Kyle Sandilands and Jackie O Henderson launch on Melbourne airwaves, declaring ‘national takeover’
Next, the nation, is the pledge from Kyle and Jackie O as their KIIS FM radio show launched into Melbourne, complete with minor technical glitches and many ‘not safe for work’ intros.
Confidential
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Kyle Sandilands and Jackie ‘O’ Henderson have officially launched their breakfast show in the Melbourne market all ‘grubby’ guns blazing.
Debuting on Monday morning, the powerhouse radio duo’s first program outside of Sydney hit a speed bump shortly after 9am.
After about 20 seconds of dead air and a jerky cut out of 2010 song Teenage Dream by Katy Perry saw Sandilands and Henderson suddenly talking.
When three traffic reports were delivered inside a 15-minute window suggested a technical error was at play.
After being contacted by Confidential, ARN confirmed that the Kyle & Jackie O Show did experience “a small technical glitch … which isn’t uncommon during a live radio broadcast”.
“It’s the day of the revolution. The beginning of the 20 year dream of going national, one city at a time,” Sandilands said.
‘KJ’ were true to form in their introductions, leaving little the imagination from the early hour of 6am.
“It’s a big day for us today,” Sandilands said. “The first reason, it’s my wedding anniversary. Can you believe it was a year ago?”
“If you’ve never listened before: Hi, I’m Jackie and it takes me ages to connect dots, it’s one of the reasons my marriage broke up,” Henderson said.
Adding, that she doesn’t like anal sex and, according to Sandilands, has kept her “p***y pristine” and is STI free.
“I’m a fuel guzzling ex F-boy, coke-sniffing ass***e, that’s what I am,’’ Sandilands boasted.
Last week the radio wars heated up when Melbourne’s top-rating FM radio breakfast show, Fox FM’s Fifi, Fev and Nick, announced it had jacked up the prize for its “secret sound” competition to $150,000.
Sandilands wanted to go one better and raised their secret sound prize to $200,000.
They introduced their staff, and it only took a few minutes for Sandilands to mention their homosexual newsreader Brooklyn used to be a “gay whore” and is “a woke piece of sh*t”.
The show’s chief content director Bruno Bouchet, also Sandilands’ manager, told listeners he’s got a “freakishly long French foreskin”.
“Did you grow the beard to join the pro-Palestine movement,’’ Sandilands asked.
Simpson is a gay man, “but you rooted your female cousin” Sandilands said, with the next few sentences beeped out.
Little Alfie, the show’s coffee maker, said he “got car head” from a girl because he told her he works on the show.
The sex life of Lachie the Geek, the Melbourne correspondent, was explored while another staffer, Pedro, had been appointed because he was “the best person for the job, not just a black lesbian” and “he’s got a tiny penis”, Sandilands told listeners.
They also spoke to Intern Pete who’s a “scam artist” while Ella, who runs social media, was quizzed about masturbating and her preference not to “suck d**k”.
Sandilands said he’s proud of the diversity of his staff.
The advertising slogan for Kyle and Jackie’s “national takeover” — of which Melbourne is the first stepping stone (or pillar to fall) — is ‘Make Up Your Own Mind’.
By 8am we also knew that Sandilands and Henderson weren’t fans of spitting on partners.
“It’s not romantic,’’ Sandilands said.
“Welcome to KIIS FM,’’ they said.
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