The All New Monty showed us more than just bodies
Channel 7’s All New Monty threw the spotlight on eight naked celebrities — but what it revealed about their vulnerabilities and body image anxieties was even better, writes David Mills.
When it comes to hitting the change room after a workout, male gym-goers can be divided into one of three main categories.
First there are those men who just grab their bag and go, preferring to shower and change at home. Then there are those who discreetly change under their towel, doing an elaborate little dance as they change their underwear. The third and final group simply drop their towel and nude up while changing. And this final demographic can be divided into two subcategories: (a) those who do so quickly and without fuss; and (b), those who take their sweet time about it.
Personally, I’m a category three, subcategory (a) kind of guy, most of the time. The mechanics of getting changed under a towel are usually awkward, but more to the point, I’ve always thought the guys who do it that way look a bit precious, as if they’re just a bit too anxious about their body and fear the idea that somebody might glimpse it naked, even just for a second.
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The guys in subcategory (b), who take their time in the nude while getting changed, can be divided into two sub-sub categories (this is getting ridiculous, I know — but bear with me). There are the show-offs: the guys blessed with great bodies in the first place, and those who have made their bodies great via long sweaty hours working out. And last and best of all are the guys who are just profoundly indifferent to what anyone else would happen to think of what they look like naked. They’re comfortable being nude because they just don’t give a s--t what anyone is thinking.
These men are true legends.
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And so to The All New Monty on Channel 7, which features eight celebrities of different ages, body types and confidence levels stripping for a live audience.
Prior to the show airing, Matty J (one of the celebrities who stripped) told Andrew Bucklow from news.com.au that the footy players involved (George Burgess, Lote Tuqiri, Robert DiPierdomenico and Brendan Fevola) were “extremely comfortable being naked in front of each other because they said that a lot of their time was spent in a locker room chatting naked”.
He also revealed that Burgess had shared a naked photo of himself on a private WhatsApp group involving the participants “as a way of breaking the ice”.
Anybody who saw the nude photos of Burgess that leaked online in 2015 could be forgiven for assuming he wouldn’t be too anxious about going naked in public — although who really knows?
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Veteran actor John Wood did however seem quite nervous before the strip, telling the viewers: “If you’re looking for a fire hose, don’t look at me.”
But hats off to the Gold Logie winner for casting the nerves aside and putting it all out there.
“The actual strip was really quite exhilarating,” Wood told the Herald Sun’s Nui Te Koha after filming. “I’ve never been in an auditorium that made that much noise. I didn’t even notice that, at the end, I didn’t have any clothes on.”
Of course, seeing the celebrities without any clothes on was what most viewers tuned in for, but what was interesting and refreshing about The All New Monty was that we got to see some of their vulnerabilities as well.
Fevola was candid and funny when he said of himself: “I’m a big fat block of flats, and if I was green I’d look like Shrek”. And former Yellow Wiggle Sam Moran was genuinely moving when he described his battle with depression.
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Like a real striptease, the show was a bit drawn out — the repeated suggestion that host Shane Jacobson might end up stripping again (he participated in the event last year) was tedious from the very first mention, and we could have done away with the Sunrise cash-cow auditioning.
But the show was overall quite funny and sweet, with the clever and surprisingly moving message for male viewers that conquering body anxiety could save your life.
(Messages about getting yourself tested for prostate and testicular cancer were repeated throughout the show, including at the moment of the strip itself.)
If you’ve got a man in your life, it’s a good message to remind him of — especially if he’s one of those guys who changes under his towel at the gym.
David Mills is a journalist with News Corp Australia.
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