I stayed in a $800 a night hotel and was deeply disappointed

On a recent trip to London I splashed out and stayed in a $800 a night hotel. But one weird thing annoyed me so much I'll probably never do it again.

Prepackaged sandwiches. Home cocktails. Waking up from a nap on a 15-hour flight only to realise there's still eight hours to go. Arriving at an airport from an international flight and seeing a coach waiting to take you to the terminal rather than a walkway.

There are a lot of disappointing things in life. But they all pale in significance compared to what happened to me during a recent holiday. 

After travelling around the UK for a couple of weeks I was high on life. I'd scrimped like a scrooge, staying at hostels, on grandparents' couches and in cousins' attics.

I thought sleeping in the same bed as my brother would be the worst thing about my trip to London. But it got worse. So much worse...

I even had to share the same bed with my brother on occasion, such was the extent of my penny pinching.

Finally though, after a long two weeks of drinking supermarket beer and stinging off our relatives, it was time to splash out. 

See also: 20 things every Aussie should do in London

On our last night in London, aided by a $600 travel voucher, we decided to splurge. 

We booked an $800-a-night hotel in Leicester Square, an area famous for its cinemas, theatres and Chinatown.

If your fancy hotel doesn't do free breakfast, what's the point?

The early signs were good. We walked out of the station into the West End, marvelling at the double decker buses, the Fawlty Towers theatre posters, the phone booths and the t-shirts in the souvenir shops with phrases like "mind the gap" on them. 

Within 5 minutes of our tube screeching to a halt like a deranged banshee ,we were at the door of our hotel, which was opened by a doorman with the demeanour of a Buckingham palace guard. 

I had a great time in the West End, but one aspect of my hotel infuriated me. Picture: James Booth

The interior seemed to be inspired by Doha Hamad International Airport: all marble columns and open space. Someone was playing a piano. We were impressed. 

However, as soon as we reached the check in desk we realised were out of place. 

I would have been happy even with a continental...

As rich jet-setters sipped their tea and G and Ts in the stately living room and said things like "golly gosh" and "marvelous, darling," we argued over the $550 charge they wanted to put on our credit card. 

As other city slickers in suits quietly thanked the bellboys for taking their luggage up to their rooms, we said "we'll carry our own, thanks."

See also: 22 things I can’t believe about the UK as an Aussie

And when we asked if breakfast was included and they said no, but you can add it on for £35 (AUD $68.95) I struggled to keep a straight face.

@jimjam1112

And yet a $80 a night hostel gives you dinner for free #travel #london #traveltiktok

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After mortgaging the rest of our holiday funds into the security deposit (I thought we were renting a room for a night, not buying a house?), we went upstairs and took in the scene.

Though everything was lovely, it was crushing to realise we'd blown $800 only to have to sleep in the same bed yet again (at least with our own sets of sheets each this time) and without any complimentary breakfast to look forward to. Not even a continental.

See also: We've tried hundreds of hotel buffet breakfasts. These are our top 7

Adding salt to the wound was the memory of our first night in London, when we'd stayed in an $80 a night hostel, where they provided a free family dinner for everyone. 

In the morning, we gave the £25 (AUD $49.26) Parisienne breakfast a miss and said "no thanks" to the £35 (AUD $68.96) full English. 

Across the road there was a Greggs (one of England's most iconic fast food joints) and I ordered a £1.30 (AUD $2.56) sausage roll. After finishing it I thought, you know what, at that price I'll have one more. Now that's luxury...

Originally published as I stayed in a $800 a night hotel and was deeply disappointed