The hard truth about the Andrew Broad scandal

I’m no stranger to disgrace, but even I’m blown away by the speed of the National MP’s downfall. Is what he did so shocking that it should have ended his career, asks Sam Dastyari.

So much for the silly season.

The time of year when things start to wind down has been anything but — for all sides of politics.

This week headquarters of the NSW Labor Party on Sussex Street were raided by ICAC, apparently seeking information about a 2015 fundraiser called Chinese Friends of Labor. I did’t attend. Didn’t know about the raid and haven’t worked for the Labor Party for over five years.

But still, when you put the words “China” and “Labor” together you get my mug doing my best Mr Bean impersonation so I got dragged into all the stories.

That’s now my lot in life; perhaps some day, I won’t hate myself for it.

Which is why I also have some sympathy for disgraced Nationals MP Andrew Broad, whose career fell apart this week in spectacular fashion.

You might have missed Andrew Broad’s career.

The Federal Member for Mallee in regional Victoria’s presence went from “irrelevant’ to “disgraced” and then “former member of parliament” at breathtaking speed.

From a guy you had never heard of, to someone you laughed about, to someone you forgot. All in 36 hours. That was it.

RELATED: Andrew Broad quits over ‘sugar baby’ scandal

Just a week ago, many Australians had never heard of Nationals MP Andrew Broad, but that’s all changed thanks to his ‘sugar baby’ scandal. His wife Rachel (pictured) is standing by him. Picture: Jason Edwards

Quite a feat for someone who, it would appear, couldn’t even organise a root from a dating app.

As a connoisseur of disgrace and failure, I was blown away by it. Is the idea that middle aged Australian politicians fornicate so repulsive that he had to be leave parliament?

The facts are this. Andrew Broad, a married man in his early forties, was using a legal dating app called “Sugar Baby” to try and meet women.

It was stupid. Definitely embarrassing.

But did he misuse his position as a politician? Did he abuse his allowances?

The evidence just isn’t there.

His wife is sticking by him — and the fact is, it’s a matter for them.

Sure, he deserves to be ridiculed for his Christian hypocrisy — and the voters should have their say on that at an election, though they will be denied the opportunity — but is what he did so earth shatteringly shocking?

Since when is any of this anyone else’s business beyond a giggle and some bar room chatter?

The real crime, as far as I’m concerned, was his ham-fisted attempts of seduction.

You can argue that anyone who would text “I’m an Aussie lad, I know how to ride a horse, fly a plane and f**k my woman” shouldn’t be in federal parliament.

Perhaps even worse was his dirty talk. “I pull you close, run my strong hands down your back, softly kiss your neck and whisper ‘G’day mate’.”

Hilarious, but is it sackable?

Are his actions worse than Barnaby Joyce’s?

I’d argue nowhere near as bad. In the Joyce affair there were questions over allowances, the creation of jobs and the use of his position in power.

Barnaby Joyce had an affair, and child, with staffer Vikki Campion. Picture Gary Ramage

And it looks like Barnaby might be leader of the National Party again soon.

RELATED: Barnaby Joyce is ready to pounce

Think about it: the Berejiklian government has bungled a light rail project so comprehensively that the state will be lucky to get away with just another half a billion dollar fix.

And that’s apparently just fine, as long as we don’t have to think of anyone involved having sex.

The Immigration Minister (Peter Dutton) can’t explain what the deal is with the au pairs. The Assistant Treasurer (Stuart Roberts) is charging for community forums.

And Michaelia Cash is still in hiding over the issue of leaking of the Australian Workers’ Union office raid.

All of which is apparently perfectly acceptable because they had the decency to keep their pants on.

And Andrew Broad? Well apparently he has to go.

The New Idea story about Andrew Broad included quotes from a woman named Amy, who uses the pseudonym “Sweet Sophia Rose”.

I’m not defending his private life. I’m making the point that it is HIS private life. Online chatter on why he had to resign focused on the issues surrounding toxic masculinity. A real issue in parliament, but this isn’t an example of that.

This is a pathetically sad affair.

New Idea (which broke the story) thought so little of it they didn’t even make a reference to it on their front cover. And if you ever read New Idea you would know they have up to a dozen stories on their front. But he was still drummed out of parliament.

Here is the hard truth no one likes to think about: even ugly middle aged politicians have sex.

In fact, I suspect that aside from the Playboy mansion, no workplace has had more fornication in it than Australian Parliament House.

A lot of people, far away from home, in some pretty messed up relationships. Hence Malcolm Turnbull’s much ridiculed “bonk ban”.

RELATED: Bonk ban is, well, bonkers

I could be wrong. Andrew Broad might have done something and misused his position. If so, he should be out of parliament. But bowing out because of ‘sugar baby’, oh boy. What a way to go.

It will haunt him now forever. He will always be the “sugar baby” guy. You will forget. A week from now you won’t remember his him. (name?)

You will move on. But he won’t. Andrew will always be haunted by it. If nowhere else than certainly in his head.

The fact is, he wasn’t a bad bloke. If you ever see him on the streets make sure you say hello. Actually, go one better. Pull him close and whisper, “G’day mate”.

I’m sure he will appreciate it.

@samdastyari