Aussie athlete’s inspiring journey after losing the love of his life
After losing the love of his life to cancer, a bodybuilder said the sport and fitness training saved him as he struggled with grief.
Gold Coast
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Petrice Stone’s dying wish as she battled terminal cancer was for her husband to keep chasing his dream of becoming a professional bodybuilder.
Although every instinct told Dan Stone to stay by his wife’s side at every possible moment, he continued to chase his dream with the blessing of the love of his life - as she battled the cancer which ultimately claimed hers.
Now ranked among Queensland’s best bodybuilders, Mr Stone said the sport and fitness training saved him as he struggled with grief from his wife’s passing close to two years ago.
It was at the National Amateur Bodybuilders Association (NABBA) Queensland Championships on the Gold Coast that Mr Stone competed for the first time in front of his sick wife two years ago.
“Petrice was my number one supporter, she always had my back no matter what,” Mr Stone said.
“But (she) was my first love of my life and we ended up getting married, and that was the first person I lost in my life. The first person I lost was (the) love of my life.”
The pair’s love story began as 17-year-old high school sweethearts in New Zealand before moving from Auckland to the Gold Coast in 2006. They continued building their family of three children - Samuel, Stacey and Summer.
Mr Stone was not always committed to fitness, and admitted struggling with his health previously, but after becoming disinterested in 12-hour days working in factories he decided to turn his life around.
“For me, what’s helped me is health and fitness. If I didn’t do that I’d probably be an alcoholic or turn to drugs. For me bodybuilding helps me cope,” he said.
But just as everything began to fall into place, Mr Stone and his wife received the news that changed their lives forever.
Australian women have a two per cent chance of being diagnosed with ovarian cancer and an even lesser chance for cervical cancer.
But for Mr Stone and his wife, hearing she not only had both but was diagnosed stage four and terminal was shocking.
“I remember thinking (at the doctors), it’s okay we’ve caught it early, she will be okay,” he said.
Mr Stone said he would have conversations with his wife often about putting aside his dream to look after her and the family, but he was met with the passionate stubbornness he fell in love with.
“She would tell me to shut up and go to the gym because she knew how good it was for my mental health.”
It did not take long for the horrific disease to start consuming Ms Stone, and within six months of her diagnosis she was moved into palliative care.
“I know a lot of people go through it but they (cancer patients) are the real heroes, just to watch (my wife) go through that. I don’t know how anyone can deal with that,” he said.
“But that’s where I get my strength. Watching her when she was dying and to be so positive, usually you see people that are just complaining and moaning and unhappy but I learned so much - I learned to look at life a whole lot differently.”
While navigating the prospect of his wife no longer being in his or the kids’ lives, Mr Stone continued to train to compete in his first bodybuilding competition.
Committing to the Nabba Elite Physiques Queensland Champs in 2022, Mr Stone was treated to a final special moment with Ms Stone as he took to the stage to show off his amazing transformation.
“It was so special - you could hear her cheering and she was cracking up. I can still remember it. I’ll never forget it.”
Despite the misconceptions surrounding bodybuilding as a sport, Mr Stone said the feeling of fulfilment and achievement while he is on stage showcasing his best physique brings him happiness.
“It brings me so much confidence and discipline, I just love that about bodybuilding. I love the discipline and the principles it teaches you about life - it teaches you how to be strong which helps me in my life.”
Shortly after the Queensland Champs, Ms Stone took a turn for the worse.
“She was just in so much pain, she was telling me I’m going to be ready to go soon,” Mr Stone said.
She passed away on June 26, 2022, surrounded by her husband and close relatives.
Mr Stone admitted while he wore a strong facade for his family and others, he pushed aside his own grieving as he struggled to come to terms with his new reality.
“I did get angry at times, especially on milestones like my son’s 21st birthday and my daughter is starting high school next year.
“Things like that she misses out on, you feel robbed of. You get angry and you feel like quitting, saying I want to go and do drugs, get wasted and turn to alcohol - but I just didn’t.”
Bodybuilding was one of the few activities that kept Mr Stone from falling into a dark place, competing in several events including the Nabba Southern Hemisphere Championship in Sydney last year with no coach or support team.
“I’ve had so many challenges mentally, there were times I thought about suicide…I locked myself in the room for months after she passed away, I couldn’t get out of the house, I couldn’t get out of bed.”
Now, the professional bodybuilder runs a successful online coaching business.
“I just want to inspire people that there’s always a way, there’s always something to look forward to,” he said.
“When you go through so much darkness, there’s always gonna be a light.”
The NABBA Southern Hemisphere Championship this year is looking quite different for Mr Stone with not only a coach and support team heading to Sydney with him, but also his daughter.
Mr Stone said having his daughter in the crowd was akin to having a part of his wife there.
“I think coming into this season you are going to see a lot of rewards come and some already have - because I have an angel (with) me.”
Looking to the future, Mr Stone is setting his sights high for his bodybuilding and business.
“One day (I want) to open a gym, that’s the main goal, and just try to do as much as I can before I run out of time,” he said.
Despite the ongoing rollercoaster of grief, Mr Stone said his wife would be proud of how far he and the kids had come since her passing.
“She’ll be smiling. She would be proud of me for doing what I love - and she would be proud to see her daughter playing netball.
“She’s probably rolling her eyes sometimes when she sees me doing my flexes.”