Each week Dr Kirstin Ferguson tackles questions on workplace, career and leadership in her advice column Got a Minute? This week: being tasked with reinstating a workplace bully, dealing with a rude receptionist and keeping news from the team.

I work in HR and spent six months building trust with a team who spoke up about their senior leader’s bullying which included shouting, intimidation, and grilling staff behind closed doors. An external investigation substantiated several allegations, yet the CEO’s response was to blame HR and call for less confidentiality. Now I’m expected to help facilitate this leader’s return. I’m horrified. How do I face the people who came forward, protect my own integrity, and survive in a system that punishes those who tell the truth?

Your chief executive is clearly not appreciating how challenging a position they are placing you in. On the one hand, your CEO wants you to uphold the company values and hold people to account, but on the other they take away any authority or credibility for you to do so. If your CEO blamed HR for the behaviour of a senior leader, I can’t see how you or any new HR leader in your company will succeed.

Given the investigation substantiated some of the allegations, I would have thought the CEO needs you more than ever to help this team navigate what will be extremely challenging for all involved once the senior leader returns. You are bound to see resignations, low morale and cynicism from those who spoke up but now have their old boss back. The question I would be asking is whether it is worth it to remain in an organisation where these kinds of events can occur and where it may happen again.

The receptionist where I work is unbelievably rude. When I arrive in the morning she rolls her eyes at me, will not make eye contact when I am talking to her about work related things and if I ask her if she has read my emails she replies with “oh I did see something from you, I figured it wasn’t important” or “why can’t you just call me to discuss that?” I have had enough. I spoke to the HR manager and because there are no witnesses, and she is nice as pie in front of him, he refuses to do anything about it. How can I manage this without making the situation worse? I have tried multiple times to be nice, she is just not friendly towards me at all.

In an ideal world, I would suggest you speak with her, very respectfully and with genuine curiosity, to try to understand why she behaves the way she does toward you. Ask her whether there is something that has happened to cause her to find working with you difficult. Often when someone behaves like this, they are stuck for words when someone asks them about it. She is being passive-aggressive so trying to understand why, could help. Although I do wonder whether she is like this with everyone? While it may feel personal, she could be difficult with others too (which makes me wonder how on earth she got a job on the front desk which is customer facing).

If all else fails, stop worrying about her behaviour and just focus on outcomes. If she rolls her eyes, smile and ignore it. But, if there is an email she hasn’t actioned, get right on it. If she doesn’t, speak to her boss but be sure to focus on the thing she hasn’t done – not the intangible behaviour. You may not end up winning the war, but you might win some of the battles if you just focus on what can be seen, measured and actioned.

Our executive team is exploring a business merger, but it’s still confidential. My team keeps asking about our future, and I feel like I’m lying when I reassure them, we’re just “business as usual”. I’m not allowed to disclose anything, but I also don’t want to lose their trust. How honest can a leader be when honesty might cause panic — or get you fired?

You can’t be honest with them, or at least not yet. This is not something to feel guilty about – these are your legal obligations as a leader in the business. You are often going to be privy to information which cannot be shared. Your team will understand when the time comes as to why you could not say anything and if they don’t, it is a reflection on their lack of awareness of your role and responsibilities.

To submit a question about work, careers or leadership, visit kirstinferguson.com/ask. You will not be asked to provide your name or any identifying information. Letters may be edited.

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