My boss keeps all our client gifts for himself, despite not doing any of the work

Each week, Dr Kirstin Ferguson tackles questions on workplace, career and leadership in her advice column, Got a Minute? This week: a manager being greedy with gifts, the opposite of a promotion and a fear of age discrimination.

Company rules around accepting gifts should be clear and well circulated.Credit: Dionne Gain

Each year, my manager receives Christmas gifts from suppliers and does not share any of them with the team. We work many hours on the accounts (while he has barely any involvement) but he enjoys taking the gift baskets and wine home for himself. It is making us all angry, and discredits the hard work the team has put in all year. A few of us spoke to the chief executive, who said our manager ensures everything runs smoothly, which is why he receives the gifts, but this reply has not helped the situation. Are we overreacting?

What a minefield of issues you have raised. Let’s be clear: your suppliers are only giving gifts to your supervisor because he is probably the decision maker about whether they continue supplying to your company. Every supplier wants to have the best possible relationship they can with their customers. Gifts, tickets to events, gift cards, holidays – and in extreme cases, cash – are just some of the ways this is done. You can see how easily what might be argued is an innocent gift hamper can turn into something more serious, and corrupt.

For good reason, most organisations forbid these kinds of gifts (or at the very least, require them to be disclosed). Rather than asking to share the gifts, as you suggest, my recommendation would be finding out what your company rules are around accepting gifts. It sounds like your organisation has a fairly relaxed view but to be honest, it is a slippery slope and one your CEO is best to nip in the bud now before much bigger issues emerge.

I worked hard in 2023 and pushed for a major promotion, which I received. It came with a significant pay increase. However, after a little over a year, I hate this role. I have to spend most of my time doing things I don’t enjoy, when previously I was able to focus on my own projects. I am performing well, and I get great feedback, but I want a demotion. I really don’t want to leave my employer, great colleagues or leaders, but I doubt my employer will want a highly paid lower-output worker.

Good on you for knowing what you like doing and where your efforts are best directed. Many people don’t figure this out their whole careers. You should go and speak with your boss at an appropriate time and let them know what you have learnt about your strengths and skills.

It sounds like you are highly valued and doing great work. Your employer is not going to want to lose you, so reframe this as an opportunity for you and them to make sure they are getting the best from you. Don’t be afraid to let them know you love working with them, you are committed to a long-term career with the company and so for those reasons, you really want to make sure the job fit is right.

You don’t need to frame your position negatively, and I would take the word “demotion” out of the conversation, and your mind. Instead, I would encourage you to be honest about the areas where you feel you can add the most value. Focus on your strengths and even consider how you might be able to make a lateral move to fill any gaps you see in the organisation where you think you will best be able to help. Have some solutions in mind for how the tasks you don’t enjoy can be allocated elsewhere in a way that will benefit the company, and you.

Is it legal to insist that job applicants disclose personal information such as date of birth, sexual identity and racial background? I’ve recently started to apply for jobs after a career break, and I’m shocked to discover I’m often unable to submit my application through an online job portal unless I provide this information. I fear that this information will be used to discriminate against me before I can get to the interview stage – particularly, my age.

It is unlawful for an employer to require you to provide your age, for example, unless a particular age is a legal requirement for the job. Questions about your ethnicity and sexuality also open up a minefield of issues relating the privacy of your personal information and are generally unlawful to ask. Just asking these questions raises the potential for being discriminated against, so I would steer clear of any employer making the questions mandatory.

To submit a question about work, careers or leadership, visit kirstinferguson.com/ask. You will not be asked to provide your name or any identifying information. Letters may be edited.

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