AFL great Brian Taylor throws umpire under bus with tall tale

AFL great Brian Taylor has unintentionally raised eyebrows with a grand tale that unfolded during a milestone game in the 80s.

If you’ve ever attended a function with a former player booked in as the speaker, you know you’re in for grand tales from their playing days.

Like any great story, an addition or two can help to grow the story as the original tale quickly becomes a distant memory.

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Enter Brian Taylor.

The 140 game AFL great is a master wordsmith who can tell a story just as well as he used to kick a goal.

In 1986 Taylor looked well on track to become the fourth player in the history of the Collingwood Football Club to reach the historic 100 goals in a season mark.

Only two goals shy of the feat entering the final game of the season, disaster struck as he injured his groin and looked destined to be stranded short.

Thankfully he got on the end of a free kick and slotted his second goal to bring up the milestone.

His day saw him finish with a lacklustre three touches, outside of reaching the milestone it’s hardly a game to recall when trying to delight the masses.

That however hasn’t stopped Taylor from recounting the biggest moment from his career, albeit it with a little extra mayo.

But in his retelling of the historic day, Taylor’s expanded version has now seen him throw a former long-running AFL umpire under the bus.

The moment Taylor slotted his 100th goal.

“I’m on 98 goals, I’m two goals away from being the fourth player in Collingwood’s history to kick 100 and I could win the Coleman Medal,” Taylor said on the Life of Brian podcast.

“In the first minute of the game, (I) lead out strongly on my great mate Danny Frawley and took a big overhead mark, went back and kicked a big 99th goal.

“I’m thinking to myself how easy is this. But I’d strained my groin.

“Quarter time came and Leigh Matthews came up and said what’s wrong? I said I’ve strained my groin and he said I had to come off the ground.

“I said Leigh, I’m about to become the fourth player in Collingwood’s history to kick 100 goals I ain’t f**king coming off the ground.”

A solid story that captivates the listener as you’re left wondering what’s going to happen next. And so far it’s all absolutely true.

But Taylor didn’t stop at saying he overcame the injury and kicked his 100th goal, he added an extra little bit of flavour.

“Umpire approaches me as I’m going back to my position, the umpire was Peter Cameron, the brother in law of my vice-captain at the time David Cloke,” Taylor said.

“Pete said stay in front of Frawley, we know what’s wrong with ya Brian, we’ll look after you.

“I said thank you very much Peter. I walk down to full forward and Danny is standing there like a big bear ready to grab me.

Taylor’s version of the day is comedy gold.

Collingwood forward Brian Taylor lunges foward for a mark against St Kilda's Danny Frawley. Brian Taylor kicked his 100th goal for the season during the game.

“The ball comes down, it was a kick and a half away on the member’s wing, umpire Peter Cameron blows his whistle. Those upfield thought something had happened downfield, those downfield thought something had happened upfield.

“Free kick down field to Taylor, no one knew what happened.

“Taylor gets a free kick 35 out directly in front, Frawley was cursing the umpires because he didn’t go near me but somehow I got the free kick.

“I kicked the 100th goal. So when I went down to have a drink with the umpires and the opposition players I said to umpire Peter Cameron, ‘in 10 years you haven’t given me one free kick … today in one quarter you gave me two free kicks, why?’

“He said, ‘well Brian Taylor at the start of the year to kick 100 goals was 80-1, I had $10 on ya. And that was it.’”

And that ladies and gentlemen is how you turn a good story into a great one. Taylor smeared on the mayo and his retelling of the moment has left countless people at functions in stitches.

Given it widely accepted that there’s no truth at all to the statement, presumably audiences have taken it as a tonge-in-cheek joke from a well-loved larrikin.

But the story also garnered unwanted attention in recent weeks after he repeated it on the Life of Brian podcast, before a segment featuring the story, which you can watch above, was uploaded to Instagram.

While many were lapping up the story, plenty of footy fans appeared to have missed the joke.

Jay Allen, the AFL’s GM of Corporate Affairs, wasn’t entertaining any such serious interest in the story as he conveyed there was no truth to the allegations.

Collingwood's Peter Daicos is reported by umpire Peter Cameron for allegedly using abusive language.

BT has enjoyed a successful media career after retiring from football. Pic: Michael Klein.

“It is a sportsman’s night story that is filled with fiction (including the allegations you are referring to),” Allen told news.com.au.

“It has been embellished and re-told and heard hundreds of times in various football functions.

“There is no truth to the allegations.”

News.com.au does not suggest the allegations made by Taylor are true.

Peter Cameron’s stellar AFL career came to an end in 1993 after he umpired 306 matches which included 19 finals and three Grand Final appearances.

While he was unintentionally thrown under the bus in Taylor’s grand tale, the man himself has reportedly moved on from the game, as the AFL Umpires Association noted.

“Peter Cameron is now well removed from football and would prefer not to be contacted,” the Umpires Association told news.com.au.

So while Taylor’s story makes for a ripping listen, it’s a reminder that the next time you’re hearing a former player recall tales from their playing days … the story you’re hearing is as believable as a Marvel film.

Brian Taylor’s management was contacted but did not pass on a response to news.com.au.

Originally published as AFL great Brian Taylor throws umpire under bus with tall tale