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If you want to see my daughter again, you need to pierce your nose

"She is now missing an earlobe, and it's because of them," the mum angrily writes. 

I pierced my baby ears and it was worth it

The debate over the age at which a baby "should" have their ears pierced can get heated. Although it's a tradition in certain cultures, the decision ultimately rests with the parents and no one else. 

But that doesn't always happen.

This week, we've learned of this story: what started as an innocent birthday gift from grandma and grandpa on a trip to seeing them, ended with a baby having her ears pierced without her parents' permission. 

 "My parents got my daughter earrings for her birthday. Her ears are not pierced, and she is only one. I told them that I would save them for her until she was old enough to get her ears pierced," the mum begins in an online post. 

But the grandparents couldn't wait to see their granddaughter wearing the earrings they had bought her, so they took matters into their own hands. 

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RELATED: I got my baby’s ears pierced – it was worth her screaming

"We left my daughter with my parents while we met some friends. When we went to pick her up, mum showed us they had taken her to get her ears pierced," she writes, horrified. 

"I am furious. My husband said that my parents are not allowed to spend time alone with my daughter ever again. I went farther. I said that I would not be bringing her, or any other kids we might have, down here to see my parents again," she continues. 

"On the way home, my parents called me to see when we were coming again. I ignored all the calls and texts until we were back home. We took a few days to think things over and cool down."

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"We came up with a compromise"

After the parents had regained their composure, they were ready to talk to her parents. They offered them an ultimatum if they wanted to see their granddaughter again.

"I talked with my husband and we came up with a compromise. We agreed that we would resume visits with them, but not alone time - and only if they both got their noses pierced.

"They said that we are being stupid and that they will not do that. I said no problem and hung up."

A toddler had her ears pierced without her parents' consent. Source: supplied
A toddler had her ears pierced without her parents' consent. Source: supplied

Thousands of users came to the parents' defence, shocked and appalled by the grandparents' lack of boundaries. 

"They were willing to do (semi)permanent damage to your baby directly against your wishes just because they want to decorate the baby. It displays a lack of respect for you and your child," one user wrote. 

"Half of being a mature adult is accepting accountability when you're wrong. It's so easy. And the higher the stakes - say, for example, whether or not you're allowed to have a relationship with your own adult child and their family - the easier it should be to admit that you crossed a line. But nope, parents would rather be righteous than happy," another shared. 

One bluntly said, "Your child = your rules!"

And this person added: "They are abusive."

Unexpectedly, one individual condemned the parents for their abrupt departure and severing family ties.

"Excellent. Let's continue toxic family dynamics. That will definitely improve the situation, especially when the little girl finds out that she doesn't know her grandparents because (GASP) they pierced her ears," one criticised. 

"Currently, it might be that she does not know them because she is missing her earlobe," the OP clapped back. 

Originally published as If you want to see my daughter again, you need to pierce your nose

Original URL: https://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/if-you-want-to-see-my-daughter-again-you-need-to-pierce-your-nose/news-story/cc20aa28ca9b7c6216b41d26ba6efba1