Olympian Leisel Jones sheds light on terrifying suicide moment

Olympian Leisel Jones didn’t see a psychologist as a teen because seeking help was for “weak athletes”. Now, after a years long mental health struggle she’s shining a light on the issue.

A tearful Leisel Jones has recounted the terrifying moment she contemplated suicide and how 14 years later she is still working on her mental health.

One of Australia’s most decorated Olympians — a swimming sensation whose career started as a teen at the Sydney Games in 2000 — Jones broke down while detailing her battle at the Albury Wodonga Winter Solstice on Saturday night.

“I’d really like to talk about the hope and the light at the end of the tunnel,’’ Jones said.

“And I distinctly remember sitting down with my psychologist after 2011 when I had contemplated taking my own life. I remember Lisa saying to me, she said there is light at the end of the tunnel. I was like, who bloody blew it out because I can’t see it, and I just feel like it’s never getting any closer, but extraordinarily it does. And that light will always be there, but you just have to find it, and sometimes you do have to light it yourself.

“It’s a lot of hard work. You do have to work through it, but the first thing is recognising that you may have a problem and that you may want to work through it. It is incredibly brave to go and seek help. I personally, I’ve got a mental health care plan. I’m about to start with a psychologist on Tuesday. It’s all about taking that first step, getting in there, really digging deep. It’s gritty, it’s awful, and it sometimes feel like it’s a waste of time. But trust me, it’s so worth it, because there is hope out there.”

Olympian Leisel Jones says she was denied access to mental health help at 14 because athletes who saw psychologist were considered ‘weak’.

Jones said she moved to the Gold Coast from Brisbane six months ago and had “felt incredibly lonely” as she’s struggled to find her community.

She detailed how in 2011 during a training camp in Spain she was saved when an unnamed coach knocked on her door.

After a glittering career, claiming three gold medals and nine overall, she said she failed to identify she was struggling.

“I would do everything for my body, day in and day out, but I did nothing for my mind,’’ she said.

“I did not care for my mental health whatsoever, because it was completely neglected and was not important, and even as a youngster, when I was coming up, I was told that we were not allowed to use psychologists, because psychologists were for weak athletes.

“So I was denied access to a psychologist as a 14 year-old girl who was going to her first Olympic Games. And that was devastating to me, because I really could have benefited talking about mental health, because I did not believe I was a weak athlete. I believed I was very strong, but I just did not have that connection with strong mental health and a strong body. So that internal connection between mind and body is so important.”

Originally published as Olympian Leisel Jones sheds light on terrifying suicide moment