In full: Grant Stevens’ beautiful tribute to his son Charlie
A loving father’s final tribute to his adored son brought mourners to tears at Charlie Stevens’ funeral. Read the Police Commissioner’s eulogy for his son in full here.
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At a twilight funeral service held Adelaide Oval on Thursday, Grant Stevens and wife Emma, along with their children and Charlie’s friends delivered heartbreaking eulogies in tribute to the 18-year-old.
Police Commissioner Grant Stevens, alongside his wife Emma, said:
“I start by saying that it really is something to see so many people here today, and we know that a lot of you don’t know Charlie but to be here to help us celebrate his life is something that we’ll always remember.
Emma and I have already shared a bit about Charlie in our letter #101. We’ve always enjoyed talking about our kids, but this was never something that we ever thought we’d have to do.
We never planned to have such a busy full house. Our boy Charlie was the last to arrive. But he almost didn’t make it.
After we had Tom, I incorrectly thought that four kids were enough. But Emma had other ideas. She thought that with a gap of six years between Josh and number four, that Tom would need a sibling to grow up with.
So, I suggested a labrador but the new puppy only delayed the inevitable, so we ended up with Charlie and another dog.
As the youngest, Charlie was unique. He probably got away with more than Dylan, Sophie, Josh and Tom put together, partly because he learned from them, but mostly because of his cheeky streak.
Charlie loved to tell stories instead of the truth.
His response to a simple question would often, without hesitation, involve some elaborate fiction delivered with a straight face.
It was only a few months ago when Emma and I were in Bali. He told us over the phone that he was getting another sausage dog and there was nothing we could do about it because we weren’t at home for a week.
He was bullshitting, of course, but he got the reaction he wanted and he also told us there were no gatherings in the house while we were away. But the recycling bin told a different story.
We were sharing stories about Charlie this week.
Dylan reminded us of the time I took the four boys to a Mission Impossible movie when Charlie was only about 10 years old. There was a moment of building suspense in the movie. As Tom Cruise was defusing a bomb, and the full cinema was totally silent, that was the time Charlie decided to yell out ‘”bang!” Everybody jumped out of their seats.
As far as Charlie was concerned, mission accomplished.
Charlie was intense and immersed himself in the things that he loved. Surfing, footy, skateboarding, downhilling, work.
His passion for things was also infuriating, as he fixated on the latest obsession. Both Emma and I were repeatedly worn down by his incessant repetition about his need for a new skateboard, a new bike, new sandshoes, a new wetsuit.
And over the last few months, he was hammering us about needing another new car.
We were both bombarded with text messages from him with links to Toyota Hiluxes for sale. “Dad, this one’s only got 350,000 k’s on it!”
He proved to us that being single-minded sometimes produces results, but always annoys your parents.
Charlie was destined to be a tradie. His favourite toys were his ‘measurenate’, he couldn’t say tape measure, a real hammer and a real cordless drill that he got for his third Christmas.
Some of our friends thought that we were irresponsible for giving him a drill. But we were sensible, he had to settle for a toy circular saw, instead of a real one, much to his disgust.
He was always hammering nails, screwing screws and drilling holes. He removed the screws from everything including the outdoor furniture and the rungs of the stepladder.
He disassembled the wooden cubby house in the backyard plank by plank, taking the door off one day to replace his wardrobe door he had broken, thinking that we wouldn’t notice the difference.
There’s never been a time that Charlie has not been involved in sport, with footy being at the forefront.
He loved going to watch his big brothers play before he was old enough to play himself.
He was indoctrinated as a Tigers supporter as a baby, but that all changed when we took him to Geelong after the 2007 Grand Final.
He walked into the Cats’ merchandise store a Tigers fan and walked out a fully kitted-out Geelong supporter, and he’s been a Cats supporter from that time on.
Charlie’s love of downhilling, led to a part-time job with Ben at Bicycle Express, two days a week after school.
He loved working there, but he really loved the way he was treated by the boys in the workshop.
We thought he had a pretty good grasp of bad language, but it definitely improved working with those guys, and he loved being cashed-up.
At Sophie’s wedding, Charlie managed to con each of his brothers, his Uncle Tom, Andy and a couple of others, to get him a sneaky drink.
That was the night he tried beer and vodka cruisers. Needless to say, he had a very good time as a 15-year-old boy.
We said in that letter that Charlie never went to the hairdresser again after being forced to have a nice haircut for his sister Sophie’s wedding.
But as you heard from Tom (Rehn), that didn’t mean no more haircuts.
Just like Tom’s house, he was always cutting his own hair with his mates, or his mates were doing it for him – and like Tom’s bathroom, we had black hair all over the place, and like Tom, I knew it wasn’t mine.
His hairstyles were always changing, he was the only kid to turn up at school with a dusty mullet. He was fond of the mullet, he tried the head shave and the bowl cut.
But he was particularly proud of his dreadlocks that were growing as we said goodbye to him. And there may have been a couple of nits in there as well.
Despite the presence of takeaway food containers, empty glasses and lived-in mess, Charlie did clean his room and he was always rearranging the furniture.
When he was younger, it was hard to actually find him or his bed when we went in to kiss him goodnight, because his feet were often where his head was the night before.
Charlie really did enjoy being an apprentice chippy and as much as he loved playing footy, it was a sacrifice that he was happy to make so he could be at work.
Long days and lots of weekends were no problem.
It was only a few weeks ago, after another one of his long work days, we were standing in the kitchen with Emma and he asked me ‘how many hours did you work today?’
To which I replied ‘I’m always at work, mate’, following with his response, ‘yeah, but I’ve got a real job’.
Charlie’s year one teacher Tash wrote to us this week. And in that letter, she said and I quote, ‘he didn’t give a shit about schoolwork, he just wanted to be around his mates’.
‘School was all about having a good time. He was never sad, never complained and never dobbed on a mate.’
Charlie’s friends were important to him and there isn’t one that we don’t like or respect.
And it’s meant the world to us that Charlie’s mates have spent so much time with us since we lost him.
It warmed our hearts to have that group of boys just being in our home. Eating with us, raising a glass to Charlie, emptying the beer fridge and just being around.
You boys were always welcome in our home and you always will be.
We’ve had so many cards and messages from so many different families who have shared stories with us these last few days of how Charlie included their kids, and made them feel welcome, how he looked out for them. That was Charlie.
He genuinely cared about people. Everybody knew Charlie. He was known for his big heart and his big smile. One of his teachers also wrote to us this week, and in part of his letter, he said ‘the real memories of Charlie are that infectious smile and that very keen sense of humour and what a privilege it was to teach him’.
Charlie Stevens was no angel, but he was a good boy. He did have a big personality, a big heart and a good soul.
He was incredibly generous and his generosity extended to being an organ donor, something that we talked about with him when he got his driver’s license.
Charlie, your mum and I love you, and we are devastated that you were taken from us so soon.
You were a force of nature, full of energy, unstoppable, unforgettable. We are heartbroken now, but we can’t think of you without smiling.
We have missed you every day since we said goodbye, and we will always miss you.
We will love you forever, Charlie boy.”
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