Don’t love your Christmas gifts? What you should (and shouldn’t) do

I was surprised to unwrap a pair of Country Road mugs from a relative a few Christmases ago. First, because I received something that I liked (she is known in our family for her poor present choices). And second, because I had seen them before – the Christmas prior when I gifted them to her.

Of course, I am not the only one who has been in an awkward and uncomfortable gift-receiving situation.

Teachers deal with this annually as they receive their 500th World’s Best Teacher mug. Grandpas, too, upon getting yet another jar of scorched almonds. Then there’s the office Kris Kringle, where it’s almost guaranteed you’ll receive something unneeded or unwanted.

If you receive a bad Christmas gift, be gracious, then act tactfully.Credit: Getty Images

While I didn’t disclose my relative’s faux pas and received her gift with genuine enthusiasm, it pays to have some strategies for dealing with Christmas presents you don’t like, or, as in my case, one that has been re-gifted.

It’s normal to feel disappointed: Clinical psychologist and author Dr Rebecca Ray says feeling disappointed by a lacklustre Christmas gift is normal. “It’s common to feel awkward, disappointed, or even guilty because the gift doesn’t suit your needs or taste,” she says. “These feelings often arise from wanting to appreciate the thought behind the gift but struggling with its practical or personal value.”

Show gratitude before you open: According to Julie Lamberg-Burnet, founder of the Sydney School of Protocol, there is a general etiquette that should be followed when receiving a gift. “The most important thing is to acknowledge the gift and be gracious when accepting it, even if you are anticipating it’s not something you might want,” she says. “Say, ‘Thank you so much for thinking of me,’ a sincere phrase that doesn’t overdo it.”

Lamberg-Burnet says this action respects and acknowledges the thought, time, and effort that went into planning, purchasing, and wrapping your gift rather than what the item is.

How to react to a bad gift: If you are close to the gift-giver and feel comfortable, it may be acceptable to tell them in a kind and respectful way, such as asking if you may exchange the colour or style, Lamberg-Burnet says.

However, if your relationship isn’t like this, she suggests handling the situation with grace.

Ray agrees. “Focus on their thoughtfulness and use a warm tone and maintain eye contact to show genuine appreciation for their effort.”

Other practical ways to respond to a gift you don’t like without offending the giver can include commenting on an aspect you appreciate, such as the colour.

Most importantly, limit tell-tale reactions such as eye rolls, says Ray. “Avoid hesitation or over-explaining, as these can make your feelings obvious.

“They might interpret your reaction as rejecting their effort, not just the gift.”

“Disposing” a bad gift: While it may not be your cup of tea, an unwanted gift can prove valuable, which is why Lamberg-Burnet suggests using it at least once.

If it doesn’t grow on you, donate it to an appropriate organisation. Repurposing or upcycling is also an option.

One thing you should never do, though, she says, is re-gift. “It can be very awkward if this is discovered,” she says.

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