Lilie James’ killer just wouldn’t take no for an answer
Family and close friends of beloved water polo coach Lilie James believe she was bludgeoned to death for calling off her relationship with a man who just wouldn’t take no for an answer.
Police & Courts
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Family and close friends of beloved water polo coach Lilie James believe she was bludgeoned to death for calling off her relationship with a man who just wouldn’t take no for an answer.
Three days after the 21-year-old student teacher’s death at St Andrews Cathedral School, her devastated mum, dad and brother are still “numb by the non-understanding of why,” a close family friend said.
Sydney real estate agent Daniel Makovec said that Ms James’ ex-boyfriend Paul Thijssen had “stolen everything from us”.
“She broke it off by the sounds of things, so he stole her from us, he took away everything, ripped us to pieces.”
Ms James was found dead in the school’s gym bathroom just before midnight Wednesday.
Police suspect Netherlands-born Paul Thijssen, who also worked at the school, beat her with a hammer after she broke off their five-week relationship.
CCTV footage suggests Thijssen left the school an hour after following Ms James into the bathroom, then drove to the eastern suburbs.
He sat in his car for two hours after the attack before he called police to tell them where to find Ms James around midnight.
The 24-year-old’s body was spotted in water at the base of a cliffs near Diamond Bay Reserve on Friday by workers on a construction site at Vaucluse.
Mr Makovec, who has known Ms James since she was born and is best mates with her brother, said he started a GoFundMe, even though the family were reluctant, because he wanted to be able to do something for “them and for Lilie”.
“It’s not for today, nor for tomorrow, it’s for the future,” he said.
“The last 48 hours for us have been so full of laughter remembering her and her bubbly, beautiful personality — and full of tears.
“She was a beautiful girl who just literally filled the room up with smiles.
“And now it’s nothing but absolutely emotional stress.”
Mr Makovec said neither Ms James’ parents nor brother knew Thijssen, a Netherlands national, who worked at the school with her.
“She was a student teacher there at the school, he was a student teacher.
“Lilie was teaching drama, dancing and water polo, he was a cricket and hockey coach. We didn’t know him.
“The hardest part is we will never have all the answers. We are burning.”
As students prepare to return to the school on Monday, Deputy Head of School Brad Swibel urged parents to manage access to the news.
“It is also helpful to take particular care about your child’s exposure to news events,” he wrote in a letter to parents.
“The consistency and frequency of news cycle images can be frightening for young children who don’t understand the notion of distance and have difficulty distinguishing between reality and fiction.”
He also encouraged parents to talk with their children about social media.
“Tell them to not respond to or post provocative, opinionated or emotional posts and to leave group chats or socials if the content is uncomfortable,” he wrote.
“Reducing or stopping social media use during emotional times can be beneficial.”
Extra counsellors will be on site and many exams have been postponed or cancelled.