said about him he wouldn’t be able to pick up a football any more. That’s a part of the job but it’s not part of my job.
“A lot of people say you put yourself out there or you know what comes with the territory. But it shouldn’t. It’s not a reason for people to have a stereotype or be nasty, especially if it’s anything to do with images of a woman. It’s not enough to say you put yourself out there. Every partner, male or female, AFL industry or other industry, should feel comfortable and confident going to something to support their partner because they’re proud and they want to have a night out without feeling like they’ll be scrutinised and judged.”
Emma says one of the biggest misconceptions about the partners of footballers is that they’re catty or competitive. She supports others in their endeavours as they do her, and there are some partners who like to stay out of the spotlight.
While she and Tom work through the next chapters together, as they have done since their first kiss in year 12, they are not certain if they will expand the family.
“We probably thought we’d have three or four kids at the start,’’ Tom says. “I always used to think the happy and healthy thing was a bit of a weird one but it’s so important. You have two kids and they are so healthy and for the most part of their life they’re pretty happy, that is so important. We just don’t know, but I’m a bit outnumbered. I’m trying to make the most of it while they enjoy my company. I can already see they’re going to be a bit of a handful.”
Emma laughs. “I said to Tom if we have another we’d probably have twin girls. When the girls are being cheeky and Tom will think it’s funny and I’m like, ‘Tom, it’s not funny because one day we’ll hear them sneak out to see (Cats teammate Patrick Dangerfield’s son) George on the weekend,’ and it won’t be funny.”
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