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Runaway Bay’s Doryaan Hape Apiata on Javarn Nofoagatotoa, his near-death experience and the RLGC Grand Final

When Doryaan Hape Apiata’s cousin Javarn Nofoagatotoa died in Sydney one year ago it felt like a part of himself tipped over the edge as well. READ THE EMOTIONAL STORY

Runaway Bay Prop Doryaan Hape Apiata is dedicating the final to his cousin Javarn Nofoagatota, who committed suicide last year. Doryaan has worn Jah's jersey every game this year and will do so again in the Grand final. Picture Glenn Hampson.
Runaway Bay Prop Doryaan Hape Apiata is dedicating the final to his cousin Javarn Nofoagatota, who committed suicide last year. Doryaan has worn Jah's jersey every game this year and will do so again in the Grand final. Picture Glenn Hampson.

WHEN Doryaan Hape Apiata’s cousin Javarn Nofoagatotoa died in Sydney one year ago it felt like a part of himself tipped over the edge as well.

The cousins, who grew up together in the rural New Zealand province of Hawke’s Bay, had left their families behind to attend Coombabah State High School’s rugby league academy in 2015.

The self-described country bumpkins were each other’s only family as they adjusted to life on the Glitter Strip, 2500km away but a world apart from the lives they had left behind.

“We were sort of the same person, to be honest,” Hape Apiata, 23, said.

“The neighbourhood we came from was hard. All the gang stuff was around, poverty and all of that, but as family we just stuck together and it made us who we are.

Rugby League Gold Coast grand final between Runaway Bay and Tweed Heads at Pizzey Park. Runaway Bays Javarn Nofoagatotoa charges at the line.. Picture Glenn Hampson
Rugby League Gold Coast grand final between Runaway Bay and Tweed Heads at Pizzey Park. Runaway Bays Javarn Nofoagatotoa charges at the line.. Picture Glenn Hampson

“We’ve always stuck together through thick and thin. We were the only ones who knew each other moving to Australia so we always stuck close, like peanut butter and jelly.”

They played the same positions, for the same clubs: Gold Coast Eagles in rugby and Runaway Bay in rugby league.

Brief stints apart never lasted – the cousins missed each other too greatly to be separated for long.

When Javarn, 22, accepted a well-paid scaffolding job in Sydney it was the first time in eight years the Kiwi kids allowed distance to creep between them.

Three weeks later Doryaan received a text message from his cousin that he now recognises was his final goodbye.

“He just said, ‘I love you cuz. I hope you know I’m a good person,’” he recalled.

“I thought nothing of it because we had always had those type of ‘bro’ chats. But I had a feeling this was a bit different.”

An hour later his phone rang again with news that shattered the 135kg prop like no tackle ever could.

“There was no warning sign,” he said. “I still can’t really explain it. There was just nothing, to be honest.

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“Disbelief. Empty. I still haven’t gotten over it to be honest. I’ve still got no words.”

His closest mate, a hulking Maori warrior whose facial tattoos couldn’t disguise a kind and gentle nature, was gone.

With him it felt like Hape Apiata’s connection to their adopted home was also lost.

“We were the only two boys that had come over from Hawke’s Bay,” he said.

“We wanted to come here because it was the GC – compared to where we were from it was everything.

“We were culture shocked and shell shocked when we first moved here but we lived together and explored it together.

“With him gone it does feel like part of my connection to here is gone, but also there are things here that help me out.

“We had the same footy friends so even though he’s gone, in a sense, with the footy, he’s here still.

“He’s gone but never really gone because no one here is going to let his memory fade.”

Throughout this season Hape Apiata has received permission to wear a special jersey honouring his cousin.

Runaway Bay Prop Doryaan Hape Apiata is dedicating the final to his cousin Jahvarn Nofoagatota, who committed suicide last year. Doryaan has worn Jah's jersey every game this year and will do so again in the Grand final. Picture Glenn Hampson.
Runaway Bay Prop Doryaan Hape Apiata is dedicating the final to his cousin Jahvarn Nofoagatota, who committed suicide last year. Doryaan has worn Jah's jersey every game this year and will do so again in the Grand final. Picture Glenn Hampson.

His No.19 jersey has been embroidered with Javarn’s name, the only name printed on any jersey in the competition, to allow him to carry his cousin onto the field with him.

On Saturday Javarn will return to the Rugby League Gold Coast A Grade grand final on his cousin’s back.

“He’s been on my mind ever since it happened,” Hape Apiata said.

“The only way I could represent him was through footy because it was something we both loved and it was what brought us both here.

“When I’m wearing his jersey it just fills my heart.

“It fills the void for me a little bit personally because I’ve been empty this whole year.

“To feel like I’m doing something he’d love means a lot to me.”

He has drawn strength from his cousin’s spirit.

One month ago Hape Apiata was on the receiving end of a high tackle that smashed loose all of his front teeth.

Within days an infection saw his lips balloon out to an incredible size. It spread to his cheek and then his nose.

When his eyes began to swell he sought out a dentist, who dispatched him immediately to hospital for treatment to save his life.

“The doctors were scared,” he said.

“It had gone from my teeth to my cheek to my nose to my eyes, and the only place it can go from there is the brain.

Doryaan Hape Apiata survived a life-threatening infection of the teeth. Picture: Supplied
Doryaan Hape Apiata survived a life-threatening infection of the teeth. Picture: Supplied

“I didn’t have surgery but I was on an antibiotic drip for two days (to get the infection under control).

“The doctor said his professional recommendation was to take the year off or maybe even more.

“But mainly because of this guy,” he said, looking down at his jersey. “I looked down at his jersey and it was pretty much telling me to hurry up and play. To see his name again I’d play broken.”

Hape Apiata has been a colossus in 2020, who can claim great responsibility for Runaway Bay’s undefeated run to the grand final at Cbus Super Stadium on Saturday.

He and all of Javarn’s former teammates will dedicate the decider to their mate.

If you or anyone you know needs help phone LIfeline on 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue on 1300 224 636.

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Original URL: https://www.goldcoastbulletin.com.au/sport/nrl/runaway-bays-doryaan-hape-apiata-on-javarn-nofoagatotoa-his-neardeath-experience-and-the-rlgc-grand-final/news-story/28f790598ed87cbb53fd500362e8ce84