Seven miscarriages in 15 months: Mum’s heartbreaking fight for baby

A Queensland mum has opened up about her never-ending cycle of hope, anxiety and despair - suffering seven miscarriages in 15 months during a gruelling fertility journey to make sure her only son is not left alone in the world.

Trying for a baby is immense for most, but for Ipswich woman Kacie Evans who suffered seven miscarriages in 15 months, the experience has been a never-ending cycle of hope, anxiety and despair.

Ms Evans, 40, has secondary infertility and has endured many miscarriages since her first and only son was born in 2017.

The last seven of her pregnancies have ended after six to 12 weeks, her most recent loss in February.

Ms Evans has experienced seven miscarriages on her IVF journey to a second child. Picture John Gass

The East Ipswich mum has also had to undergo eight surgeries related to infertility and has developed a permanent bladder disease from repeated fertility steroid treatment and repeated fertility surgeries.

She was diagnosed with complex PTSD in six months ago as a result from the trauma of ongoing pregnancy loss.

“I get the question ‘why are you still trying?’ or the statement ‘you should be grateful you already have (a child)’,” Ms Evans said.

“But I actually don’t have family, and my husband’s family is very elderly.

“If something happened to me or my husband … The thought of my son being alone in the world eats my soul daily.”

Ms Evans said miscarriage was an isolating and lonely experience, particularly as many experience it in their first three months of pregnancy.

“There’s an unspoken rule you’re not to tell anyone you’re pregnant in the first trimester,” she said.

“I understand that to an extent, but what subsequently ends up happening is when you do miscarry, it’s really lonely because nobody knew you were pregnant.”

Determined to break down the stigma that surrounds miscarriages so other women might feel more comfortable, Ms Evans wanted to speak out about her devastating experiences.

Ipswich mum Kacie Evans has fought since 2019 to give her son Harry a sibling. Picture: Supplied

Her own journey to have her second child has involved nightmares, poor sleep, and “horrendous” flashbacks, leading to a “culmination of trauma” and a complex PTSD diagnosis.

But it has also been full of hope.

“When you’re going through fertility treatment, your desire for this one to work is so strong, you just keep going month after month,” Ms Evans said.

“It’s not until you stop, that this wave of what’s happened catches up with you.”

Ms Evans said she has one embryo left from her IVF treatment, but she is taking a moment to breathe following her bladder disease diagnosis before she goes through with the transfer next month.

Although there is only a two per cent chance of the transfer being successful, she said she would rather try again than give up while there was still hope.

Ms Evans hopes her own story will help to destigmatise pregnancy loss, trauma, and mental ill health. Picture John Gass

Ms Evans and her husband Jarratt are now considering adoption as a means to grow their family.

“Through therapy, I’m at peace with not having another biological child,” Ms Evans said.

Her advice to others who have been, or are currently, in the throes of infertility is: “While you probably feel incredibly alone, you’re not. Reach out to someone you trust. You’re stronger than you think you are, and it’s never your fault.”

To those who want to support a person experiencing a miscarriage, she suggested simply acknowledging their loss, as that is all she wanted from others throughout her own miscarriages.

Kacie Evans, her husband Jarratt and their son Harry. Picture: Supplied

“You don’t have to fix it, because there’s nothing that can justify or fix a loss,” she said.

Last month, to raise awareness for miscarriage and the PTSD that can result from it, Ms Evans ran 100 kilometres from Ipswich to the Gold Coast over six days.

She said that while it “nearly killed” her, she felt it was important to bring attention to an often silent, but incredibly common, experience among women.

Ms Evans now hopes to start an annual fun run for infertility and pregnancy loss that will direct more funding and attention to the cause.

To support Ms Evans’ goal to help others heal, donate here.

If this story has raised issues for you, help is available at:

• Lifeline on 13 11 14 for free counselling and support
• 13 HEALTH on 13 43 25 84 for general health information and referrals
• Sands on 1300 072 637 if you have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth or newborn death and want to speak to someone who understands
• The Compassionate Friends on 1300 064 068 for parents, siblings, and grandparents needing support after the death of a child