My boss is catfishing me online. What can I do?
Each week, Dr Kirstin Ferguson tackles questions on workplace, career and leadership in her advice column, “Got a Minute?” This week: a fishy LinkedIn message, a clunky new boss and job-hunting at 55.
Despite what some people seem to think, pretending to be someone else online is never OK.Credit: Dionne Gain
I recently discovered my boss has been catfishing me on LinkedIn using someone else’s profile. The other person, who is a connection of my boss on LinkedIn, is a recruiter. I had been contacted by the “recruiter” about a role, but as soon as I responded, their profile disappeared. I think my boss was testing my loyalty, but it felt like entrapment. My boss holds the keys to my career progression in an otherwise good company. Is there anything I can do?
Hold the phone. Your boss did what? Pretending to be someone else online is not OK and the behaviour of your boss is way out of line. If they are comfortable doing this to you, they may also be catfishing other people in other ways. Creepy stuff.
But are you 100 per cent sure? Do you know for a fact it was your boss? If so, I think you have every right to raise this with someone at work. While you might feel uncomfortable admitting you responded to a recruiter, that is way less weird than your boss behaving this way.
However – and I can’t emphasise this enough – unless you are positive it was your boss, proceed with caution. There are loads of weirdos online, including people on LinkedIn who get in touch about jobs that don’t exist: a bog-standard spam or phishing attempt. Could that have happened in your case? Second, if the connection of your boss were a legitimate recruiter, they would, most likely, not agree to do this. It is far too risky for their reputation. They would also not delete their LinkedIn profile, or have it “disappear”, since their business depends on LinkedIn.
Ultimately, you have done nothing wrong. Responding to an interesting new job enquiry is perfectly fine, so if you feel your boss is blocking your progress, take it further.
I have been working for the government for a few years in a mid-level role. After a change in government, I got a new boss. I’m not sure whether I’m being overly sensitive, but I get the feeling she really dislikes me. My boss recently thanked my project team for a completed piece of work and sent it to everyone in the working group except me. She also said during our first one-on-one that a degree is just a piece of paper, and she doesn’t believe in being promoted just because of that, knowing I have multiple degrees. I got along really well with my last boss and have never badmouthed a single person during my career, but I don’t know what to do.
It sounds like you have a few orange flags but not necessarily red flags yet. If you and your last boss got along well, it is only natural that someone new will take time on your part to get used to. To me, your new boss sounds (a) careless and (b) clunky: let me explain.
It was careless of your boss to email everyone and leave you off it. It’s less likely she did it deliberately and much more likely she did not check and recheck the list was correct. We have all been in the position of leaving someone off an invitation list, a WhatsApp group or an email. Generally, it is not deliberate, and I would work on that assumption until you have reason to think otherwise.
I think the way your boss spoke to you about degrees was clunky. What I mean by that is she could have expressed herself more clearly. What I suspect she meant to say is, “degrees – on their own – are not enough to get promoted on”. She clearly believes whether someone gets promoted depends on a range of factors such as experience, time in a role, leadership nous, whatever the case may be.
You have quite rightly noticed some orange flags with your new boss. I would now wait and see whether they turn red or whether they are more the sign of a new boss trying to make an impact but doing so in a far from elegant manner.
I am over 55 and recently took a redundancy. I want a career change, but have read it’s difficult to get hired at my age. Are there any agencies that could help?
It is definitely more difficult to find employment as an older worker but by no means impossible. The Department of Employment and Workplace Relations has great resources for mature-age workers on its website. You can also visit job boards aimed at older workers, such as seekingseniors.com.au and olderworkers.com.au. Good luck!
To submit a question about work, careers or leadership, visit kirstinferguson.com/ask (you will not be asked to provide your name or any identifying information. Letters may be edited).
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