SA domestic violence royal commission reveals shocking abuse on children and teens

These children are suffering unimaginable abuse behind closed doors but say when they reach out for help, no one is listening. Read their stories.

Children have told of having their noses broken by parents, being beaten “so bad that I couldn’t walk” and living like prisoners at home, in a shocking new insight into family violence in South Australia.

Others have witnessed abuse, including rape, and had to sleep at a train station or “meth house” to escape abusive households.

Heartbreakingly, many say when they tried to get help – including from teachers or police – they were dismissed.

“Everyone knew (but) … no one gave a f**k. And they saw the bruises,” said Arlo*, 16, who was among 53 teenagers interviewed.

Their alarming stories are revealed in a report released as part of a royal commission into domestic, family and sexual violence in SA.

Titled Silence and Inaction, it details hard-to-read experiences of “violence and systemic failure” for the teens, aged 13 to 18.

Royal commissioner Natasha Stott Despoja said the accounts “highlight the many ways they were let down” by those “meant to protect them”.

The findings will inform her final report, to be handed to the state government next month.

Shocking abuse

Leading family violence expert Professor Kate Fitz-Gibbon interviewed the teens, unearthing

harrowing cases including:

A GIRL who was beaten “so bad that I couldn’t walk” and had to stay home from school for a week “because my parents didn’t want to ruin their image”.

CHILDREN witnessing their paternal uncle “raping mum in front of us”.

A FAMILY forced to flee their home “in the middle of night with none of our sh--” to stay in a motel.

A 13-YEAR-old who had to sleep on the floor of a government office because there was no housing available.

A TEEN boy threatened with death if he “let anyone know” about his abuse.

Fern, 16, told the royal commission about abuse by her mother.

First Nations girl Fern*, 16, told Professor Fitz-Gibbon she had experienced violence from the age of three.

She recalled how, on her first day of high school “my mum had broken my nose … so I had two massive black eyes”.

“I kind of had to be like, ‘Oh, I just tripped over and hit my face’,” Fern said.

“I would have bruises all over me and (teachers) wouldn’t even acknowledge it … I don’t know what they assumed.”

Fern told of other injuries, including “gashes on my head … my skull bleeding and matting (in) my hair”.

“I’ve had bruises everywhere. I’ve had baby teeth knocked out. I never went to hospital for anything.”

Professor Kate Fitz-Gibbon interviewed 53 teens for her report. NewsWire / Simon Bullard.

Let down by those meant to protect

Among the 32 boys, 18 girls and three non-binary teens interviewed, many said they experienced abuse by parents, extended family or foster carers.

Dylan* shared a chilling example of parental discipline turning to abuse.

“I kicked the wall when I was eight,” he said, “and my parents came in and they stripped my entire room bare.”

“I got water brought to me, food brought to me three times a day.

“My dad instilled (sic) a camera into the kitchen to stop me from eating late at night.”

Fern explained how her parents were openly cruel.

“(Dad) asked my mum if she would even care if I was dead, and she just blatantly said ‘No, honestly wouldn’t care … I’m sick of her’,” she explained.

Fern left home after hearing this and was later admitted to hospital but “my parents didn’t show up”.

Omar*, who suffered violence from age 12, talked about a female carer who “started touching me in ways I wasn’t comfortable with”.

“She kept telling me that even if I should tell someone, or my mum, they wouldn’t believe (me),” the 17-year-old said.

No one listened

Often the young people were afraid to speak up because they felt “ashamed”, blamed themselves or worried it would make things worse. Many who did say something felt dismissed.

Miles*, 17, said he told police officers and teachers that he was being abused but they brushed him off.

“They were like … ‘Those bruises on your body, it looks like you just been playing outside and hurt yourself”,” he said.

Levi* also sought help but was told there was “not enough evidence”.

“I had pictures of bruises … and videos … and they were just like, ‘We just can’t help you’,” the 16-year-old said.

Royal Commissioner Natasha Stott Despoja. Picture: Dean Martin

What must we do?

Professor Fitz-Gibbon’s report says there is an “urgent need” for better, and earlier, education about healthy relationships and recognising signs of controlling behaviour.

She also called on authorities to address a “profound absence” of dedicated services for young victims, including mental health support and medical exams following an assault.

And child victims should be able to access health or housing support without needing parental consent in cases where they are being abused at home.

Professor Fitz-Gibbon said young victim-survivors showed “extraordinary resilience” and “know what they need, despite largely never having received it themselves”.

“They want to feel safe. They want to be believed,” she said.

*Child names have been changed.

For support phone 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) or Kids Helpine (1800 55 1800).

Originally published as SA domestic violence royal commission reveals shocking abuse on children and teens