‘Not everyone can control young children’: Top chef opens up on fine dining with kids
Thinking about taking your kids with you to a fancy restaurant? This horror story might turn you off.
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Dining out with kids isn’t a simple recipe. It’s a smorgasbord of possibilities. Some nights, they’re captivated by the experience, munching happily, trying new foods and you leave the restaurant beaming. Other nights, you’re one tantrum away from staging a swift escape before things go nuclear.
When I became a mum, visions of quiet, family-friendly dinners filled my imagination with my little ones experiencing flavours and learning the art of dining out, but reality hits hard. As a (now) well-seasoned mum, cook and a very passionate restaurant enthusiast, I know the drill all too well. The reality often involves snacks, strategic distractions, and some very creative negotiations.
Early on, I was perhaps far too ambitious. I attempted a degustation dinner with my then three and one-year-old. Call it baby brain, call me brave, call me foolish, I thought it would be a grand idea on a weekend trip with the family to the Sunshine Coast that we book into the beautiful Humble on Duke at Sunshine Beach for dinner, hoping the kids would be, well … not be kids!
I felt I was prepared, rang ahead of time, spoke with the wonderful owners, Jade and Stacey, explaining we were on holidays, no babysitter, could we get a 5pm booking and is it OK to bring the kids? They couldn’t have been more accommodating. They even promised a few little tasters to keep the kids entertained.
At first, it was magical. The kids loved the mini dishes, the hubby and I felt like we’d unlocked the secret to dining out with toddlers. My blind belief that “we can do this” was little by little extinguished as we sat there attempting to eat and drink (some of the most delicious food by the way!) while balancing kids on our laps, hauling them in and out of highchairs and taking them to “dance on the deck”.
As time ticked by, my hubby and I were sharing that familiar look of parental panic, the unspoken “we’re never doing this again” look. By the end of two hours, we were both exhausted and slightly traumatised. I think my husband still shudders whenever he hears “degustation” within earshot of our two kids.
Adam Wolfers, Group Chef of Anyday Hospitality, has seen his fair share of families attempting to dine with young kids. He recalls a famous chef who often brought his energetic family to Monopole in Sydney, back before Adam had kids himself.
According to Adam, these kids were a whirlwind, dashing into the kitchen, scaling walls, and even moments that “spilled out the sides”.
Watching a highly disciplined chef try to keep up with his own children’s antics gave Adam an eye-opening look into parenting.
“Not everyone can control young children at a restaurant,” he tells me, adding “kids sometimes will have unpredictable ways of their own.”
There are different types of restaurant parents – those who treat dining out like a free-for-all and others running a tighter ship than the kitchen itself.
Then there’s the dream team of parents who, as Adam puts it, “take the time to teach their kids about the restaurant, practising manners, and even coming up to thank the chef at the end of the meal”.
I’ve definitely been all of the above. I like to think mostly the latter and really immersing myself into the dining experience with my kids and as they get older it is definitely getting easier, but there will still always be the endless (and always out of sync) wee and poop toilet trips – what is it with kids and thinking public toilets are a fun novelty!
So after all that, here are some hard-earned tips to make your next meal out a little easier. Pick a lively spot with plenty of noise. Trying to keep kids quiet in a quiet, intimate restaurant is like sneaking a bull into a china shop.
Opt for an early seating, and always pack snacks in case meals are delayed or your kids decide they’re not eating anything. Don’t forget colouring books (skip the markers and stickers).
While soft drinks might seem like a treat, they’re not great if you want your kids to sit still. I’ve found soda water with a splash of raspberry cordial is a great alternative.
Can we please start adding playgrounds to Mexican restaurants rather than Maccas? I’m all in for tacos and margaritas while watching the kids play. If you find a place with great food and a play area, share the secret!
Adam reflects with me on his experience from Japan, where he and his wife would prep their kids with videos and photos of dining etiquette before going out. This helped them feel more involved in the experience.
As Adam puts it, “kids can be messy, noisy, and unpredictable, but they bring a fun energy to a restaurant”.
So, even when things go sideways, those moments often turn into the best memories – just maybe not in the moments of chaos.