Marty Smith has good news for the many fans of his Brainwaves quiz and Last Word column

Readers who hang off every Brainwaves quiz and clever Last Word may have noticed something missing. Marty Smith explains his latest health battle – send a get well message here.

I love what I do. I always have.

Each morning, I get out of bed, wander down the hall to my office, sit at my desk and hope for the best.

Since I started work in radio in 1965, I have been blessed with a variety of jobs which have helped maintain my sanity. But, I’ve got to tell you, this one (if I can call it work) with The Advertiser, is by far the best of all. Luckily for me, it goes on and on.

For my entire life, until last December, I had enjoyed good health. I had never spent a day in hospital. Perhaps by frequently remarking on this good fortune, I jinxed myself.

Since December, I have had a series of transient ischaemic attacks (mini strokes) and related issues, some more serious than others. On one occasion my handwriting became illegible, and I couldn’t accurately type.

Then, there was the time I couldn’t co-ordinate getting dressed. Back in December, I lost touch with who I was and what was going on for the best part of a day.

The most recent on June 26 kept me in hospital for seven days. While I was there, the doctors found some other things they needed to investigate.

I was furious. I wanted to keep my engine running. Presumptuously, I told them I would be missed! And I had bills to pay.

SEND MARTY SMITH A GET WELL MESSAGE IN THE COMMENTS BELOW

Marty Smith at home in March 2021 with some of his extensive newspaper files. Picture: Matt Turner

My daily column began insignificantly in The Advertiser in 1987. It was joined at the hip by Brainwaves four years later. From my perspective, neither was meant to be in the paper for as long as they have.

What began unceremoniously as a twinkle in an editor’s eye seems to have grown like Topsy.

I hope my daily dose of jokes, one-liners, lowbrow philosophy, terrible puns, corny headlines and short, snappy titbits is something of an antidote to the news of the day. Occasionally, I wander into unknown territory … and surprise myself.

And then there’s the 50 questions on the weekend. The three of us – The Advertiser, the readers and myself – are still together after all this time. In this business, longevity means a lot. We’re family. I hope I can continue with The Advertiser in the future. I am encouraged by the fact that the last column of the beloved Max Fatchen was published a week before his death, aged 92, in 2012.

There remain some unanswered questions about my health and more scans and tests will be necessary. But I hope as the days go on, my life will become more stable.

Lying in my hospital bed last month, I began to imagine my obituary. Yes, that’s a bit over-the-top, but, heck, that’s the environment hospitals create. Some new and scary thoughts had to be processed.

I wondered who would write it and what they might say. Would anyone even care? My instructions would be to keep the fuss to a minimum, thank you.

Then I started to write the words myself. I didn’t get far. I was soon wheeled away for yet another scan and back for more of that “food”. (Why was cauliflower served with every main course? Cheaper than lettuce?)

Marty Smith's 75 questions for his 75th birthday quiz. Artwork: Steve Grice/ The Advertiser. You can relive the delights of this monster quiz here.

When I was away last December, I was surprised to receive many get-well cards and best wishes from ardent readers. Their messages of love and hope helped.

During the past few weeks while my daily column has been rebadged the Best of the Last Word (I didn’t know such a category existed) and my personal Brainwaves went missing, I’m told many calls, messages and letters have arrived asking where I am.

So, whoever you are, thank you for your concern. I hope this answers some questions.

I am doing OK and hope to be back in the usual places in next to no time … for a long time.

Fingers crossed!