My husband bought himself a push present. Twice. But nothing for me

"I sobbed - it was so expensive. But he drove me to the store and made me sign for it," a devastated Sydney mum tells Kidspot.

I’ve never felt as vulnerable in my life as when I gave birth. Physically. Emotionally. There is just so much going on and it’s overwhelming.

It was in those early days of navigating the postpartum blues right after having my son that my husband decided to buy himself a push present: a brand-new TV.

We’d been discussing a new TV before our son’s arrival and I’d argued for the ‘no’ vote, as we couldn’t really afford one. 

Considering I wouldn’t be working for several months, I thought we should be prioritising other things over a home cinema experience. My husband thought otherwise. 

He’s self-employed, whereas I was on paid maternity leave then, so he drove me to The Good Guys to purchase a 55-inch Samsung curved TV for a cool $3000 on a 12-month interest-free arrangement.

I felt so out of it still from the horrendous natural birth I’d experienced that I didn’t really protest. I signed on the dotted line and we took home our new TV.

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Another baby, another TV 

When I had baby number two three years later, I came home from the hospital, and he had bought another push present. This time it was an LG 65-inch $900 television.

Months earlier, our three-year-old had thrown a toy car at the Samsung and cracked the edge of the screen. Again, we’d had conversations about whether to replace it and being the more frugal one in the relationship, I’d been against it because of our finances.

My husband went right ahead and did it while I was in hospital. 

I’ll never forget the feeling of hurt when I walked through the door with our new baby in my arms and saw the sparkly new television on the wall. 

There were no flowers for the wife who’d just had multiple layers of abdominals sliced open. No card saying thank you for our beautiful baby girl.

Mum heartbroken when husband buys himself a push present and not for her. Source: supplied

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"I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed"

I ran to the bathroom and locked myself in. I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. I was inconsolable. 

By that point, we’d been together for about 13 years, and I think that was the lowest point in our relationship.

When I emerged from the bathroom, my husband knew he had made a terrible error in judgement. He quickly shot off to the shops and bought me a bunch of flowers, but the damage had already been done.

I carried that hurt for a long time, and even today my heart still aches to think of it. I’ve never been materialistic or high-maintenance. I don’t spend money on monthly facials or fancy clothes. 

In fact, I don’t ask for much, but when I’ve just delivered a baby, I think a bunch of flowers and some kind words are in order.

When baby number three arrived, my husband knew not to make the same mistake again. When they wheeled me to the maternity ward, he presented me with an enormous bunch of flowers and a card saying, “Thank you for giving me another beautiful little lady to love.” I still carry that card around with me in my wallet.

They say you need to communicate clearly and set your standards in a healthy relationship. My husband got there in the end, it just took a little training. 

This story was originally published in January 2024 and has since been updated. 

Originally published as My husband bought himself a push present. Twice. But nothing for me