True story: ‘I’m half the woman I was and so much happier’

Amanda Kearvell has spent her life on a weight loss merry-go-round. Here she shares the pressures women face every day - and it starts young.

After decades of fad diets and gruelling exercise regimens, Amanda Kearvell chose weight loss surgery and hasn’t looked back.

I was complaining to Karyn, one of the mums at school, about my weight, as per usual. She said to me, “You have to go and see this friend of mine, she specialises in weight management.”

I made an appointment where she worked at Re: You (a GP-led clinic specialising in weight management and metabolic health).

I went along thinking, “I’m just going to leave with another diet and be told off for not exercising, not being disciplined.”

But the doctor went through everything with me and I actually left feeling I had options – both medical and surgical.

I was 45 and had been on this merry-go-round of weight loss since I was nine years old.I wasn’t a particularly large child, but I didn’t feel comfortable in my own body.

I stood out from my peers and, you know, in the schoolyard, kids are cruel.

I’ve been on at least 50 diets.

Amanda Kearvell today. Picture: Supplied

Amanda had tried the shake diet.

I’ve done the shakes and Weight Watchers … they may work for some, but, for me, the weight always came back – with reinforcements – every time.

The doctor explained the biology behind the weight regain and why this happens. I finally understood that it wasn’t my fault.

I was like, “Okay, I’m done with this, and I think surgery is going to be for me.”

It was a multidisciplinary approach. I had to see a dietitian, a psychologist, an exercise physiologist and, obviously, a surgeon and a bariatric GP. I needed to have that mind, body and soul connection to be ready.

Unpacking all the diet myths and every promise I’d made to myself – “when I turn, 20, 30, 40” – was the hardest part.

I knew if I didn’t change and approach this with a multidisciplinary team, things wouldn’t change, and the support I had was amazing.

The bariatric procedure I had is known as a gastric sleeve, which meansthat I’ve had 80 per cent of my stomach removed.

That also removes a lot of the hunger hormone ghrelin, so I don’t have that drive to eat a lot. I get full very quickly.

A healthy vegetable soup. Picture: iStock

Now my food choices are really sensible, because I treat my tummy like prime real estate. I make sure I have protein to look after my body. I want to keep my muscle mass, especially being a woman who is perimenopausal. We keep on top of my bloods to make sure I am nutritionally and metabolically healthy … aftercare when you have the surgery is important.

To be honest, from a looks perspective, it’s great to be thinner,but I was also thinking of my health.

I am looking forward to the next 30, 40-plus years, without the fear of developing diabetes or having high blood pressure or sleep apnoea, all the complications that can occur when carrying excess, unhealthy weight.

I was a size 18, and now I’m an eight.

Society judges people who are larger, as well. All of a sudden, the doors opened for me.

People now approach me in the (fashion) shops … not that it should all be about that … but it’s amazing, I’m actually not invisible anymore.

Amanda Kearvell with her husband Tyrone. Picture: Supplied

I’ve got four teenage kids and they see me happy. My husband Tyrone is happy for me too.

There’s no more breakdowns when it comes to social events, some crazy diet or “I haven’t got anything to wear”.

Now he’s like, “You can stop buying clothes now, everything fits.” It’s funny, I went through this real stage of wanting to buy everything. In the beginning, I would still reach for size 18 and shop assistants would say, “Who’s that for?”

Now, I actually don’t have that many clothes because I’m satisfied with who I am. I don’t need to fill my life with stuff.

I’m living my best possible life, feeling healthier and alive. I sleep better. I don’t have reflux anymore. My knees and ankles don’t hurt. I can spring out of bed.

It took me a while to stop seeing the gym as punishment.It was always as though I had to go for an hour and it would be almost vomit inducing for me to feel that I had done a workout.

Now I’m more looking at things like pilates and strength work to look after my body.

I enjoy swimming as well. Putting a bathing suit on is a different experience; I’m not hiding behind a sarong or towel.

Amanda Kearvell today. Picture: Supplied

Exercise, including walking, is now enjoyable.

Walking is also one of my favourite things.

When I bump into people I haven’t seen since my weight loss the first thing they say is, “You look amazing”, which is fantastic.

It did take a while to accept the compliment, because I knew the weight would come back.

But it has been four years since my surgery, and I’ve kept it off.

People also ask, “What did you do?” and I’m very honest.

Now that I’ve lost weight, I make eye contact. My shoulders are back, my head is up, I’m not scared to walk in the room. I don’t need to hide anymore.

I’m happier. Losing weight has given me the confidence to step forward in everything I do. I’m actually in the body that I want to be in.

Amanda now works for Re: You as a patient liaison manager. reyouhealth.com.au

Originally published as True story: ‘I’m half the woman I was and so much happier’