Sally Obermeder on life, death and second chances
PRESENTER, entrepreneur and mum-of-two Sally Obermeder says early lessons in humility — and later a masterclass in adversity — helped make her a success.
Stellar
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AS Sally Obermeder and her husband Marcus gazed at their longed-for second child for the first time, they couldn’t have been more elated.
In five short years they had dealt with IVF, breast cancer, miscarriage and the loss of Marcus’s mum. So when baby Elyssa was born via a surrogate in December 2016, it seemed life had finally smiled on them.
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Their eldest daughter, Annabelle, wasn’t as convinced. Having had her parents to herself for five years, she wasn’t impressed that a squawking, pooing, not very exciting baby was suddenly the centre of attention. Twenty months on, however, her little sister has grown on her, so much so that she’s ready for the family to grow again.
“She’s now asking for another baby,” says Obermeder, laughing as she grabs some rare free minutes to talk to Stellar between hosting afternoon television and taking Annabelle, six, to swimming lessons. “I could’ve fallen over,” she continues. “I reminded her that when Elyssa was first here she didn’t like having a baby around. But she said Elyssa was now heaps of fun — and she’d like a brother as well.”
As to whether she’ll get her wish, “I wouldn’t say no, I really wouldn’t,” says Obermeder, who turns 45 this week. “When you’re in the midst of that first year you’re so exhausted that you can’t imagine having another one, but then that passes and you think, ‘I feel great.’ So the door is still ajar — I could definitely entertain it [having another baby], but it’s not straightforward.”
Having been diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer the day before Annabelle was born in 2011, Obermeder was told she couldn’t carry another baby because pregnancy could cause the cancer to return. With commercial surrogacy illegal in Australia, she and Marcus found an “altruistic surrogate” in America but the process didn’t go smoothly. Their surrogate, Rachel, fell pregnant with one of the Obermeder’s frozen embryos, but then miscarried at 11 weeks. When Elyssa was finally born, in the middle of a freezing Milwaukee winter, it was the joyous culmination of a two-year struggle.
Even now, Obermeder still cries whenever she speaks to Rachel. “I think she thinks I’m a lunatic but I’m just so grateful to her. Every time I tuck the girls in at night I can’t believe how fortunate we’ve been. I never thought I would live long enough to see Annabelle grow up, let alone have another baby.”
Obermeder recently dressed Elyssa in a cute pink and white bunny suit that Annabelle had also worn as a toddler. Her older daughter wanted to see a picture of herself in the suit, and when Obermeder dug it out she gasped at the sight of herself, post-chemo, with barely any hair.
“It still takes my breath away,” she says pensively. “The further you get away from it, you start to forget — which you’re supposed to — but seeing those pictures, the rawness and the memories flooded back. Even though I’m grateful to be here and life is fine now, there’s no guarantee. Life can change in a second.”
While some of Obermeder’s drive and positive attitude can be attributed to overcoming illness, those qualities were ingrained far earlier. The businesswoman — who runs lifestyle brand Swiish with her sister, Maha Koraiem, and presents Seven Network’s The Daily Edition on weekday afternoons — has a determination which she believes stems from being “average”.
“At school I was nothing special. I was neither pretty, nor very smart, nor sporty, nor very anything. I would classify myself as quite forgettable,” Obermeder says. “I realised that if I wanted to be something, if I wanted to be proud of myself, then I would need to make that happen. I’m strong enough and it’s my responsibility to be my own cheerleader.”
She is certainly someone who makes things happen. In her 20s, stressed out and stuck in a finance job that she hated, Obermeder set about losing 37 kilos that had somehow crept on. Buoyed by her success, she doggedly pursued a career in television, practising her passion for healthy living on the side.
After recovering from cancer, she started making green smoothies in an effort to feel better, and eventually decided a book of recipes would help others. Publishers didn’t think it would be commercially viable so Obermeder and her sister published it themselves. It went gangbusters, got that publisher pick-up, and went on to sell more than 120,000 copies. The pair have had equal success with their frozen smoothie line, supergreen powders and “luxe for less” website, Swiish, where they will soon launch powders for sleep and collagen production.
Obermeder admits that she works hard — she is often up until midnight tending to the business — but she knows instinctively when she needs to devote more time to the children or to her relationship. She is refreshingly candid when she says marriage is hard and that she and Marcus have at times wondered if they will make it.
“But we’ve learnt not to point the finger,” she says. “Both of us are prepared to look at ourselves before we blame the other.”
As with everything she does, Obermeder takes what she calls a “chip, chip, chip” approach. “Sometimes it can feel like you’re dealing with the biggest mountain with the tiniest pick,” she tells Stellar. “But if you keep chipping away, you will get there. I do not give up. I just keep going.”