It was a December night in 2005, at her grandmother’s home in Melbourne, when Lily Parmenter last saw her mum.
They exchanged Christmas gifts: 19-year-old Lily gave her mother a delicate crystal ball necklace, bought from her first proper paycheck, and her mum gave her a jewellery box.
At the end of the night, they hugged goodbye, and told each other “I love you”, before driving their separate ways.
“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve replayed driving away, wishing I could have done something to change the course of events that happened next,” Lily says.
Days later, 44-year-old Katie O’Shea boarded a plane, bound for far north Queensland, carrying three bags full of baby items in her luggage.
Katie thought she was about to become a grandmother.
Instead, she came face-to-face with her killer – who has evaded police for almost 18 years.
Katie’s eldest son, Alan O’Shea, lived with his partner in Ravenshoe, a remote town surrounded by rainforest about two hours’ drive south of Cairns.
They were expecting their first child as Katie arrived in late December.
The baby was born in January, and Lily called her older half-brother to congratulate him. She asked how her mother had reacted, and Alan replied that she was at a friend’s house.
It was then that Lily discovered her mother had not been seen since December 29.
Panic set in, and from Melbourne, Lily called around the Millaa Millaa area near Ravenshoe – the place that was once her home. She urged her brother to contact the police.
“I remember saying to him, ‘Where’s mum?’ And he was like, ‘Oh no, she’ll be around,’” she says.
Not until January 13 did Alan report her disappearance at Atherton police station.
“My older brother took so long to report her missing. The crucial period was way past gone, almost like a day or two past gone,” Lily says.
“And then also avoided every possible way, every possible interview with police after that.”
An inquest in 2014 heard Alan had told police he drove his mother to the Ravenshoe pub on the morning of December 29, where she purchased a six-pack of Coopers Stout.
He then drove Katie into Atherton, dropping her off halfway down a street, he said, so she could walk into town while she finished her beer.
Katie had told him she was going to see a friend in nearby Mareeba, but only wanted a lift to Atherton and would make the rest of the way herself.
Speaking to police that January, Alan said he didn’t think this was unusual, as she had said she wanted to go to the pub to play pool.
He said it was the last time he saw his mother.
Lily has had almost 18 years to pore over the details of the case.
She has always doubted theories that Katie was hitchhiking on the morning she went missing.
“I know mum wouldn’t have just gotten into a car with someone she didn’t know,” she says.
“Granted, in the ’80s, when hitchhiking was cool, she may have – but she was also in her 20s, and [serial murderer] Ivan Milat hadn’t been found yet.”
Katie would tell her children never to get into cars with strangers, using the name of the notorious “backpacker killer” to underline the risk of rape and murder.
“I remember we used to go, ‘Who’s Ivan Milat?’ She was like, ‘You don’t want to know.’ We were six.”
Lily does not believe the killing of her mother was premeditated.
Detective Brett Devine, who has been investigating the case since 2006, is of the same opinion. He says the crime was unplanned, and most likely one of opportunity.
But investigators lack the final pieces of the puzzle.
A reward announced this year of $500,000 remains on the table. Lily and police continue to urge anyone with information to come forward.
While there have been several tip-offs – including some from clairvoyants – the detective says none of the information has been credible.
“I wish something would come from it,” he says.
Alan has been in police sights since the beginning. But another man, a convicted killer who was in the area at the time – and who knew Alan – is also a person of interest.
Frank Wark, now convicted of heinous crimes against women, knew Alan at the time his mother went missing. They met when Wark went with a friend to Alan’s house to buy timber.
Wark was in the area at the time Katie disappeared, and police harboured strong suspicions about him.
In 2021, Wark was sentenced over the manslaughter of teenager Hayley Dodd, last seen in July 1999 while walking along a road in Western Australia’s Wheatbelt.
Wark also pleaded guilty to rape, sexual assault and deprivation of liberty after holding captive for six hours a woman he had picked up on the Palmerston Highway in 2007.
To this day, police view Wark and Alan O’Shea as their main persons of interest over the disappearance of Katie O’Shea.
The 2014 inquest did not determine a cause of death. Coroner Jane Bentley found she had died on or shortly after December 29, most likely killed by an unknown person or persons, who she met either at the Atherton Hotel or not long after she left it.
The last reported sighting of Katie was at the hotel’s bottle shop, where a worker said she had come in with two men for a couple of minutes.
The inquest also heard Alan’s housemate, identified only as “Mr A”, claiming Alan said to him: “You know I killed Mum, don’t you?”
The housemate said his memory of the event was clear. Alan had been drinking, he said, and he thought Alan was trying to scare him. But he did not believe Alan had killed his mother.
Alan never participated in the inquest. The findings suggest he made that decision because he believed police were treating him as a person of interest. He also declined police interviews.
By February, Alan and his partner had left north Queensland and flown back to Melbourne. Both still live there, although they are now separated.
Lily Parmenter and her other siblings live in Melbourne, too.
Christmas each year represents another reminder of a life that could have been – a life taken from Katie O’Shea, and lost to them all.
Some days, like family events, are harder than others. As they and their families grow, Lily can’t help but think, Mum should be here for this.
Faded photos recently discovered by Lily show a goofy yet loving mum, surrounded by her kids. She spent a weekend not long ago scanning them into her computer, every detail important.
She still holds hope for the day she’ll finally be able to find her mother.
“It’s 18 years now this year. And I wish I could say it got easier.”
Anyone with information regarding the disappearance of Kathleen ‘Katie’ O’Shea is urged to contact police.