Anzac Day Brisbane 2020: How Legacy rebuilt a heartbroken family

Brisbane teenager William Beckwith can’t remember ever feeling happy between the ages of four and 12. Then his heartbroken family discovered Legacy Australia, and life without their husband and father became just a little bit easier.

William Beckwith, with his coy grin and quirky sense of humour, seems every inch the typical 17-year-old.

He’ll tell you how his first grade 12 maths exam last week was “a real kick in the nuts”. He took it at his Warner home during the global COVID-19 pandemic.

He’ll also tell you his plan to take a gap year when he graduates from Padua College in December so he can “get a bit of finance and enjoy a bit of freedom” before pursuing a career in the police force.

But William’s story isn’t that of a typical 17-year-old boy and that infectious grin is only a relatively new feature.

William’s dad, Peter, died in 2007 when William was only four, six years after being diagnosed with a brain tumour.

Peter Beckwith with son William, 4, in 2007. Picture: supplied

The navy man who served on HMAS Newcastle, HMAS Cerberus on Victoria’s Mornington Peninsula and in East Timor, was only 29.

“Him passing, I think my brain has locked that away,” William says. “I remember just being angry all the time. I don’t remember being happy from ages four to 12. It’s a bit rough.”

For William’s mum, Rebecca, 43, Peter’s death was earth-shattering coming only seven months after they’d welcomed their second child, William’s little sister Ella, now 13.

Rebecca says she had no idea how to get through her days without the “tall, dark and handsome” sailor she met at the Woolloomooloo Bay Hotel in 1998 and married in 2001.

Only now, 13 years after losing him, does she reflect on the loss with some lightness.

“When you see my kids you’ll know what Peter looked like because I didn’t get a look in at all,” she laughs. “They are exactly like their father and it’s lovely to look at them and see him.”

William and Ella Beckwith. Photo: AAP/Russell Shakespeare

She shares the excitement her and Peter felt when they found out she was pregnant with William. Even though they knew by then that Peter had an apple-sized tumour on his temporal lobe, the prospect of becoming parents had put a spring back into their step.

“We were given a 50 per cent chance around then that Peter would live for 10 years,” Rebecca says.

“Peter had a couple of good years then. He was medically discharged from the navy and we were given a compassionate posting to Brisbane where my family was, so until the age of three he and William were always together. Then we decided to try for baby number two.”

Rebeccas was five months pregnant when “the good years” ended and a routine MRI found Peter’s tumour had grown. The options for treatment were limited.

He was four months into chemotherapy when Ella was born and three months later his health declined rapidly. He died four months later on August 11, 2007.

“People ask me how I got through it, but the thing is I really didn’t have a choice. It was quite literally one day at a time. William was old enough to know what was going on and I couldn’t shelter him from it,” Rebecca says, her voice now breaking as she chokes back a wave of emotion.

Rebecca and Peter Beckwith on their wedding day in 2001. Picture: supplied

“He was there. He saw it all. He probably took on more than he should have at that age.”

Standing ready to pull the Beckwith family from their grief, to lead them with empathy through the many dark years that followed and to embrace them when it was all too much were the members of Legacy, a charity that supports Australian Defence Force families after the death or injury of a spouse or parent.

Legacy’s youth camps gave William his first friends. In the wake of his dad’s death, he suffered bullying at school.

“Kids can be cruel,” Rebecca says.

“At school they would say to William ‘Your dad was weak, that’s why he died’. But at Legacy camp, all of the kids were in the same boat. It was the one group of kids where William wasn’t the kid whose dad died.”

William will turn 18 in September when he hopes to become a Legacy Youth Leader and help other children grieving the loss of a parent.

“They made me an honorary one at the last camp anyway,” he says.

“The kids are always asking me what we’re doing and where we’re going.”

Rebecca, who now works for Legacy, says the charity was also the best therapy she received in the wake of Peter’s death.

William wears his late dad Peter’s medals as he poses with a photo of him. Picture: AAP/Russell Shakespeare

“I didn’t laugh for months after Peter died so being introduced to all of the other widows and seeing there was light at the end of the tunnel gave me hope. I knew I could do this because she had, and she had, and she had.”

She says watching William heal through his involvement with Legacy gave her one of her proudest parenting moments so far. One night in particular lifted any fear she might have that losing his dad so young had damaged him forever.

It was the night William told his story at the Legacy Defence Charity Ball in 2016. He was 14 at the time and the youngest person ever to address the ball.

“When mum asked me if I wanted to do a speech for Legacy I just figured it would be to 10 people at a golf club,” William recalls.

“Then she had me dressed up in a fancy suit and I thought, ‘Hang on something doesn’t seem right here’. Then, we pull up at the Brisbane Convention & Exhibition Centre and I’m like, ‘Oh yeah this is a completely different box of frogs here’.”

There’s that sense of humour.

Many of you have heard us share William Beckwith's amazing journey with Legacy, but have you heard William tell the...

Posted by Legacy Brisbane on Thursday, 17 August 2017

“When I got up on stage I felt a bit shaky in the legs but it was awesome. I basically just said hello, this is me, this is what happened to me, and this is what legacy did to help,” William says.

He got a standing ovation, the first Rebecca has ever seen at the black tie event.

“I realised then that he was going to be all right,” she says.

“We have Legacy to thank for that and for any Defence families going through hard times I would definitely recommend they reach out. It will change your life.”

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