Sarah Rose tributes: ‘You don’t have enough pages in the paper to cover who she was’
Sarah Rose was a lollipop lady, raised funds for a girl with leukaemia, was at the heart of community groups. An unsung hero to family and friends, and now after her passing, to some people who never even knew her. This is the story of a remarkable Gold Coast mum.
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Gathered around the hospital bed, Sarah Rose’s family prepared to make the most difficult and the most extraordinary of decisions.
It was New Year’s Eve, and hope was gone for the 45-year-old mother of two, sibling to three and friend to literal hundreds.
Incredibly fit and healthy, just two days earlier Sarah was pottering about her Palm Beach home when she suddenly dropped.
Paramedics were called and worked for more than 80 minutes to restart her heart, before transferring her to Gold Coast University Hospital where she was placed on life support.
Now, 48 hours later, the time had come to say goodbye. But as the tears poured down the faces of Sarah’s parents, her children, her siblings and their partners, they at least knew she would die as she lived – helping others.
Because as heartbreaking as New Year’s Eve was for her family, New Year’s Day would be a new beginning for countless families around Australia after the family agreed Sarah’s last wish would be to become an organ donor.
It was a fitting final role for Sarah, who was a connector in every social circle – and there were many.
She was a beloved lollipop lady at Tallebudgera State School, volunteer teacher for a Gold Coast sewing club, part of a roller derby group, an enthusiast for the Dinner with Strangers concept – where you meet and eat with five unknowns – and an avid member of the Gold Coast Family History Society.
It was through this last group that she made the ultimate connection – discovering she had an unknown older brother, born to the same parents but adopted before they were married.
That brother, Shannon Staunton, said the moment he met Sarah, it was like they had known each other forever.
Despite being separated for more than 40 years and both being born interstate, it turned out they now lived just 20 minutes apart on the Gold Coast.
He said while he only had six years with his little sister, she had made an enormous impact on his life.
“We’re all just lost without her. As soon as I met her, we just clicked,” he said.
“We had been chatting over messenger about a photo she posted on the family history page, I started asking questions and she was giving information and I realised … I think I’m talking to a sibling here.
“I always knew I had been adopted, but she didn’t know. I didn’t want to make any connections until our mother knew. It turned out she had tried to keep me, had actually taken me back after first putting me up for adoption, but she just couldn’t do it. It was a different time and there was so much pressure on my parents.
“They met again later and this time married and had my siblings, but I didn’t know any of this then.
“I went quiet on Sarah while I waited to hear from our mother, and then one day I got a message from her that said, ‘I know who you are, I know everything and I’m allowed to talk to you’.
“Then we were messaging back and forth and she let it slip that she was hungover that morning so I picked up a Big Mac Meal and headed over to her house, and that was it – we were family.
“The next time I saw her, she gave me a birthday card for every year we had been apart and said she didn’t know how much she had missed me all these years.
“She was just the best kind of nuts.”
Shannon said while he was never searching for another family, saying the family that adopted him were “brilliant”, it was a blessing to find a second family to love.
He said going through the trauma of losing Sarah together had brought them closer again.
“I’m the oldest brother but I’m the youngest in terms of knowing her, I don’t want to step on any toes or be in the way, but my siblings and (biological) parents have been amazing through all this,” he said.
“When we had the conversation about organ donation, it was very tough, especially for her girls, and I didn’t want to overstep. But they welcomed my input, and I had a cousin who received an organ donation so I know just how much joy and hope it brings to someone. It’s an incredible gift.
“Together we realised that we can’t change today for Sarah, but there are others crying tonight for fear of losing someone tomorrow … and through us they might be crying tears of hope by the morning.”
Sister Rachel Evans said she was overwhelmed by the impact Sarah had made on others.
She said messages had been flowing in from all the different groups she had been part of, families she had supported and friends she had made along the way.
She said Sarah’s unexpected death was also, so far, unexplained, with medical staff at a loss to explain her sudden heart event.
“She was so fit, she would walk at least 10km every day,” she said.
“Losing someone so young is awful, but the sudden loss is a trauma on top of that. Not knowing why she’s gone is another layer again.
“We are just so proud of who she was. And we’re proud that, as a family, we were able to make the decision together about what Sarah would want. It wasn’t necessarily what we would want, but it was absolutely what she would do, and that does give us some peace.
“It’s been incredible to have our older brother be a part of this too, he and Sarah were so close. It’s been amazing having him with us, there are a thousand ways meeting him could have gone wrong – for him, for us, for our parents, for his adopted parents – but I think us siblings are so similar we couldn’t not get along.”
In fact, brother Daniel said all four siblings would race cars together to raise money for Rare Cancers Australia.
He said he had lost count of the number of people who had been in contact talking about the bacon and egg rolls she would make for everyone.
“You don’t have enough pages in the paper to cover who she was,” he said. “We want her girls to know how beloved she was.
“She was never the type to burden another soul with anything, she was always the one who was there to help. She raised funds to help a little girl with leukaemia, another friend’s son had an inoperable brain tumour and she did everything she could to help.
“She touched everyone. She was so outgoing and crazy and the world has lost a light.
“We just hope that as her organs help others, they might suddenly want to start dyeing their hair in all the crazy colours she used to.”
For Sarah’s mum Lyn Evans, she said she wanted to acknowledge all the other families who were suffering from losing a loved one.
She said knowing that Sarah was already helping some avoid that fate was a huge help, but her grief was still raw.
“Her daughters were so brave through all this, they were the joy of Sarah’s life and I know she would be so proud,” she said.
“Sarah really was a special girl, so loving and outgoing and she just drew people in.
“Sarah wasn’t someone who made headlines, she wasn’t a celebrity, but she touched so many lives and I think of all the other families who have lost that light as well.
“People are lost every day, and every one of them matters. Just as our Sarah mattered.”
Originally published as Sarah Rose tributes: ‘You don’t have enough pages in the paper to cover who she was’
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