Five reasons to keep border shut even when Qld wants it open

We all know you can tell a Queenslander by their shiny, white sandshoes and the way they can’t negotiate roundabouts

Main Beach, Byron Bay. Photo Jerad Williams / The Northern Star

During the COVID-19 pandemic, Queensland has treated people on the Northern Rivers like we are lepers begging for a bowl of rice.

They have shut us out and treated us like we are dirty, mean and mighty unclean.

It's high time the people of NSW treated them with the disdain they deserve if and when Anna P finally decides to reopen the border.

Bugger them if they want to get into their ritzy off road vehicle (which has never been off-road) and drive down the Pacific Highway.

Time to fester in your own state.

NSW should put up the 'not welcome' sign.

After all, they have far more COVID cases right now than the Northern Rivers has.

Go ahead and break away from the rest of Australia.

You can play State of Origin against Fiji for all we care.

Here's five reasons why NSW should keep the border closed even if Queensland decides to reopen it:

1: Parking has never been easier:

It was probably 1987 when you could last drive into Byron Bay on a Saturday night and get a park. Not only that, you can get a table at a restaurant and go to the beach and catch a wave without rubbing shoulders with drunken yobbos from the sunshine state.

2: The less shiny white sandshoes around, the better:

You can always spot the Queenslander by their shiny white sandshoes. It's always a risk coming to the rich red volcanic soils of the Northern Rivers with anything white on. Fashion faux pas No 1.

3: Thongs and socks are not OK:

At the other end of the spectrum you've got your Redneck Queenslanders taking up oodles of space in our campgrounds. Whenever they need to go to the amenties block they don the classic combo of thongs and socks. Fashion faux pas No 2.

 

A fashion statement popular with Queenslanders

 

4: We don't miss, near misses:

We all know Queenslanders are bad drivers. They indicate left and then lurch right, weave all over the roads, hog the middle of our hinterland highways and couldn't navigate a roundabout if their GPS depended on it.

5: We're dirty, mean and mighty unclean:

We may have been labelled as the great unwashed by Queenslanders, but last time we checked, there's no community transmission on the Northern Rivers. So Gladys B close our border to Queensland, even if your great mate Anna P decides to open it.