My daughter made a disastrous 'permanent decision' at a sleepover

"The older girls were taking advantage of her, and I know she'll regret it later," the furious mum wrote.

A mum has taken to a popular parenting forum to express her anger over her daughter coming back from a sleepover ... not quite the same. 

The woman writes that she was initially reluctant to let her 11-year-old hang out with three older girls - and her gut reaction ended up being spot on. 

She now wants the internet to weigh in on her dilemma - should she ban her daughter from spending time with these friends again?

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Her daughter never expressed a desire for more piercings. Image: IStock

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"It's very uncharacteristic of my daughter"

The anonymous woman, who people believe is from the UK, took to the parenting thread to explain her predicament.

"Over the weekend, my 11-year-old daughter went to our neighbour's house for a sleepover. Our neighbour's daughter is 13 and she also invited two other friends who are 14 and 15.

"I was a little reluctant about my daughter spending time with older girls but we know our neighbours well and often go away with them."

The mum said that when she discovered that her daughter had come back with "seven piercings in one ear and three in the other" she was obviously shocked. Apparently, the tween had never expressed an interest in such a thing, and so the woman believed that she was "likely influenced by peer pressure."

"It's very uncharacteristic of my daughter," she asserted. 

Her main concern other than hygiene was how easily her child succumbed to "doing something stupid."

"She's also too young to make what I consider a permanent decision and she may regret the piercings later."

She concluded by saying that she's now considering banning her daughter from spending time with her neighbour, but is unsure if this is fair punishment as they're close friends.

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"This is normal tween behaviour"

Commenters' parental instincts kicked in and immediately everyone was asking the same thing - where the hell were the parents?!

"I'd definitely have a talk with the parents and your daughter to see what exactly happened and what her thought process was," one concerned follower wrote.

Another said, "You obviously need to talk to your daughter about peer pressure, but I would actually be talking to the other parents as well. This was unacceptable, there are so many issues here and I would hope they would want to address them with their daughter as well."

A third echoed: "The parents need to know this is not at all okay. I’d also take them out so hopefully they close without scarring and clean the holes well once the piercings are removed."

And this person made a good point, asking, "Do all of the other girls also have seven to 10 new piercings from this gathering? If not, then they were absolutely taking advantage of her as she is younger."

On the other hand, some noted that this was just "normal behaviour" for girls that age.

One said, "This is pretty normal preteen behaviour. I’m not gonna lie, I used to pierce other people's ears when I was in primary school and my sister's friend pierced her belly button for her when she was like 13."

This person agreed, replying: "That is exactly what I was thinking. In the '90s this was a thing. My younger sister was always piercing someone."

"Tweens do stupid piercings, dye their hair stupid colours, give each other henna tattoos. It’s part of them carving out their own identity."

This article was originally published in March and was updated in July 2023. 

Originally published as My daughter made a disastrous 'permanent decision' at a sleepover