The Mouth: Why do restaurants insist on two hour dining windows?

Trendy restaurants are turning tables and turning off customers, but if you turn your tastes east rather than to the eastern suburbs you can still find old-fashioned hospitality, writes The Mouth.

So there we were, all settled in for a good long lunch at a local celebrity chef’s hot new ticket.

The chef’s name isn’t important – let’s just call him Teal Sherry, for argument’s sake – nor is the name of his restaurant, but to pluck a name out of the air let’s just call it … Thatcher.

Anyway, there we were at Teal Sherry’s new celebrity haunt, Thatcher, having taken our table at 2:30 and figuring we could stay on the wines and people-watching the botox’ed and collagen’ed until dinner when, obviously, they’d want the table back. Alas, no: The Pumpkin Hour in Sydney is no longer midnight nor even, for the lunch bunch, 6:30, but 4:15pm.

That was the time one of Sherry’s people came over and with the sweetest dose of corporate “just a gentle reminder about your bill” passive aggression told us they were calling last drinks if we wanted anything else from the bar, and could we please settle up and GTFO. Sigh. Righty-ho.

This, of course, is not the first time this has happened to this column; a couple of months ago we were told to take our desserts to the bar when another otherwise fantastic Italian CBD steakhouse that rhymes with Piss-Takeh wanted our table back.

Is the long lunch dead? We hope not. Alpa Bhattacharjee and Camilla Boekeman enjoying The Long Lunch on George Street in Sydney’s CBD. Picture: Justin Lloyd

Now, we get that Covid did a number on the restaurant business and owners and operators have our sympathy. But it does feel like a symptom of long Covid afflicting the business that too many people have forgotten the meaning of the word “hospitality”.

Which is not only a shame but worrying, because every great culture worth its salt puts hospitality front and centre and says turning people out onto the street is a grave offence. Yet the Old Testament reminder to never fail to entertain strangers (for in doing so some have entertained angels) seems to have been forgotten by restaurateurs who reckon even angels can overstay their welcome.

Yum Cha at Palace Chinese in Sydney's CBD.

Trendy restaurants may forgo hospitality, but all is not lost. Picture: David Swift

At a time when, bigger picture, things are looking a bit shaky all this feels like a worrying leading indicator.

All is not lost, however, and there are refuges for the lost.

On Sunday this column, mostly by accident but that’s another story, wound up camping for four hours at Palace Chinese in the city, hammering Tsingtaos and prawn toast and all sorts of dumplings.

While the trolley drivers were entertainingly barky and brusque, there was never a moment’s consideration that we might be turfed even as neighbouring tables turned twice and then three times.

This is, also, the way it is at pretty much every yum cha hall across the nation, where you can still have a good long session without the attitude or price tag. In other words, hospitality.