I once dated Heath Ledger. He’s the reason I met my husband

New Zealand-born actor Simone Kessell is best known for playing Lottie Matthews in the TV series Yellowjackets. The 49-year-old shares how her ex-boyfriend, the late Heath Ledger, introduced her to her husband, film director Gregor Jordan, and why she’s never taken his last name, as she discusses the important men in her life.

Simone Kessell used to think she wasn’t the marrying kind.Credit: Getty Images for Paramount+ with Showtime

My Maori maternal grandfather [Koro] Jack Gardiner was one of the grumpiest and mightiest of men, but he had a soft spot for me. I was the sporty grandchild, and he was a former Maori All Black. He passed away four years ago.

I sunk a dinghy in the river at the back of his house as a kid. I was with my cousin, and he came out and yelled at us. I blamed my cousin. She looked up at Koro who was very scary and didn’t say it was me. He was the sort of man who got over his temper quickly. He had big hands, loved the cows on his farm, and every Christmas I was the one who always gave him a cow mug.

I get my empathy and compassion from Dad, Michael Kessell. He is a bit eccentric, very tactile and warm to strangers. He was also a good sportsman and my tennis coach.

I broke his heart at 15. I had been doing theatre and was cast in a TV series, and suddenly a new world opened up. I can still remember Dad asking, “What about tennis?” I was like, “What about it?” As careless as teenagers are, I broke his heart as we always talked about going to Wimbledon.

Dad met Mum, Matewiki, when she was a waitress in Auckland. He was a dishwasher at the time and then worked his way up to head chef. She helped him run their restaurant. They also ran a wedding reception lounge and we lived out the back as a family. Dad carved ice sculptures [Laughs]. I remember an exquisite peacock for a wedding.

I never thought I would get married. I thought I was too cool for that.

I had a crush on a boy at primary school when I was six. He asked if he could give me a kiss and I said no. I then put a leaf to my cheek and said you can kiss the leaf, and he said OK. I was thrilled.

I had a long-time boyfriend when I was 16 to 19. He was the cool guy from the boys’ school and was very popular. We stayed together a few years out of high school. I was close to his family. We attempted to go flatting together, and then the wheels fell off. I last saw him at a mutual friend’s wedding 10 years ago.

As a kid, I had a crush on John Travolta. I would stand on my bed and kiss the poster of him goodnight. Then I met him in real life. They say never meet your idols.

I moved to Sydney at 19 and began a new life as a Kiwi girl in Australia. I was flatting with my gay bestie, Steve. We got the crappiest house on the best street in Bronte.

I had many lovely acquaintances in that time, and dated a lot of actors, many well-known. I went out with Heath Ledger in the late ’90s. We were incredibly close. When we broke up, we continued to stay in touch. He had an open-house policy for his Aussie friends who visited him in LA. I would stay at his place. He is the reason I met my husband Gregor Jordan, who directed Heath in his first feature film, Two Hands.

When I met Gregor, I had just come out of another relationship with an Australian man, Ryan. Heath was the one who said I had the same sense of humour as Gregor. I met him and instantly dropped my guard. I was completely myself for the first time. I was so relaxed around him, and then we eloped after three months and married in 2004. He is my best friend.

I never thought I would get married. I thought I was too cool for that. I never took Gregor’s last name, and then we moved to LA and I had a baby. That was a big turning point for me. We lived there on and off for 15 years and moved back to Australia during COVID. The boys [the couple have two sons] are happy in Sydney and I go back and forth to LA constantly for work.

My friend Ian Thorpe and I were inseparable for a long while. When he came to LA to escape the limelight in Australia, he spent a lot of that time with me. I found the house he moved into and was there when he needed me. I haven’t seen him for a while, and we’re due a dinner. I love him dearly.

Season 3 of Yellowjackets is out now on Paramount+.

Get the best of Sunday Life magazine delivered to your inbox every Sunday morning. Sign up here for our free newsletter.