Sydney family-of-eight struggling to cope after mum’s heartbreaking diagnosis

“She was the backbone of our family, always doing everything, always held us together,” says dad-of-six Muddz.

It was two days before Mother’s Day when Pania Tarei’s world flipped upside down.

The mum-of-six had given birth to her twins Kyrie and Neveah less than a year before and was experiencing a sore back for months on end. 

Heading to the doctors for a scan, the medical team confirmed the worst. 

The Sydney mum was diagnosed with aggressive Stage 4 breast cancer and only had months to live. 

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The mum-of-six was given months to live. Source: Facebook

“Best mother ever” given only months to live

“By the time we had scans, it had spread to her liver and everywhere,” her husband, Michael “Mudzz” Tarei, told A Current Affair.

“It just felt like my whole world had just shattered.” 

Muddz and Pania share six children: Drake, 12, Denzel, nine, Boston, seven, Chanel, three; and twins Kyrie and Navaeh, 16 months. 

“She's amazing. Best mother ever. Best partner. She always puts other people before herself, and I'm just so grateful that I met her,” Muddz said. 

“She was the backbone of our family, always doing everything, always held us together.” 

In the months leading up to her diagnosis, Pania was complaining of a sore back but passed it off as a side effect of giving birth to the twins. 

“[We] didn't really think it was that bad until it got to a stage where she couldn't really walk properly and then ... yeah, confirmed probably my worst nightmare, really," he explained. 

Over the past six months, Pania’s condition has deteriorated; doctors have told her family this is likely their last Christmas together. 

“She’s not in a very good state. She can’t really do anything on her own,” he said, adding he is yet to tell their kids the truth of their mum’s condition.

“I’m trying to wait for when the time is right to tell them,” he said. “It’s going to be so hard.” 

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Doctors haven't given Pania much time. Source: Facebook

“There’s definitely challenging times ahead’

Doctors told Pania and Muddz they had two options for her final weeks. 

“They haven't given her much time,” he said. “They pretty much said she could have stayed in hospital, or she could have come home, and I just wanted her at home around the kids and around us.” 

Muddz, who works as a scaffolder, has temporarily stopped working to be there for his children and be his wife’s full-time carer. 

Without a steady income and the crushing cost of medical care, the Sydney family is struggling to cope. Their community and local rugby league club have banded together to raise funds for the family, collecting what they can to keep them afloat. 

The kids’ schools have also shown compassion to the family, offering to cover the cost of “whatever they need”, including their uniforms. “They've even told the kids they can get stuff from the canteen, you know, like for free, so they've been really helpful,” Muddz said. 

While the family is “kind of managing OK” with their finances “at the moment”, the Tarei family was met with another blow. “Recently, her Centrelink payments have stopped, I'm not sure why; I tried to contact them,” he told ACA. 

“It’s going to be hard trying to get all the little ones to school and trying to find the right job to suit the hours that I’m available. There’s definitely challenging times ahead.”

ACA has set up a fundraising appeal with the Australian Lions Foundation and has so far raised over $270,000 for the Tarei family.

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Originally published as Sydney family-of-eight struggling to cope after mum’s heartbreaking diagnosis