Mum Kelly Casey’s thoughtful act for grandmothers on Mother’s Day

Gold Coast mum Kelly Casey is saving Mother’s Day for our aged care residents with her Adopt a Grandparent initiative – and it’s going granny-gangbusters

Kelly Casey could feel it the moment she walked through the door.

Visiting her grandparents almost daily at their Gold Coast nursing home, she couldn’t help but see that all eyes would immediately turn to her as she entered.

Kelly Caseyand the very special granny Joan McPherson who first inspired Kelly with her longing for company at Tri Care Cypress Gardens. Picture: Glenn Hampson

Minutes later, as she settled in to tea and a chat with her family in their room, the first knock on the door would come.

More often than not, it was Joan.

With no family nearby to visit, Tricare Cypress Gardens resident Joan McPherson instead adopted Kelly as her own.

Sometimes she just wanted to say hello, sometimes she might come in and sit down or even stay for a cuppa, Kelly always welcomed her … along with the others who would soon follow.

After all, the mum of one knew that no matter anyone’s age or ailment, she could provide the best medicine for their greatest ill … her time to treat their loneliness.

And when her grandparents passed away, Kelly couldn’t stop thinking about Joan and all the other aged care residents without regular visitors or family nearby.

That’s when she decided to start the Adopt a Grandparent initiative.

Liaising with facilities across the Coast, she organises, collects and distributes gifts and donations for the most vulnerable aged care residents.

And this Mother’s Day, she has an army of Gold Coasters lined up to honour every granny in aged care that they can.

Picture: Glenn Hampson

Already she’s been distributing an arsenal of gifts from Coast residents to care facilities across the city … and it’s a movement that is growing ever greater.

“My grandparents were in aged care for four years and my mother, brother and I would visit them all of the time. At least five days a week if not every day,” says Kelly.

“I started to notice that every time we came in, there was a gravitation towards us from lonely residents with no visitors.

“They would pop in and say hello, sometimes they would come in and sit with us.

“The staff were always great and the facility was fantastic, but nothing makes up for that time with people who care about you.

“My mum was great, she would do morning teas with them, run errands for them, but shortly after my grandparents passed away, she died too.

“So that first Christmas without my own older family members, I wanted to look after someone else’s. I tried to find a group or charity that does that but there wasn’t anything. So I put a post on Facebook that I was adopting grandparents and donating gifts for Christmas, and suddenly I had started it myself.

“We started with nine adopted grandparents receiving Christmas gifts that year, and now we’re at 1300.

“For every bit it might have helped our seniors, it’s helped me too. After the loss of my own family, it meant so much to me to keep that connection to the older generations.

“When we lose them, we lose so much … their history, their stories, their wisdom.”

Kelly says this is the second Adopt a Granny gift drive for Mother’s Day, but says recipients need not be biological mothers.

She says the purpose of the day will be to celebrate every woman in aged care, whether they have given birth or not.

Picture: Glenn Hampson

“Last year was our first Mother’s Day gift drive and it was incredible. It made it the best Mother’s Day for me to go in with my daughter and hand out all of these gifts,” she says.

“The reaction is just beautiful. Especially from the women who aren’t biological mothers, they are just so thrilled to be included.

“They absolutely deserve to be included because they are mothers. They are the mother and grandmother figures of our community and they deserve our love and respect.”

Kelly says while the Adopt a Grandparent initiative is designed to collect and distribute gifts, many of the adopters and adoptees have gone on to form close friendships.

She says many adopters are businesses, kindies or even Air Force Cadet groups and they coordinate their own visitation schedules with nearby aged care facilities.

“We can’t roster visits from all of our adopters as there are a lot of checks to do and you also don’t want to infringe on someone’s privacy,” she says.

“But we do encourage people to include notes or contact numbers or addresses and from that real relationships have formed, which is beautiful.

“Our aim is to make the moment we are celebrating one that brings joy, love and a sense of community and belonging and well as gifting them items they benefit from each day.

“Many elderly transition into aged care without warning and we also provide care packages which include toiletries and all the essentials. We take donations for these all year round.

“At its heart, this is all about building engagement in our community and including our older people in our lives.”

Kelly says the last couple of years have been especially tough for aged care residents given the impact of Covid restrictions.

She says many still live in fear that they will be locked down and shut out again.

“It’s been really tough. Even when aged care residents can have visitors, it’s been behind masks.

“They’re left with half a face and that means they’re missing out on half the communication - they haven’t seen a smile in so long. Many have hearing difficulties and that means they miss so much of what is said when you can’t see someone’s mouth and the words are muffled behind a mask.

“Certainly things are getting back to normal now, the activities are starting back up, entertainers can come back in, there is a real sense of relief, but also still that fear of isolation.”

Kelly says she has been overwhelmed by the community’s support for the Adopt a Grandparent initiative, and believes that, ironically, Covid has played a part in its success.

She says all residents – both young and old – are desperate for connection after the years of isolation.

“I think everyone is just longing for that human contact and making emotional connections with each other, we’ve all been through a lot. But none more so that our aged care residents,” she says.

“We have all lost someone and I think when you lose someone you have a bigger appreciation of every individual. The pandemic has made us all think about things a little more.

“It’s a credit to the Gold Coast community that they have grown this initiative so big so fast. It fills my heart.

“The greatest payback though is seeing how the aged care residents respond. They are the dearest people, they just want to be remembered and be loved. And that’s what we’re doing.”

So to Kelly and Joan and all the mothers and grandmothers of the Gold Coast, biological or honorary, Happy Mother’s Day.