‘More than paint, less than a bulldozer’: This rundown property is Perth’s cheapest

A brutally honest and humorous commentary on a rundown home for sale in Perth’s east has made a local real estate agent go viral.

O’Neil Real Estate agent Mark Grogan, known for his witty sales tactics, was tasked with selling 6 Catlin Court in Gosnells – a three-bedroom home that in his words needs “more than paint” but “less than a bulldozer”.

Complete with a garden hose in the shower to “reach all those hard places”, a piece of colour bond in the pantry and a soiled mattress, it’s a steal, priced at $399,000 – the cheapest stand-alone home in Perth’s red-hot property market.

Grogan starts the video, titled Where Shopping Trolleys Fear to Roll, in the front of the home with a pep talk.

“You can do this, you’ve been selling real estate for 18 years; Have you seen worse? Maybe not. But can you do it? Yes, you can,” he can be heard saying as he prepares himself to enter.

“This is as is, where is, with all the stuff ... stuff you don’t want,” he said.

“So just assume that if you see it here in the picture, in the video, you need to fit it in a skip bin.”

Moving into the kitchen, Grogan states there’s not much to be salvaged.

“Let’s be frank because, I mean, even if we’re being Frank, Frank don’t want to cook nothing in that oven or on that stove, and Frank can’t because, frankly, it ain’t got no gas, it ain’t got no burners, but there is a gas supply,” he says.

In one bedroom, there are several shopping trolleys, “super convenient if you’re heading to the shops” Grogan says, and in the toilet.

“Do you want to see in the bowl? No, you don’t, you’ll have to clean it, maybe get a whole new toilet”.

At this point, Grogan takes a couple of steps back out of the room and heads outside for some fresh air.

“The smell is, what do we describe it as? It’s probably mens room meets op shop,” he said.

But it’s not all bad, with good structural bones.

“I’m going to just say this house was actually really beautiful at one point…it’s not now, [but] it can be again if you’ve got what it takes,” Grogan said.

“If you’re a first home buyer … who keeps saying, oh, I can’t get in the market, or the money’s being made by interstate investors, yeah … but if you tackle a project like this, you can be one of the people that makes money off property when you sell it in the future.”

The advertisement estimates by sinking $50,000 into renovations, any buyer could turn a good profit in today’s low-supply high-demand market.

One hundred interested buyers have already booked for a private showing of the home on Friday, with a second open scheduled for Saturday.

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