There are 417 reasons why I would never have kids; nothing can change my mind

“I think it’s selfish to have a child just so someone can take care of me when I’m older or so someone can carry on my ‘legacy’.”

Alexandra Feiam

5 min read

August 29, 2024 - 9:15AM

Family Life

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There are many reasons why someone decides to go child-free; some people can draft up an entire list of arguments about why they never want to have kids.

It all started when New Zealand influencer Danni Duncan asked her audience for their “number one reason why they don’t want kids”.

Rylee, a 22-year-old from the US, responded with an exhaustive list of reasons - 417, to be exact.

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22 year-old's list of 417 reasons she doesn't want kids

“I know I shouldn’t have kids”

“I have 417 reasons to never have children and not a single reason to have children,” 22yo Rylee said.

So, what are these reasons, you ask? Well, for starters, Rylee argued that kids are “so dramatic” and “talk over” her.

Other reasons include: “They steal your makeup”, “they spit in your mouth”, “terrorising the pets”, and “nonstop gargling in restaurants”.

The woman, who admitted she “hates children”, began putting the list together two years ago after years of working as a babysitter.

“I started babysitting about nine years ago and learning more about what actually goes into being pregnant and having children of your own,” she told news.com.au.

“People really don’t think about the reality of having children; they just think about how cute they are or how they’re expected to have children.”

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“As the list grew, I realised that I had so many reasons to never have children and not a single reason to have children,” she said.

Another one of the many arguments why Rylee is team #nokids is because children are “just so violent for no reason” and have “zero spatial awareness”. According to the 22yo, she's put off having kids because “they just leave things lying around” and “they take up too much space”.

The list isn’t just exclusive to life after giving birth; there are plenty of reasons why she loathes the idea of being pregnant. Other than pregnancy “f**king up my body” and suffering from “postpartum hair loss”, another case against having kids is because “I could give birth to a stillborn, then the pregnancy is worth nothing”.

“I ... think more people are becoming aware of everything that happens to your body when you’re pregnant,” she told news.com.au. “People can literally die from giving birth or even just being pregnant, and with abortion bans spreading across the US, I sure don’t want to risk it.”

Above all, the most crucial reason why Rylee refuses to become a parent is because “I know I shouldn’t have kids”.

Rylee doesn't want kids because "they're sticky" and "throw food". Picture: its.mee.rylee/TikTok

“It’s your life; the choice is yours”

She said the societal pressure for women to have children majorly influenced her decision.

“Women are expected to want and have children, and living in the US, they’re sometimes forced to,” Rylee told news.com.au. “People say I’ll change my mind when I’m older, or I have no purpose if I don’t have children, or I’m selfish to not want children.

“I would much rather regret not having a child than regret having one and putting all that weight on them. A child does not define my purpose, and I don’t care if people think it’s selfish to put my life above giving birth.”

In fact, Rylee argued that it was selfish to have children.

“Honestly, I think it’s more selfish to have a child just so someone can take care of me when I’m older or so someone can carry on my ‘legacy’,” she revealed.

The state of the world has also influenced her decision, confessing that she “would feel more guilt than anything for bringing someone into a world” that is “either on fire or underwater by the time they’d be able to enjoy it”.

The cost of raising a child is another huge factor. “Clothes, strollers, car seats, healthcare, insurance, diapers, more food, toys, childcare, college, the list goes on, and it all adds up,” she said. “People my age can barely afford rent; how do people expect us to be able to pay for kids?”

The 22yo is set in her ways. Picture: its.mee.rylee/Instagram

And she’s not the only one with this perspective.

Online, while she was bombarded with angry reactions, it couldn’t conceal the wave of positive and like-minded comments.

“As a parent, I support his,” read a comment. “I have three kids, and I also don't want kids,” laughed another.

“I got my tubes removed on Friday, and one of the nurses in the operating room, right before they were about to knock me out, was like, ‘You're so young; are you sure about this?’” wrote a third. “Be so for real right now. YES, I'm sure!”

While Rylee isn’t shy about the reasons why she’s choosing to go child-free, she iterated that she’s “not telling other people to not have kids”.

“I’m more just trying to spread awareness about what pregnancy and raising a child entails — as I did not know much before I started the list — and to let people know that it’s OK to not want kids,” she said.

“It’s also OK to have a kid and not want more. It’s OK to not want to give birth and adopt instead. It’s OK to wait until you’re really ready. It’s OK to accept how hard being a parent is and that it’s not for everyone. It’s definitely not for me," she said.

"It’s the 21st century; your life’s purpose is not defined by having a child. It’s your life; the choice is yours.”