Your night in: Weekend movie guide
You don’t need a mask to enjoy tonight’s line up of movies on free-to-air TV. Let us help you pick a movie for your lockdown night in on the couch.
Leigh Paatsch
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THE ANGRY BIRDS MOVIE (G)
*1/2
SUN 7.00PM GO!
There was a year or so where it seemed like the whole world was playing Angry Birds. But that was about a decade ago. Whereas you only needed a single finger to play the game, not one brain cell is required to process the movie adaptation. Grouchy, garrulous avians are gonna be fired willy-nilly at villainous green pigs. That’s just enough material for a winning 2-minute trailer. The other wincing 95 minutes on offer here are a rolling, rainbow-coloured snot-ball of lame jokes and laboured voice performances from cashing-in comedians. Like watching a Hummer moving through peak-hour traffic, it’s kind of sad how it can’t help but take up too much room, and waste too much time.
DIE HARD (M)
***1/2
SUN 8.30PM 7MATE
This prime dose of old-school Bruce Willis still holds its own. Armed with not much more than a singlet and his own hair, Brucey goes solo against a tribe of bad dudes inside the confines of a skyscraper and somehow reduces it to a level playing field. From the superb pacing through to the sarcastically sinister villainy of Alan Rickman, this remains a crucial template for the modern action film.
ALL IS LOST (PG)
****
SUN 8.30PM WORLD MOVIES
A man. The sea. No dialogue. Don’t be fooled by the micro-minimalist structure of All Is Lost. There is a big film in there just waiting to be discovered. The plotting is brutally basic. Somewhere in the middle of the Indian Ocean, a small boat is slowly sinking. The sole passenger aboard is a nameless fellow in his mid-seventies (Robert Redford). He looks as if he could be an experienced sailor. He had better be. Time is running out. The vessel is filling up. What will he do? Redford’s bravura performance is truly astonishing, with virtually every indication of his character’s emotional state suppressed with extraordinary control. Whenever Redford does briefly reveal how his character might be feeling, the connection he makes with the viewer is truly electric. This intensely challenging, yet serenely rewarding experience owes much to the shrewdly intuitive scripting and direction of J.C. Chandor. Amazingly, this was only his second feature. (The first, the financial drama Margin Call, is radically different, but equally impressive.)
FAST & FURIOUS 7 (PG)
**1/2
SUN 8.55PM GO!
You can safely take your time finishing your ironing or that Zoom call with your nanna before you park yourself in front of Fast & Furious 7. The first half-hour is as horribly hackneyed as this famously fuel-injected franchise has ever been. However, after that, the movie swiftly begins earning its keep. The F&F effect pays its way by pinning everything on audaciously ridiculous and irresistibly adrenalised set-piece stunt sequences, and this one ups the ante in all the best ways. Two extended scenes set at high altitudes disobey all laws of velocity, geometry and air-traffic control so flagrantly, you just won’t be able to wipe the dopey grin off your face. The rest is tosh, save for a touching tribute to the late Paul Walker at the close. Stars Vin Diesel, Jason Statham.
BORG VS MCENROE (M)
***
SUN 10.30PM WORLD MOVIES
Was the 1980 Wimbledon Mens Final between Bjorn Borg and John McEnroe the greatest game of tennis ever played? This dramatised take on that tumultuous five-setter believes the answer is most certainly yes. Borg (portrayed with inscrutable focus by Sverrir Gudnason) was the epitome of the Scandinavian iceman. And there will never be another American hothead as instantly inflammable as McEnroe (Shia LaBeouf, a good physical and emotional match for the role, even if his tennis skills are suspect). Once the plot dispenses with the off-court soap operas, the big game itself is an epic stunner. Particularly the amazing fourth set, where Borg butchers no less than seven match points.
RUSH (M)
***
SUN 11.00PM 10 BOLD
An enjoyable and exciting time capsule of old-school Formula One motor racing, with the main focus on the 1976 Drivers Championship. Two daredevils cleared out from the pack and duelled for the ultimate honours. Their rivalry? Beyond intense. Their individual personalities? Beyond opposite. British maverick James Hunt (Chris Hemsworth) drives fast, and lives even faster. Austrian ace Niki Lauda (Daniel Bruhl) plays the percentages, and lives only to drive. Though Lauda almost dies in a fiery wreck at the German Grand Prix, it all comes down to the final event of the season. As directed by Ron Howard from a workmanlike script by Peter Morgan (Frost/Nixon, The Queen), Rush goes about its business like Hunt and Lauda themselves: briskly and bluntly. Great racing sequences throughout, too.
Originally published as Your night in: Weekend movie guide