Private school boys expelled over list ranking female classmates on appearance

Two boys have been expelled from an exclusive private school in Melbourne’s east after producing a spreadsheet that used disparaging language to rate female classmates’ appearances.

Yarra Valley Grammar principal Dr Mark Merry announced the decision in a statement on Tuesday morning, saying he had formed the view that the position of the students had become “untenable” at the school.

“As a consequence, they will not be returning to the school,” he said.

The boys were among a group of three year 11 students suspended from the Ringwood school after sharing a spreadsheet of photos of their female classmates to messaging app Discord, ranking them in categories including “wifeys”, “cuties”, “mid”, “object”, “get out” and then finally “unrapable”.

Merry said other students who played a lesser role in the matter had been subject to “further disciplinary action”. He said the school had wanted to ensure those responsible were held accountable for their actions.

“The investigation of this issue has been complex and time-consuming and can’t be rushed and I thank our students and families for your patience and confidence as we ensured that all the circumstances were known,” he said.

“The past week has obviously been a difficult one for our community … I am saddened that the actions of a few individuals can cause so much harm as social media has the power to amplify the damage that can be done and the anguish inflicted.”

Merry said Yarra Valley Grammar was characterised by respectful relationships “most of the time”.

“Clearly though, more work needs to be done to ensure that everyone feels valued and respected here at school,” he said.

“While we conduct regular sessions on respectful relationships and model care and respect in all that we do; this has not been enough. We will be reviewing all of our programs to ensure that the dignity of all is respected. This needs to be a learning moment for all of us.”

Merry said Yarra Valley students were taught respectful relationships under the Tomorrow Man and Tomorrow Woman programs, which seek to challenge traditional perceptions of masculinity and unrealistic expectations of girls and women.

He said while the lessons were impactful (“we’ve had young boys leaving the sessions in tears”), more work needed to be done in all schools to counter inappropriate messages with which boys were “bombarded” via the internet.

Merry said misogynistic behaviour was not new in schools but the reach and damage was now far greater when it was published online. He said while teaching of respect began in the home, it continued in schools.

“I won’t shirk our responsibility,” he said. “The first educators of young people are their parents but we have a role to play.”

The principal said he accepted the incident had occurred at his school, but that behaviour was not specific to Yarra Valley Grammar.

“Sexism and misogyny are ever present in our society and it is the responsibility of all of us – families, teachers, the media, workmates and friends – to stand up and make it clear that it is not acceptable anywhere.”

The school became aware of the post after an anonymous tip-off last Wednesday. By Friday, after the school had verified the tip, the students were suspended pending further investigation. The parents of the girls pictured in the post were notified by the school.

Merry said on Monday he had also contacted the police.

Yarra Valley Grammar School principal Dr Mark Merry.Credit: Eddie Jim

Victoria Police said in a statement that investigators would assess the reported information to determine if it was a criminal matter.

There are 185 students in year 11 at the prestigious co-ed school in Ringwood, which costs about $30,000 a year per student.

Monash University social sciences lecturer Dr Stephanie Westcott, who is an expert on sexism in schools, said the school’s decision to expel the students represented a prioritisation of girls’ safety at school and their right to an education without fear of sexism or sexual harassment.

“However, this case is just an example of a national problem of widespread sexual harassment, sexism and misogyny in schools,” she said.

“It’s a problem requiring a meaningful, targeted and long-term response from government. Unfortunately, the Albanese government’s recent funding and policy announcement on gendered violence against women ignored schools as places of priority intervention.

“Until we see action from government, these incidents will continue to occur.”

With Christine Ahern

Support is available from the National Sexual Assault, Domestic Family Violence Counselling Service at 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732).

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