Why Melania Trump wore that jacket and other takeaways from her book

Washington: Melania Trump’s new memoir offers a few new glimpses into a life she has carefully walled off from the public, but readers hoping to understand one of the most mysterious first ladies in modern history will not make it past the gilded front gate.

First ladies write memoirs because they want to be understood. (The hefty contract doesn’t hurt, either.) Hillary Clinton wrote about her husband’s affair with an intern and the poisonous political process that followed. Michelle Obama revealed that she was angrier with her husband’s critics – one in particular – than she had ever let on while he was in office. Laura Bush used her book to voice her support for same-sex marriage and abortion rights.

Donald Trump told his wife, Melania, to write whatever she thought was right. Credit: Graphics

It is almost as if they must survive the role before they can write about it.

But in Melania Trump’s telling, her time as first lady was largely smooth sailing. Her book, an early copy of which was obtained by The New York Times before its release next week, does not reveal her to harbour differing views from her husband, Donald, beyond her support for abortion rights.

In fact, her grievances – with the news media, with “the opposition” and with aides she believes failed her and her husband – sound a lot like her husband’s, only dressed up in couture.

Here are five takeaways.

The big revelation is that she supports abortion rights.

Melania Trump made headlines this week when a reported excerpt from her book revealed that she supported abortion rights - a notable position given that her husband appointed three Supreme Court justices who helped overturn a constitutional right to the procedure.

“A woman’s fundamental right of individual liberty, to her own life, grants her the authority to terminate her pregnancy if she wishes,” Melania writes. “Restricting a woman’s right to choose whether to terminate an unwanted pregnancy is the same as denying her control over her own body.”

She also voices support for certain abortions performed later in pregnancy, saying many cases are “extremely rare” and calling for “commonsense standards”.

This is the most surprising opinion she expresses. Others are more in line with conservative orthodoxy, including her belief that transgender women should stay out of women’s sports. “Male bodies generally have physical advantages,” she writes.

Right behind him: As Melania Trump watches, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump signs paperwork to officially accept the nomination to run for president again this year.Credit: AP

She explains why she did not denounce the January 6 violence.

For every moment that Melania has appeared to veer away from her husband, there is another where she echoes his beliefs. The 2020 election is no exception.

Her husband has spent years railing against his loss to President Joe Biden and, as recently as this week, falsely claiming that the process was rigged.

In her book, Melania puts a softer focus on the same belief by questioning why it took so long for the election to be decided.

“You can’t continue to count votes for days, which is what they did,” she writes, ignoring the reality of how the country tallies millions of ballots. “It was a mess. Many Americans still have doubts about the election to this day. I am not the only person who questions the results.”

Even the parts of her book that are meant to showcase her legacy are clouded by post-election unrest, largely prompted by her husband.

In detailing her years-long commitment to restoring rooms in the White House – one of the most significant contributions she made as first lady – Melania writes that she was busy reviewing restorations when her husband’s supporters attacked the Capitol on January 6, 2021.

She writes that she declined to denounce the violence because her press secretary at the time – an unnamed Stephanie Grisham – did not give her the full details of what was happening. Melania writes that “my team was already behind schedule and focused on the task”.

A text message between Stephanie Grisham, former White House press secretary, and former US first lady Melania Trump displayed during the Democratic National Convention in August.Credit: Bloomberg

An attack on her son, Barron, fuelled her “Be Best” campaign.

Shortly after the 2016 election, one of the new president’s most vocal critics, comedian Rosie O’Donnell, posted speculation on social media that his youngest son and Melania’s only child, Barron, had autism. He was 10 years old at the time.

What followed was a social media hailstorm that prompted O’Donnell to apologise. Melania, who says in the book that Barron does not have autism, writes that the episode motivated her to centre her child-focused initiative, Be Best, on the issues of childhood welfare and online bullying.

She explains (sort of) the Jacket and the Hand Swat.

There are two episodes in her tenure in the White House that were so explosive and confounding that they can be referred to in shorthand: There was the Jacket, the incident in June 2018 when she wore a jacket with the words, “I REALLY DON’T CARE, DO U?”, while on a trip to visit migrant children in Texas.

Melania Trump ordered the “I REALLY DON’T CARE, DO U?” jacket from Zara. Credit: AP

And there was the Swat, the time she slapped her husband’s hand away from hers while on a trip to Israel in 2017.

She writes in the book that she swatted his hand away because he was walking in front of her with Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and his wife, Sara. “The red carpet simply could not accommodate four of us abreast,” she writes. “It was a minor innocent gesture, nothing more.”

She has much more to say about the events leading up to her decision to wear the jacket. She blames Jeff Sessions, then-attorney-general, and not her husband for overseeing a family separation policy that led to thousands of migrant children being taken away from their parents at the southern border.

Melania recalls reading as much as she could about the separations before approaching her husband and lobbying him in private.

“The government should not be taking children away from their parents,” she says she told him. “This has to stop.” Donald Trump promised her he would look into the matter, and, soon after, signed an executive order ending the separations.

The decision to wear the jacket, she said, was to get back at the news media for its “skewed narratives” and “negativity”.

She talks about her marriage, but omits the scandals.

Readers of this book will learn that both Trumps love Elton John. They will learn that Melania doted on her husband and urged him to go to the hospital when he was sick with COVID-19. They will learn that the Trumps exchange letters with King Charles III as part of what Melania says is a friendly relationship.

Melania, a memoir by former first lady Melania Trump.Credit: Skyhorse Publishing

Readers will not get a better understanding of how Melania was feeling in 2018, when it was reported that her husband had paid off a porn actor to keep quiet about an affair that happened shortly after Barron was born. (She was furious.) There is no mention of an episode shortly before the 2016 election, when leaked audio from an appearance by him on Access Hollywood revealed him bragging about grabbing women by their genitals. (She was not very happy then, either.)

Instead, in passage after passage throughout the book, readers will come to understand that Melania Trump sees her husband as the victim of attacks by powerful forces seeking to bring him down. It all sounds familiar.

Her memoir, cloaked in a matte, black cover, has just one blurb on the back from an enthusiastic reviewer: “Melania’s commitment to excellence starts with her family,” the former president writes, “which Barron and I cherish deeply.”

This article originally appeared in The New York Times.

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