Edwina Bartholomew: Why my husband and I had to separate to keep our love alive

Sunrise star Edwina Bartholomew has revealed she made a difficult decision seven years ago — and how it led to a happy marriage and two kids.

I’m counting down to Valentine’s Day on Tuesday. My husband and I have big plans. Red roses? Poetry? A candlelit dinner?

No, we will be spending the evening sleeping in separate beds, as we do every night. I’m convinced it’s the secret to our happy marriage (and clearly hasn’t impacted our ability to produce two kids).

It shocks people when they come to our house and see two rooms set up. One for me with a pinkish bedspread, big wardrobe and piles of magazine and books.

One set up for my husband with his gym gear and other “manly” stuff. My room is always messy. His is always neat. He is a bed-maker. I am not. He puts his clothes away. I like to file mine away on top of a chair in case I need them again.

It’s been this way for about seven years.

I’m a fantastic sleeper and he tosses and turns. When I would get up for work, he would struggle to get back to sleep so we decided to trial separate rooms. When we had kids, it continued. I would sleep overnight with the baby in my room and then he would wake up early to take over. Ten years into our relationship and five years into our marriage, it works a charm.

Edwina Bartholomew and husband Neil Varcoe pictured at their wedding. Picture: Edwina Robertson

If that’s the secret to our marriage, I’d love to know the secret to yours. “Never go to bed angry”, is my mum’s advice and thankfully dad’s too.

I wonder what words J-Lo and Ben Affleck live by?

Six months after their Vegas wedding, there were snapped at the Grammys this week snapping at each other. Ben’s grumpy demeanour has captured the imagination of the internet.

Hilarious to us, not so funny to Mrs Affleck evidently.

Jay-Z and Beyoncé also showed themselves to be a typical couple. Well, as typical as two superstars can be. Clearly sick of waiting for Queen B to finish getting ready, Jay-Z headed to the Grammys and sat in his allocated spot while she was still stuck in traffic. Maybe separate cars is their version of separate beds.

Whatever you are doing (or perhaps whomever!) this Valentine’s Day, I hope you feel the love. And if that bunch of roses is not forthcoming, “Buy yourself flowers”, as Miley Cyrus sings and put them next to your very own bed.

Originally published as Edwina Bartholomew: Why my husband and I had to separate to keep our love alive