Done and dusted, that’s the way to take the crown

The best party is a quick one, and the same goes for a coronation. The Danes are in, out, done and dusted – that’s my kind of event, writes Kerry Parnell.

King Charles could take a few tips from the Danish Coronation – not least, its speed.

Not for King Frederik and Queen Mary, hours and hours of solemn oath-making, anointing and donning the Supertunica (although who wouldn’t want to wear a Super Tunic?), followed by a laborious procession home.

No, the Danes are in, out, done and dusted, in a matter of minutes. That’s my kind of event. The best party is a quick one, for me – arrive, wave, chat and carriage home. If only I had a butler waiting with my slippers and cocoa, it would be perfect.

Much was made of Charles’ more modern Coronation last May – he was going to slim and trim, we were told. And he did – he invited 6000 fewer guests than his mother did in 1953 and cut the ceremony down from three hours to one.

Which is all very well, until the Danes came along and showed everyone how to do it. No slim and trim for them, rather a Viking slash and burn, leaving Charles, who for decades has positioned himself as the great royal reformer, looking a tad old-fashioned.

He spent so long as King-in-Waiting, much was made of his plans to modernise the Royal Family when he inevitably did get in power. “He knows that the monarchy has survived by adapting and he freely acknowledges that his monarchy would be different,” said his biographer Jonathan Dimbleby.

King Charles III after his coronation.

But having been on the throne 16 months, I’m surprised how few changes he’s made. Either he’s a bit tired, or has discovered the job isn’t as straightforward as it seemed from the outside and is tangled in red tape.

Either way, it’s time for the newish monarch to show his hand and implement many of his promised changes, from updating the residences to redistributing the royal warrants. Look, it’s imperative we find out if Quaker Oats still has the nod, or we’ll need to look elsewhere for our breakfast needs.

Prince Andrew should be “persuaded” to live a private life somewhere other than the 30-room Royal Lodge in Windsor and a clear plan announced for many of the other palaces and residences.

It had been mooted Buckingham Palace, for example, would be opened to the public all year round and Balmoral Castle might be turned into a museum to Queen Elizabeth II.

While I’m all for tradition and don’t want to see coronation ceremonies dismantled completely, I do think it’s time for Charles to look to the future.

There’s no law that says there has to be an actual Coronation – only the Coronation Oath Act which expects there is one. The last King William (IV) had to be forced to have one at all, in 1831, and he cut it down so much it was dubbed “the penny Coronation”.

By the time it’s Prince William’s turn, whenever that is, I’m certain he’ll view the lengthy, lavish proceedings as somewhat anachronistic.

They need to start making future-proof plans and when they do, I know just who to ask for advice.