‘I would never have given up on him’: Life as a 16-year-old new mum
A Loxton teen mum shares the moment she found out she was pregnant and the backlash she faced from family and strangers when she decided to raise her son.
SA News
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Eight days before her 16th birthday, Alesha Nickolai found out she was pregnant.
The Loxton teenager was told “should use a coathanger to get rid of it” by some local men.
“They were real rude about it,” Alesha said.
But despite being told to terminate the pregnancy by family and complete strangers, she followed her heart saying the thought never entered her mind.
“I would have never given up on him,” she said.
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And Alesha, now a mum of one, said lot of people in the Loxton community had been supportive of her, often asking how she was and she paid no attention to those who weren’t.
Mum, Jenna Nickolai, has been there for daughter from the moment she took the pregnancy test.
“She came out of the toilet yelling ‘mum, mum’ and was crying,” Mrs Nickolai said.
“We sort of suspected it, we were excited but at the same time scared of telling my husband and her boyfriend.”
Facing backlash from her extended family – with her grandmother cutting off contact – Alesha decided to continue with the pregnancy with the support of her boyfriend and father of her child, Zach Field, as well as her mum, dad and two siblings.
Her son Hayden, who is a finalist in The Advertiser’s Cutest Baby Competition, was born in June.
“We told her (Alesha’s grandmother) that she had Hayden and we haven’t heard high or low from her,” Mrs Nickolai said.
“My mother made it very clear she wasn’t happy about the pregnancy and that she shouldn’t have the baby, she should have an abortion or put it up for adoption … they don’t speak to us at all.”
A grandmother at just 41, Mrs Nickolai said she “wouldn’t change it for the world.”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way now,” she said.
Alesha and Zach, 17, have been together for three years and are now engaged.
Homeschooled since primary school, Alesha and Zach were allowed time off to focus on their new addition.
When they finish their schooling, Alesha wants to get into hairdressing and Zach plans to train as a diesel mechanic.
Last year, the teen couple had a very different Christmas than other typical teenagers.
“She got a cot and everything she needed for a baby instead of what normal 16 year olds would be getting for Christmas,” Mrs Nickolai said.
To any other teenagers in her situation, Alesha gives them the advice to “follow their heart” just as she did.
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